So it started when I was browsing myspace.. [Dont worry, It gets less pathetic.. I promise]. I recognised a girl and added her. We had similar interests, attended grammar schools opposite eachother, I recognised her from somewhere.. All seemed cool. 30 comments later and we where no closer to figuring out where I knew her from. We then added eachother on MSN as now our pages where full of comments from eachother.

When on MSN she asked if I was single, and I replied "Yeah" and explained I had a possesive best friend who had ruined alot of things and that I was leaving her behind. She then said to me how I'm "going to make a girl lucky... extremely lucky".

We got talking about hobbies, how she adored Music and loved Art, Photography in particular. I explained how Music was a large part of my life, and I done alot of photography in abandoned locations, mainly abandoned sites - As I was into Urban Exploration heavily. To my utter surprise she knew about Urbex and was interested in it - but hadn't had any experiance with it.

I showed her a youtube slideshow of alot of my photo's and she was impressed, but shocked when she saw one site near where she lived. She asked if I could take her next time I went.. I tried my hardest, and managed to arrange a meeting. I was going to take a friend who also knew the building.

I went there very sleepy due to a wedding reception I had attended the night before. Once we met I thought "Fuck... She's pretty. She's interesting.. She's perfect". After feeling ill for half the visit we stopped and sat on the roof, away from the reach of security. While we where up there she asked about our love lifes, as a friend of hers had a crush on the friend I brought along. (They knew OF eachother through other friends) When it got around to her she said "My love life is perfect thankyou..." - So I thought she has a boyfriend.

I then explained my situation and was stunned when she gave me advice and tried to dig down the problem and seemed soo helpful. I was even more stunned when she said she was interested in Psychology, I felt like saying "Fuck - I have psychology books by my bed - Thats how interested I am in it.." - But feared that would look like I was trying too hard. So I didnt mention my interest.

The more we spoke, The more I fell for her. By the end we where joking, and walking arm in arm for a bit. When it came to saying bye we spent most of our time gazing in eachothers eyes. This felt amazing.. really powerful. Just looking and smiling..

That night on MSN she thanked me for adding her on myspace, thanked me for taking her out that day, thanked me for being there for her. Said that although we didnt know eachother for too long, that I was already trusted and someone she felt good about. Then she paniced about the 2 weeks I had away. [Got back yesterday]

We then met up 2 days afterwards - this time alone. We proceeded to sit under a tree in a rather quiet park - just chatting. We made the silliest jokes and daftest comments ever - but they seemed the funniest we had ever heard. We ended up playing stupid games with pebbles and sticks on the grass, and in the end we even startled play wrestling... which turned into hand holding.. with more eye contact. At one point we suddenly stopped as if we both knew we where getting to close..

Despite the fact I had 2 days before I left for 2 weeks. And the fact one of them days I was already seeing her - she wanted me to go to the seaside with her friends.. She persuaded me to go and I worked it all out in my head. Luckily, it fell through and I used that time to pack.

After that we met the day before I left for 2 weeks. It wasnt alone this time, it was with that friend. [He arranged it] When I met her he rang and said he'd be a bit late. So while we waited we got joking and close again. After that, he arrived and it went a bit down hill. We went strawberry picking and then had something to eat. Somehow I called her a man [Or she took a comment to mean that] and got quite upset. I felt sooo guilty, that I spent ages apologising.

I got home that night and packed for the next day. Knowing I wouldn't see the girl for 2 weeks. The girl I had only met about 6 days ago, yet had spent half of my time with during those 6 days, and more time talking via MSN.

During the 2 weeks we sent eachother txt messages [I couldn't ring due to the place I was at] and we got close again. During the 2 weeks I encountered problems but I could get rid of them by reading one of her txt messages. I didn't miss my family, I didn't miss my computer, I didn't miss anything.. But I missed the girl.

I had 2 points where I got down while I was away - 1) Losing my phone charger and 2) Ringing her up. Real problems involved friends being taken to hospital, being ill and butchering my thumb - but none of that worried me. Losing my phone charger meant I couldn't contact her - THAT worried me. When I rang her up conversation was hard and she hardly spoke - THAT worried me. Yet as soon as I found the phone charger, and as soon as she txt me apologising for the phone call.. well, My world was sunny again. She got me through those 2 weeks.

Now the day before I finished the 2 weeks, she left for a holiday. Now I have a few days to address the problem about her - she doesnt make sense...

*She turned down some boy and said "i have a boyfriend who means the world to me" too him - yet this boyfriend wasnt being spoken about to me. She mentioned him once, and he had nothing to do with the story. On her myspace hes got no special mentions, he aint even number 1.

*Her little brother said "I'm going around Davids house - I bet you wish you where coming" [As david, her boyfriend, has something new, forgot what]. She *slapped* her brother and said "NO, Im seeing someone else...". She ISNT violent - what made her hit brother, and what made her meet me instead of her bf?

*Where was her boyfriend that week? He was at home as the above proved, yet he didnt notice that 4 days out of seven was spent with some other guy? [4 days if the seaside hadnt fallen through]

*She never speaks about him? All my other girl friends dont stfu about there guys.

*All my girl friends seem to think our body language [holding hands, eye gazing, play wrestling, stupid little things etc] suggests more...

Basically, every second spent with her is another falling deeper for her. Im just getting over a friend who had a boyfriend, but said she loved me and I loved her.. I cant cope with it again. But this is the only person with so much in common.. let alone the only girl. Advice is needed badly, Thanks.

Let me the first to say...TL/DR.:D

What you need to do is find out how she feels about you compared to how she feels about him.

Its approaching such a subject though, without making it like a "make or break" thing. She's a really cool girl, and she seemed to worry about coping for the 2 weeks without me - I dont wanna lose her, especially if she already looks upon me like she does. ("Oh fuck.. What if something happens and you're away.. There will be no one..." - "What if you cant get to your phone.. or you're busy")

Give her plenty of opportunities to make it happen. Eventually, if she wants to, she'll take one. Maybe ask about her boyfriend?

Just by the way... you must be living like 50 years ago.

Words like "daft", "seaside" and the fact that you and her went strawberry picking?

Maybe it's just me...

heh, Strawberry picking was something I always used to do with my grandparents - But it was her idea this time. Did seem a little old fashioned! =]

As for daft - I seem to be using that word ALL THE TIME at the moment, Its really strange. I don't know why I'm suddenly using it after not hearing it for ages.

Make a move...lifes too short not to. I remember not moving. Just standing there doing sweet fuck all is the worst thing you can do. Find out if she likes you, this could be the love of your life. I envy you, I lost mine a while back.

holy fuck that was long...errm prove you're better than the other guy...I have no idea what im talking about I didn't read it

one quick thing. dont stand around and wait for it to happen. you lose way to many opportunities that way. as i have learned in the past

Only one solution.

Cut the brakes on her boyfriends car then go in for the kill if you know what i'm sayin'

tl;dr

However, don't even bother. Unless she hates her boyfriend or hes abusive or something, don't make a move. There isn't a bigger dick move to do then steal another guys girl. She's in a nice relationship and you shouldn't pry them apart for your own selfish gain. There are plenty of fish in the sea, you can find yourself a girlfriend without ruining some other guys life.

Yeah, I'd love to make a move its just the whole boyfriend situation. Plus, I don't want to feck everything up - She seems a cool girl and the type of friend I need. [One who I have alot in common with, Someone who I can do stuff with instead of doing it alone as usual]

one quick thing. dont stand around and wait for it to happen. you lose way to many opportunities that way. as i have learned in the past

Its just that other then standing around and just letting everything flow at its own speed - I don't know what to do.

I agree though - Standing around and not moving is a definite no-no.

I envy you.

Hope everything will turn out fine.

I read it as " So Im falling for her.. and she's a guy..."

Then I lol'd.

heh, why do you envy me?! (I just wanna see it from someone elses point of view, not my "omg what am I gonna do.. *sorry for himself*" one :P)

Thanks =]

heh, why do you envy me?!


Well, because you're in love with a girl that seems to be in love with you, and I'm yet to experience that.

Looks like her relationship with her boyfriend is not going very well anyway. If she spends more time with you than with him, don't ruin her and your happiness by not taking any action.

As for the details of what needs to be done, I'd let your relationship naturally evolve, with their relationship naturally getting weaker and weaker to the point where one of them would "officially" end it.
Or do what Malkog said:
Give her plenty of opportunities to make it happen. Eventually, if she wants to, she'll take one. Maybe ask about her boyfriend?
Either way, plan for keeping it, not loosing it.

Well, because you're in love with a girl that seems to be in love with you, and I'm yet to experience that.

Looks like her relationship with her boyfriend is not going very well anyway. If she spends more time with you than with him, don't ruin her and your happiness by not taking any action.

As for the details of what needs to be done, I'd let your relationship naturally evolve, with their relationship naturally getting weaker and weaker to the point where one of them would "officially" end it.
Or do what Malkog said:

Either way, plan for keeping it, not loosing it.

I must thank you *so much*, For helping me put it in perspective! Thats given me a much better outlook on the situation! :)

1. Get him drunk.
2. When he passes out, put him in the driver's seat of his car.
3. Place a brick on the gas.
4. ?????????
5. Remove brick.
6. Profit.

There isn't a bigger dick move to do then steal another guys girl.

A person isn't a possession. You can't steal someone if they want to come...

Waitwaitwaitwaitwait...

The way I understand it...
You still dont KNOW if she has a boyfriend.
She has never told YOU she has a boyfriend right?
I got the impression that she has never mentioned or talked about him in front of you.
If that's the case then WHAT THE FUCK MAN!?
Honestly...

If that's not the case, I think you should let her end it and then make a move.

That's kinda sweet actually, I'd say go for it man. Just send her a text "It comes down to this. I'm crazy about you, more than you could know and I want you to be mine. If you'd rather be with someone else, that's cool and I understand, and hope you're happy. If not, come round and we can chat."

Although I've been in your situation before, and it didn't turn out so nicely for me, in the end she wanted to stay with her boyfriend but have me there for emotional support when he wasn't around. Fuck that.

Ok, She asked me if I was single. I said "Yeah" and explained this situation - But I never asked if she was. [Part of me assumed she was single if she asked me. The other part didn't really care as she was just "this girl" who was getting a bit obsessive about me.]

I then met up with her and we got talking about our friends love life - as he was after one of her friends. Now I cant remember her answer when she was asked - but it was quick and quite upbeat though. But I'm sure it was "Mines going fine thank you.. Now about yours!" - She changed the subject pretty quickly. [She had just met me at this point]

Then she said to me on MSN "Shit.. Someones asking me out." and she turned them down. She then told me "I've told him that I have a boyfriend that means the world to me!".. But then we met the next day and thats when we got really close. When she made it sound like she had met me instead of her boyfriend - and thats when she said she slapped her brother. [Which I still don't really understand]

Apart from that - Shes never spoke about him to me. Shes mentioned a name that could be him twice - and that was merely in passing.

Well, That text sounds pretty good. I might say something similar to her next time I see her, Set the mood right. [A text could get to her at a bad time]

I was in a similar situation to the one you mentioned, I've only just got out of it really. The whole "I love you.. but I have a boyfriend. But I can take my stress and emotional difficulties out on you though!" didn't work...

Like the confused guy I am, I've just looked through some logs trying to make sense of what she says.

She lists stuff she has in common with her best mates and mentions the guy, who I think is the bf, there. [Stating they have nothing in common - but hes offered to teach her the guitar]

Then when she freaked out it was "oohh shit.. I'm gonna be stuffed when you're gone. No you.. No *this-dudes-name*... what if something happens?!".

He was around the day after we met, Which was the day before we met alone in the park holding hands and stuff. [So she saw him the morning before - Yet had nothing to say about him]

The first day we met, afterwards when we where chatting on MSN she was talking about how she took "lllooootttsss" of pictures of me.

So thats 3 times max that shes mentioned this name, Which my mate says is her bf. [I havent had her say that herself] These 3 times its just been in passing aswell...

Ffs.

I dont think she has a boyfriend.
Saying "i have a boyfriend" is a nice way for women to turn down the guy who was asking her out.
Cmon, ask her properly about her boyfriend.

"hiyuh, do you really have a boyfriend? he seems made up to me? you know what isnt made up? my dick up your arse so...my place or yours?"

Ffs.

I dont think she has a boyfriend.
Saying "i have a boyfriend" is a nice way for women to turn down the guy who was asking her out.
Cmon, ask her properly about her boyfriend.


^^What he said.

She didn't tell you that she has a boyfriend, that means you can either act as if she's single, or, better still, especially since it seems to be bugging you, ask her about her imaginary boyfriend.

I can't believe i read all that. First off, that was very well written. Yet I'm afraid I can't offer any decent advice as I've haven't been as "lucky" as you at meeting girls. So all I can say is good luck :).

I read everything, the impression i get is she is in love with you, but it doesnt change the fact that she has a BF

well it sounds good thar sir, but this story is probably slanted a bit to your view,

i knew a girl like that, we had tons of fun together, she didnt bring her boyfriend up much either, i knew she had one but kind of ingored it and hoped it went away.
then her boyfriend met me and now i dont see her, and the last time i spoke to her she was yelling at me "I wont stop loving him just because of you" (i dont know how she thought that up) the "just" was the part that hurt the most,

and shes hit me on more then one occasion....
and she liked to degrade me as well...

ja, have fun?

I'm pretty sure she has got a boyfriend - I just don't think they're that close.

I'll make sure to question the boyfriend soon.

I can't believe i read all that. First off, that was very well written. Yet I'm afraid I can't offer any decent advice as I've haven't been as "lucky" as you at meeting girls. So all I can say is good luck :)

Thanks! :)

I read everything, the impression i get is she is in love with you, but it doesnt change the fact that she has a BF

To be completely honest - Just having someone that loves me, and that I return that feeling to would mean the world to me.

Naturally, if it turned out she did love me - I'd want more.

Basically, This is my plan;
*Just go with the flow
*Try and open her up a little about her boyfriend
*Should the situation arise, Bring up my own feelings

*Should the situation arise, Bring up my own feelings

Be careful with this part. From what I hear, talking about your feelings, especially early on, is normally not a very good idea.

Be careful with this part. From what I hear, talking about your feelings, especially early on, is normally not a very good idea.

Thanks for the heads up!