Not really even a short story, just something weird I wrote a while back. Weird in the sense of not being easy to write not wierd as in the sort of sex protrayed.

I was trying to write something more erotic than what I normally present as an erotic story.

Anyways see what you think.

Oh and have a barf bag handy. It starts slow but..
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The photos are superb. I'll be able to blow them up to life size and they'll still be crisp and clean.

My lover-who-can-not-be-my-lover had managed to capture scenes of Alpine life i thought had died out before the war... the first world war. There are maybe three or four of the 50 i don't like, too much poverty, the old man's face is too haggard. Don't think the guests will appreciate those cataract eyes starring blindly down at them.

The one of the teenage girl bathing naked under the water fall,with her dirndl lying in a pile crowned with her white panties, at the water's edge, that's going to be the focal point of the restaurant. Although i'll have to have my lawyers track the girl down and work out a contract.

She's sitting across the table cleaning her Leica with the intense concentration of a gun nut . She hadn't been happy about using a non reflex camera to start with but i had remained firm on that point. Only really old Leicas can give that depth i need. But to be honest, like all really talented photographers, if i had given her a pin hole camera made out of an old baked bean tin she'd have still produced something worth looking at.

I look up to her, nod and smile.

She lays her camera on the table.

" Cheri" She says " You know i long to sleep with you, don't you? And you know why i can't?"

Her eyes are tearing up.

We've been dancing around this point all day. From the moment i met her off the train here in Munich, through lunch and the walk by the Iser and now in my hotel room discussing the project.

Her husband and two small sons. Thats why.

I wish I could say he is a jerk and a bad husband but he isn't. According to her he is a dutiful, attentive partner and exquisite lover. Text book father too. But that's all he is. He isn't her best friend, her soul mate. He doesn't understand how her soul craves to express itsef or the talent she has.

I did. Thats my strength. Having just enough talent myself to recognise greatness in others then employing them. I'm a good cook but I'm not Chef Patron. My head chef was a dish pig in a pokey village pub who put out 30 perfect covers in an hour while the 'chef' slept off half a bottle of 'Stroh 80'[author's note: 80% Austrian rum, a staple in any Germanic kitchen]. One of those covers had been mine.

I'd seen My lover-who-can-not-be-my-lover's work on some website where amateurs 'critique' other amateurs and the trolls claim to have worked for David Bailey.

She has the rare talent of photographing what is really there not what your eye tells you is there.

My lover-who-can-not-be-my-lover wants me to take her. Take her, compel her. She wants me to force that which should be given freely. I should take that which she won't give her husband.

" I'm going to kneel over the bed ,baby. I want you to pull down my jeans and fuck me in my bum" .She never has got the hang of saying 'arse' ."Just this one time, I can never give you my vulva, you know that. But i will let you take my bottom. I mean 'take', baby. I have to be totally passive but i won't resist. But please make it a 'taking'...no lube, no passion, no tenderness. Do it as violently and as hard as you can."

My lover-who-can-not-be-my-lover walks over to the bed and kneels down , her knees on the floor and her chest on the bed, waiting. My cock is swelling, i want this.I want her. I want her screaming and weeping as i tear my way into her.I want my cock to be covered in her blood, and to hear her whimper afterwards, laying there curled into a shit and blood smeared fetal ball of hurt and shame.

I kneel behind her. Although she is thin her jeans are tight. I reach around her to undo the button and zip. I thought she might breath in slightly to make it easier but she stayed perfectly still, not wanting to help in anyway.I carefully undo her jeans and slowly pull the zip down, trying not to catch or snag her flesh.

Suddenly I am aware of the absurdity of it. I'm trying to not hurt her or get her skin caught in the zip but i'm intending to cause her more pain that she has probably experienced since she gave birth to her sons. She has told me before that she is very tight there and even in a warm bath had only ever been able to insert a single finger and that with difficulty. I'm about to force something almost 8" inches long and 4" in circumference into her virgin arsehole and i'm worried about 'catching' her with the zip??!

I feel slightly sick, sickened by myself. Sick for wanting to do this, for having an erection .But i DO want this. I want this so bad. Finally, after all this time, to be joined to her, to fill her.

I work the jeans down over her thighs, leaving them redden by the tightness of the cloth. With the tightness of jeans her panties come down a bit as well, exposing the top half of her cheeks. For a woman her age a fantastically round, pert butt.

I pull her panties almost down to her knees and the copper scent of her desire hits me.

I want to spread her and feel her juices flow over my finger, to pleasure and taste her. Drink and drown in her desire. But i know she won't let me.

I grasp her butt cheeks and spread them roughly. I can feel how tensed up she is. She doesn't shave and her 'salt n' pepper' pubic hair spreads down the inside of her thighs.

"Are you sure?" I ask. She just remains still. "You know that if i do this without lube it's going to hurt so bad?"

"That's the point" she replies "I want to feel you every step i take tomorrow and every minute i sit on that plane home to him tomorrow. And this is what you dream of and wank about isn't ,baby? Hurting me? Abusing me?" I hear that 'spun glass' tone in her voice. She's on the edge of breaking down. Again the feelings of self loathing are rising. Part of me wants this to end now, for her to jump up , grab her coat and run. The other part of me is standing tall and rock hard, pulsating...

"Then stick your butt out a little more, sorta 'doggy' like" I say.

She doesn't move. I repeat my request, still she doesn't move.

Then i realise she can't. Can't do something voluntary. This has to be forced, absolving her from guilt.

I bring my hand down on her butt cheek, hard, just once but immediately her skin turns red. "Do as you are told!" I bark at her and she sticks her butt out, spreading her knees slightly.

I spread her cheeks a bit more and her bum hole opens slightly. There is a little dried browness around the puckered skin and also i see a small black hemorrhoid peeping out. Piles are going to make this even more painful.

I spread her further, using some real force. She winces and buries her head deeper into the bed. Her 'rose' parts enough so i can see her hole. Keeping her spread at her upmost i lean forward, rising from my knees onto my toes, i position my cock at the entrance of her bum.

Once my head is touching her hole i let go of her butt cheeks and stemming with my toes, my hands now on her shoulders, i start to push with my hips.

I can't penetrate her. I push harder still. Hard enough that this is hurting my cock.
The muscles in her shoulders are like I-beams with tension. I throw myself forward with all my body weight.

I feel her ring part.

Her head comes off the bed, back bowed, screaming and suddenly my head is just in her. I can feel the dampness of blood already. She's whimpering and hyper ventilating now. I stay still a while, waiting for her to say 'stop, get out!' But she says nothing.

I push again, she's still so tight that i have to use all my force. She screaming again, muffled because she is forcing her mouth into the bed covers, forcing herself to be still.

The power of having her like this is making me dizzy, overwhelming the feelings of disgust i had before. It seems every scream, every whimper makes me harder still and drives me to force myself deeper. I want to increase her suffering.

Then my cock is blocked. My head touches something hard and warm. Her back passage wasn't free. Of course, i should have realised she wouldn't have prepared in any way for this.

I withdraw the half of my cock that was in her, there is a little of her shit and loads of bloody mucous on my head. I know she must be cramping up now, wanting to expel. And i expect her to get up and run to the bathroom.

Suddenly the smell of fecal matter hits me. She's farted. Still i'm expecting her to jump up and go. But she stays as she was. She's sobbing, wincing and grunting at the same time. I spread her cheeks with my hands again and see the 'cob' is already appearing. I let go of her again and go back a little bit.

The shit is hanging out of her now. Another deep breath and a teeth clenched wince and its between her legs , lying on the floor. A few drops of urine fall form between her legs.

Her shit as about the same size as my cock.

I'm gagging on the smell. Fucking vegetarian diet. You wouldn't eat tofu if you knew what it smelt like when it comes out the other end.

I grab some of the disposable lint free tissues that she used to clean the Leica from the table and scoop up the shit. Carried it into the en-suite and flush it away, trying not to cover the white tiles with the mediocre schnitzel I'd had for lunch. Washed my hands and lit a cigarette, giving her chance to flee.

She remains.

Even from the bathroom doorway I can see my palm print on her bum, angry red, promising black to come.

I smoke, she kneels waiting for me to recommence, her face still buried in the duvet.

I position myself again between her knees, the piss on the carpet quickly soaking through the knee of my jeans.

I position myself once again between her cheeks and she tries to bury her hips into the side of the bed. This time she knows enough to be frightened.

"Stick your bum up and out again" I command.

My lover-who-can-not-and-never-will-be-my-lover remains still. I spank her right cheek twice then stop and wait for her to obey.

She whimpers but stays as she was.

I go up on one knee, using my left hand to pressure the small of her back while my right angles my cock down sharply.

My head travels down her crack til I feel her hole with my tip.

Grabbing both her hips with my hand in force myself in again.

My cock almost bends double before her ring parts.

She's a little wider this time and the blood, shit and mucous acts as a lube of sorts.

I push all the way in my hips are against the top of her bum and I grind a bit to work myself in even deeper.

Then I pull myself out as a fast as I can.


People who've never done it imagine the pushing in is the painful part. In fact withdrawing can cause more pain.


Her bladder goes. Piss sprays down, soaking the side of the bed, the carpet and my legs. Her sobbing becomes hysterical.

"Assez.Finish it", she sounds almost delirious, choking sobs and her whole body shaking.

I thrust in again. Blood everywhere, running down her thighs. Can you burst hemorrhoids?

Letting go, willing myself to come.

Buried deep in her, my thighs sticky with her blood and piss I come.

Four times my cock spasms.

Four times the spasms carry me a millimetre deeper.

Four times she heaves. Four mouthfuls of vomit.

You wouldn't eat tofu if you knew what it looks like after a couple of hours digesting.

I sit on the bed stroking her hair, waiting for the shock, sobbing and pain to subside.

Cradling her head while she farts out the blood and semen.

The duvet now a mosiac of her every body fluid that will need soaking before the chamber maid comes in the morning.
------------------------------Fin---------------------------------------

YAAAAAAAAAAAYY!!! I'll edit in some comments, but I just wanted to get that in first.

Edit: Sweet jeebus that was gritty/dark/a tad disturbing. Nicely written, though it did lack the full background/richness of a lot of your work.

ha ha what the fuck

Whoa.. I feel so weird after reading that. I just waited for the bonding... And there was none. =[
Hardcore man. o_O"

Ha ha!

That was interesting.

The 'hero' was up to his balls in her arse...how much more 'bonding' do you want??!

:P

It's strange, because if this was before I got hurt by girls so much that my shoulder has permenant self harm scars, I wouldn't have liked that one bit.

Now I didn't even think of stopping reading, I just got hard as I read it and enjoyed how it was so different and about something that humans enjoy but no one will accept and everyone claims is 'wrong', even though both people wanted it.

Also, once past the introspection, wooooooooooooooooo for jackketch's literary output!

T'iz teh rathea guudz!

Kinda prose, little different, sort of erotic.

I liked it..

The one that got away, ketch?

Great stuff, Ketch. I love how it gets more and more fucked up as it goes on.

Fucked up? Maybe but the description of 'hard' anal is pretty accurate and based on experience.

Fucked up? Maybe but the description of 'hard' anal is pretty accurate and based on experience.

so, fucked up yeah? but i liked it 8/10

Fucked up? Maybe but the description of 'hard' anal is pretty accurate and based on experience.

Mmmm sounds a tad jackanory to me "jackanory *titters* how apt"........ The last time I read one of your "anal" stories was it not you taking it up the pooper somewhere out in the faterland?

Nicely written though 7/10 now go stand in the corner, hands on head and stand on one leg.......bad ketch.

Mmmm sounds a tad jackanory to me "jackanory *titters* how apt"........ The last time I read one of your "anal" stories was it not you taking it up the pooper somewhere out in the faterland?

Nicely written though 7/10 now go stand in the corner, hands on head and stand on one leg.......bad ketch.

*LoL-Lis @ jackanory*!!

But the anal sex was more or less accurate, I've certainly done it that way a few times and yes sometimes they do need the toilet BADLY.

*LoL-Lis @ jackanory*!!

But the anal sex was more or less accurate, I've certainly done it that way a few times and yes sometimes they do need the toilet BADLY.


Ewewpoop.......... too much information...........naughty, naughty, just downright naughty...... hands out palms down, sharp edge of the ruler across the knuckles!

Ewewpoop.......... too much information...........naughty, naughty, just downright naughty...... hands out palms down, sharp edge of the ruler across the knuckles!


Lot of men like the idea of anal sex (ie taking their partners that way) but don't consider the reality.

Its where shit comes out, mate. You start poking around in there and sometimes shit will come out.

Lot of men like the idea of anal sex (ie taking their partners that way) but don't consider the reality.

Its where shit comes out, mate. You start poking around in there and sometimes shit will come out.


Yes lots of men probebly do, dosen't mean its a nice thing, no-one is ever going to stick their dick up my arse no fucking way Hosay and I know I've spelt that wrong as well and by the way refering to me as "your mate" dosen't quite hack it as I am a girl! ......Ok.

Yes lots of men probebly do, dosen't mean its a nice thing, no-one is ever going to stick their dick up my arse no fucking way Hosay and I know I've spelt that wrong as well and by the way refering to me as "your mate" dosen't quite hack it as I am a girl! ......Ok.

The 'mate' was refering to the anal-wanting men.

And sorry but despite your many feminine charms...

ITS TIME FOR THE 'NOW SHOW on Radio 4!!!!!!!!!!!

*colour me GONE!*

The 'mate' was refering to the anal-wanting men.

And sorry but despite your many feminine charms...

ITS TIME FOR THE 'NOW SHOW on Radio 4!!!!!!!!!!!

*colour me GONE!*


Mmmmmmm low brow ketch very low brow!

colour = grey.

Mmmmmmm low brow ketch very low brow!

colour = grey.

[returning to topic] I thought you'd have a right go at me for my Leica bias.

barf bag? more like kleenex.

Thats cool but we do have people here of delicate dispositions. Hell Xiao thinks even french kissing is sinful.

That story made my anus hurt.

So if you would, how exactly do you go about preparing for anal sex so it isn´t quite so wretched?

For us more "vanilla" types.

Wel, that's my cock hard as fuck!

Most important is she has to WANT it and be massively turned on. A good Rule Of Thumb is 'If she isn't wet enough that you can use her vag juices as anal lube then she isn't ready'.

Giving her oral while she lies in missionary is good as everything flows downwards. I'd say , for a first time, she needs to be heading for her second orgasm before trying.

Doing 'doggy' the first time is a bad move too. Spooning is better option.

Despite what I said about using her juices as lube you must use a proper lube as well. Few women produce enough juice to be used on its own and while its an effective vaginal lube it isn't heavy duty enough for her arse.

Start slooooow. Try doing it over the course of several love-making sessions. Inserting first one finger .

A good time is while giving her said oral in missionary, start playing and teasing her bum hole with your finger. Build up to actually inserting it just before she comes and wtihdraw it carefully as she comes....can be pretty mind blowing I'm told.

Make sure your finger nails are short.

Enema's aren't really necessary as long as she has had a dump that day.

For the first time she really needs to control the penetration not him, so its best if she can hold his cock and and he stay still. Which is another reason why doggy ain't so good.

Oh btw, major tip, its a lot easier if she's just had a damn good spanking. Not sure why, but somehow it loosens her up.No I'm not joking.

Call me a prude if you must but I really do find all this bottom prodding talk quite distasteful.

Your reference to "Leica bias" sadly went right over my head....Is this a camera thing or did I not read something properly?

Just re-read original post, Tsk!

I'm with rocker on this one. Distasteful.

I vomited a little in my mouth...

I'm genuinely surprised. You always struck me differently , as 'hard boiled' (ie Freaky Deaky Monkey Sex hanging from the light fittings ..within the bounds of marriage of course).

God-damn didn't this thread die a month or so ago!

I feel quite freaked out now re-reading my alcohol fueled responses.......Still I stand by my convictions, bottoms are to be kissed and admired not rooted, thats for fairies and woofters.

You're missing out on so much :)

You're a fucking psycho.

God-damn didn't this thread die a month or so ago!

I.

Yeah but Digi has this whole resurrection thang going on, yaknow?

You're a fucking psycho.

Qu'est que c'est?

run run awaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay

That was a good read. I liked how it was very real, and it wasn't over the top or forced. You didn't go for the total gross out everything just flowed naturally.

Vous parlez français. C'est une bonne langue, non? J'ai oublié un petit peu parce que je ne pouvais pas prendre le français cette année, mais c'est la vie :/

Enema's aren't really necessary as long as you're a disgusting weirdo englishman

Fixed.

I was actually going to get something for tea, but now...

sweet! nice write ketch
ps. you would make a great lyricist with that last bit

*Stabs thread in the head*

Too disgusting for me...


...I can't stand a girl who won't shave

*rocker makes fatal assumption that thread's brain is located in its head*

And anyways even if you vanhelsing'd this thread , there'll be another piece of Ketch's fucked up scribbling along soon.

I'm working on a cyberpunk piece at the moment...or should that be 'cyberpuke'?

Wonderful thread resurrection, and just intime for valentines day!

Seriously, fuck anal. And here I was happily settled in the mode of thinking that girls didn't actually take dumps. I can't even imagine a situtation like this manifesting itself in my life.


What the fuck compelled you to continue? duty? honor?

Stop grizzling or i shall no choice but to recount the true story of how I learnt to make 'Spag Bol'. A charmingly and typically ketchian anecdote, nay a romance even, involving an australian MILF, a Rolling Stones t-shirt, yellow cotton panties with flowers on them and HOT oil olive.