|
|
 |
|
|
|
register |
bbs |
search |
rss |
faq |
about
|
|
|
meet up |
add to del.icio.us |
digg it
|
|
|
| Sex and Affection Anything and everything about sex and relations. Please try to keep this forum on-topic, since things tend to wander a bit. Search through old topics before posting a new one, as questions get repeated a lot here. |
 |
|
|
#1
 2007-04-03, 21:52 |
aluminium_jackets 
Regular
|
|
|
|
 A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
How many people here have come across this phenomenon. My girlfriend is a really delightful person, and we do have a very nice relationship. However, it is completely asexual. She is nineteen, and I am the first guy she's been with, and has told me "Before I started fancying you, I never thought about guys at all".
She was raised very strictly I think and is half Thai, but she claims to be disgusted by sex. When one of her friends showed her a porn video two weeks ago, it was the first she'd ever seen, and was reported to have been scared or freaked out or something by it. Certainly not turned on at any rate.
It took me four weeks to convince her to kiss me for God's sake! She keeps telling me she really loves me, and she does do everything in her power (short of anything sexual) to make me happy.
Has anyone met someone like this before? Also, how can I deal with it (please, no tips like "Just whip out your dick" or anything)?
|
|
#2
2007-04-03, 22:11 |
RogueWarheart
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
quote:Originally posted by aluminium_jackets:
How many people here have come across this phenomenon. My girlfriend is a really delightful person, and we do have a very nice relationship. However, it is completely asexual. She is nineteen, and I am the first guy she's been with, and has told me "Before I started fancying you, I never thought about guys at all".
She was raised very strictly I think and is half Thai, but she claims to be disgusted by sex. When one of her friends showed her a porn video two weeks ago, it was the first she'd ever seen, and was reported to have been scared or freaked out or something by it. Certainly not turned on at any rate.
It took me four weeks to convince her to kiss me for God's sake! She keeps telling me she really loves me, and she does do everything in her power (short of anything sexual) to make me happy.
Has anyone met someone like this before? Also, how can I deal with it (please, no tips like "Just whip out your dick" or anything)?
When you're one on one, just start soft and sweet. If you break out the 'cuffs, she'll freak. Kissing, feeling, oral... etc Just lead her and teach her.. and make sure she feels as little guilt as possible. Just time...
Or... just dump her..
|
|
#3
2007-04-03, 22:16 |
aluminium_jackets
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
I've tried the feeling and stuff (no oral), but it doesn't work! The most annoying (worrying?) thing is that she never realises, and I have to point out to her that I have been groping her tits for the last five minutes or that my hand is between her legs. Then she goes all embarrassed and stuff like she wishes I didn't. Maybe she just doesn't think in sexual terms at all...
|
|
#4
2007-04-03, 22:16 |
bobothemagichobo
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
Sounds exactly what is happening to me. My girlfriend is half Korean, though. Just go slow as hell. There isnt any other way.
PS. I have been going out with my girl for 5 months and I finally got her up to speed with the current sexual knowledge/maturity level for her age.
It WILL pay off in the end.
|
|
#5
2007-04-03, 22:18 |
old-codger
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
Some of the porn we see nowadays is pretty freaky stuff, a hell of a lot of it is about male power, women/girls being choked and contorted into all manner of positions and having massive cocks shoved in every orifice, you need to tell her that that is not real sex. No wonder she was scared and put off.
My First girlfriend was a virgin, she even thought masturbation was dirty, We just took it steady and progressed through all the stages till it ended up with her hot enough to want full on sex and me pushing her away (no condoms at the time) When it happened it was great and she couldn't get enough of it.
|
|
#6
2007-04-03, 22:29 |
moonmeister
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
She's a Thai Tranny. She'll have to be taught to act like a natural woman.
|
|
#7
2007-04-03, 22:47 |
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
Step 1 :
http://www.asexuality.org/home/
Refer her to AVEN.
Step 2 :
Get a fuckbuddy on the side. Better yet, fifty of 'em.
Step 3 :
Have the beautiful, heartwarming emotional bonding and mutual support with the aesexual chick, vigorous, no-strings sexual fulfillment with your harem of fuckbuddies - and congratulate yourself on the most fulfilling, uncomplicated, downright perfect relationship(s?) of human history.
Have fun.
|
|
#8
2007-04-03, 22:49 |
Vegetable Man
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
LAWL. She "fancys" you. She's a keeper.
|
|
#9
2007-04-03, 23:06 |
radioman
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
Rape her, or screw with her head. Act like you are loosing interest and are sexually attracted to other girls. That will make her try harder. Just fucking stick your fingers up in her when you start making out and make her love the shit. If she gets freaked out ball gag her. If she is going to be that prude you gotta take action. Make her jump in the pool instead of just dipping her toes.
|
|
#10
2007-04-03, 23:39 |
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
quote:Originally posted by JoePedo:
Have the beautiful, heartwarming emotional bonding and mutual support with the aesexual chick, vigorous, no-strings sexual fulfillment with your harem of fuckbuddies - and congratulate yourself on the most fulfilling, uncomplicated, downright perfect relationship(s?) of human history.
Have fun.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ...
Laughed my arse off at the thought of this. It's friggin' perfect!
|
|
#11
2007-04-03, 23:51 |
Optionryder420
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
I was thinking sheltered as in, her parents sheltered her from everything in the outside and she grew up in a rich neighborhood.
That'd be my girlfriend... she thinks downtown St. Petersburg Fl is ghetto...
Here are some pics: http://tinyurl.com/274s92 http://tinyurl.com/yslhrm http://tinyurl.com/2fpbbk http://tinyurl.com/yqltbs
Yeah, most sheltered person I know.
|
|
#12
2007-04-04, 00:01 |
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
Just whip out your dick
|
|
#13
2007-04-04, 00:38 |
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
quote:Originally posted by Punk_Rocker_22:
Just whip out your dick
I'm tempted REALLY to say that.
As others said, do a slow curve, not a steep hill.
|
|
#14
2007-04-04, 01:18 |
Taquito
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
For the unqualified psychologist post: I think she knows that you are rubbing and groping her. She likes it and thinks it feels good. By ignoring it she gets to enjoy it without coming to terms with the fact that theres a hand on her cooch.
All she's probably thinking is that "this is really good". If you turn her mind from that to "I am doing what the preacher said is evil and betraying god", you start to have a problem.
Just keep feeling around and makin' her feel good. Eventually she'll come to terms with the idea of what you are actually doing. Now getting a handjob or anything from her is going to be a real bitch.
|
|
#15
2007-04-04, 01:23 |
uncoiledspaghetti
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
that sucks. i have the opposite problem. i met my girlfriend last christmas break, and havent seen her since then, but i'm going back in a few weeks and apparently she expects me to fuck her, even though we're both virgins.
oh wait, that's not a problem.
yay for me!
oh and i'm terribly sorry to hear about your loss.
|
|
#16
2007-04-04, 01:55 |
GHS ANARCHIST
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
dump that bitch, she won't change.
i know the type
flood control is bullshit by the way
|
|
#17
2007-04-04, 02:06 |
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
quote:Originally posted by Optionryder420:
I was thinking sheltered as in, her parents sheltered her from everything in the outside and she grew up in a rich neighborhood.
That'd be my girlfriend... she thinks downtown St. Petersburg Fl is ghetto...
Here are some pics: http://tinyurl.com/274s92 http://tinyurl.com/yslhrm http://tinyurl.com/2fpbbk http://tinyurl.com/yqltbs
Yeah, most sheltered person I know.
Hey I'm from St Pete!! My parents still live in Seminole, but I haven't been there in like 5 years.:/
And I was very, very sheltered growing up...So much so that I never had oral sex until I had been married for like a YEAR and I didn't know anal sex was possible until I was like 20. My husband would talk about it, but I thought he was just being gross and trying to shock me.
I don't know WHAT to tell you, because my husband still thinks I'm this huge prude. I guess there's no cure.  |
|
#18
2007-04-04, 02:52 |
uncoiledspaghetti
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
quote:Originally posted by Optionryder420:
I was thinking sheltered as in, her parents sheltered her from everything in the outside and she grew up in a rich neighborhood.
That'd be my girlfriend... she thinks downtown St. Petersburg Fl is ghetto...
Here are some pics: http://tinyurl.com/274s92 http://tinyurl.com/yslhrm http://tinyurl.com/2fpbbk http://tinyurl.com/yqltbs
Yeah, most sheltered person I know.
when you post pics, they're supposed to be of the girl.
what are you new to totse?
|
|
#19
2007-04-04, 03:13 |
Optionryder420
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:
Hey I'm from St Pete!! My parents still live in Seminole, but I haven't been there in like 5 years.:/
And I was very, very sheltered growing up...So much so that I never had oral sex until I had been married for like a YEAR and I didn't know anal sex was possible until I was like 20. My husband would talk about it, but I thought he was just being gross and trying to shock me.
I don't know WHAT to tell you, because my husband still thinks I'm this huge prude. I guess there's no cure.
I currently reside in Seminole, right off of Park Blvd next to the bridge to the beach.
I think we've come across many times about this too... lol.
This place hasn't change much in 5 years, except a TON more condo's on the beach, and the fact that they're thinking about revamping Seminole Mall and Parkside mall already has been redone.
Other then that, nothing.
And, I've already posted MANY pictures of my girlfriend on here.
Too bad you missed it. |
|
#20
2007-04-04, 04:41 |
|
Moderator
|
|
The fine line between genius and madness
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
If she's such an annoyance, I'll take her off your hands. I like I challenge.
First off, most innocent types would be spooked by the porn. You may want to let her know that's not what real sex is like. I'm making an assumption on the video, but a reasonable one I think. Maybe you should ask her friend what it was your girlfriend saw, so you have a better idea of specifically what to reassure her about.
You'll never get anywhere if you can't get her interested in sex. She doesn't seem to have any problem with you touching her, so may I suggest giving her a massage? Take it seriously, and be thorough. Deep relaxation can lead to lowering of inhibitions.
I'm not saying that she'll suddenly let you into her pants, but that's not the goal at this point. It's to make her more receptive to the types of touches that most women find exciting. Trailing touches up the small of the back and side of the neck. Light brushes against the inner thigh. Other people here can give you a better list than I can.
The whole point of all this is to get her accustomed to being touched in ways that feel good. Make her wonder how good other touches would be.
It's not a speedy solution, but unless she truly is asexual rather than just suppressing her sexuality (like is more likely), you should see some results.
Keep in mind, I am nothing more than a talented amateur when it comes to dealing with women. You can probably get more detailed advice elsewhere.
I hate, hate, hate to say this, but that kind of general indifference tends to be a symptom of childhood abuse.
|
|
#21
2007-04-04, 04:42 |
Keriba
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
quote:Originally posted by GHS ANARCHIST:
dump that bitch, she won't change.
i know the type
flood control is bullshit by the way
Yeah, she sure sounds like a real bitch.
You cunt.
|
|
#22
2007-04-04, 05:35 |
Cloaked Dagger
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
quote:Originally posted by Optionryder420:
I was thinking sheltered as in, her parents sheltered her from everything in the outside and she grew up in a rich neighborhood.
That'd be my girlfriend... she thinks downtown St. Petersburg Fl is ghetto...
Heh, you need to bring her down here so see can see all the crackheads laying on the side of the street at midnight in the club district of downtown Miami(and I'm not even exagerating in the slightest, well it's more like a block away from the clubs).
Is this that same redheaded girl that you were with way back in the days of TRMF? Or is it a new one? I seem to recall you breaking up with the redheaded one I could be wrong about that though.
Sorry about the hi-jack
|
|
#23
2007-04-04, 16:03 |
aluminium_jackets
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
Hmm. Some of those were helpful. Some of them weren't, but thanks anyway. I sort of expected someone to quote my whipping comment, but there we go. Prometheis, your reply seemed to make the most sense. Thankies.
|
|
#24
2007-04-04, 17:05 |
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
Does totse look really wierd to anyone else?!
|
|
#25
2007-04-04, 17:40 |
Cloaked Dagger
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Xiao Mei
Does totse look really wierd to anyone else?!
|
Jeff Hunter finally updated the forum software. Seems a few bugs are still being worked out. |
|
#26
2007-04-05, 18:00 |
dead_people_killer
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
http://www.asexuality.org/home/
Refer her to AVEN.
Maybe its just me, but the whole description that they have on that site makes me think of really weird Stepford wives or some kind of cult or something.
|
|
#27
2007-04-06, 01:37 |
Plug
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
Perhaps she is embarrased by her peenzor
|
|
#28
2007-04-06, 02:03 |
Sick_Boy
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
She's probably just really shy since she has no experience. The first time I had any kind of sexual contact with a guy (minus little kiddy truth or dare shit) was when I was 15. It was actually with my current boyfriend, lol. But anyway, the point is that I was super shy. He was feeling my tits and playing with my cunt through my pants, and even though I was enjoying it, I just sat there all stiff because I didn't know what to do.
Like other people have been saying, just give her time. If she's really into you, she'll come around eventually...
|
|
#29
2007-04-06, 02:12 |
stab
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
I had a naive girl once, never-before kissed. I think some people here might have heard the story. I was fucking her within a month.
Just hang in there mate, you're the teacher, she's the student.
|
|
#30
2007-04-06, 04:30 |
2unl2
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
if this is her first relationship, as soon as she starts to get to know herself better she'll break up with you and go to a new guy. i think right now she doesnt know what she really wants, she like a little kid basically.
|
|
#31
2007-04-06, 06:33 |
Optionryder420
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
Heh, you need to bring her down here so see can see all the crackheads laying on the side of the street at midnight in the club district of downtown Miami(and I'm not even exagerating in the slightest, well it's more like a block away from the clubs).
Is this that same redheaded girl that you were with way back in the days of TRMF? Or is it a new one? I seem to recall you breaking up with the redheaded one I could be wrong about that though.
Sorry about the hi-jack
Same redhead.
She's so sheltered that she still thinks of Miami as nothing but a beach and some shops and clubs and all nice and cozy.
|
|
#32
2007-04-06, 10:16 |
Mindless Xyzzyean
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
One word = Trust
That one word is appropriate for pretty much every situation I can think of in my head.
|
|
#33
2007-04-06, 10:21 |
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Prometheus
If she's such an annoyance, I'll take her off your hands. I like I challenge.
First off, most innocent types would be spooked by the porn. You may want to let her know that's not what real sex is like. I'm making an assumption on the video, but a reasonable one I think. Maybe you should ask her friend what it was your girlfriend saw, so you have a better idea of specifically what to reassure her about.
You'll never get anywhere if you can't get her interested in sex. She doesn't seem to have any problem with you touching her, so may I suggest giving her a massage? Take it seriously, and be thorough. Deep relaxation can lead to lowering of inhibitions.
I'm not saying that she'll suddenly let you into her pants, but that's not the goal at this point. It's to make her more receptive to the types of touches that most women find exciting. Trailing touches up the small of the back and side of the neck. Light brushes against the inner thigh. Other people here can give you a better list than I can.
The whole point of all this is to get her accustomed to being touched in ways that feel good. Make her wonder how good other touches would be.
It's not a speedy solution, but unless she truly is asexual rather than just suppressing her sexuality (like is more likely), you should see some results.
Keep in mind, I am nothing more than a talented amateur when it comes to dealing with women. You can probably get more detailed advice elsewhere.
I hate, hate, hate to say this, but that kind of general indifference tends to be a symptom of childhood abuse.
|
QFTMFT |
|
#34
2007-04-06, 13:33 |
Fascismo
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
Cockslap
|
|
#35
2007-04-07, 05:22 |
Cloaked Dagger
Regular
|
|
|
|
Re: A truly sheltered (read "naïve") girl.
Same redhead.
She's so sheltered that she still thinks of Miami as nothing but a beach and some shops and clubs and all nice and cozy.
Damn bro. You gots to get you two over here so you can unshelter that girl. We can go shooting, head down to the clubs, drop some acid/E, snort some coke(miami has the best coke in the country, though I'd probably have to track down a new contact), party the night away, generally raise hell, maybe get the chance to shoot a crackhead or two on the way there/back. It'll be fun!
That is, unless you like having such an innocent sheltered girl. Personally I like girls that are a little slutty, kinky, and into drugs(because if I can't roll with her there's gonna be a problem)
|
|
|
|
To the best of our knowledge, the text on this page may be freely reproduced and distributed.
totse.com certificate signatures
|
|
|
About | Community | Bad Ideas | Drugs | Ego | Erotica | Fringe | Society | Technology
|
|
|
|
|
|
![]()
![]()
|
