I looked at that other bank robbing post and thought it to be pretty lame, so, here's how it's done, simple, easy, and straight to the point.

Things you need:

1. Any thin coat, preferably with a pocket on the inside

2. A banana

3. Paper and pen (Optional)

4. Motorcycle (Not really, I just think they look cool.)

(You don't even need a fucking gun!)

The first thing you do is get all these things, and go up to the bank clerk named, let's just call the clerk "Mike". Ok, so you're at the counter with Mike, and you shove the banana in your pocket and make it look like a gun. Then you give Mike the slip of paper that says, "Give me all the money, mother fucker. I got a gun. You have 10 seconds."

Next, after the bitch Mike gives you the money, you shoot him in the head and you run off with the money. You get on your kick-ass motorcycle and make like a meat and beat off. My suggestion is head for Canada or Mexico. I prefer Canada over Mexico, though.

If Mike by any chance refuses to give you the money, which he won't, just pop the fucker in the head and go to the next availible clerk.

And that stupid fucker Mike thought he had a chance up against you..

PLEASE try this out as soon as possible and tell us how it worked out. Any actual serious "criminal" would know that bank robbing is stupid, it's too high-profile and the chance of actually pulling it off would be so minute. Carding would make way more sense, and even then...not to many people card anymore.

Has there been ANY succesful bank robberies in the U.S. in the last 5 years?

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Originally posted by Frank_Wallet:
[B] Next, after the bitch Mike gives you the money, you shoot him in the head and you run off with the money. B]

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how would you shoot him with a banana?

i think he was being "witty".
if "mike" starts chasing you, you could then peel the banana and throw the peel down for him to do a comedy slip.

Hahahahahahahahhaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. Man this is the first posts in months that made me laugh out loud for a minute. Of course he is joking for those of you taht dont know. ROFLMAO

Um, no. Read up on a couple of books that people have made about bank robbing. They are a little bit better. Why leave the country for 30 grand?

no it's the smartest thing anyone could do!
you get to travel, and get adventure, and nevermind thats a crappy idea.
i don't understand the allure of banks. sure they have money, but they also have so many security measures it's insane.
Just rob a freakin' conveinence store on a nice part of town.
or a novel idea would be to get a job.

Whether you rob a bankor convenience store,you won't get more than a few grand...sure, take the risk for gettin a dick in your ass for the next 25 years for a few grand...... that's a great idea.

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Originally posted by ShockWaveTrio:
Has there been ANY succesful bank robberies in the U.S. in the last 5 years?

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There's been plenty. It happens all the time.

If I were to rob a bank I would get one of the small branches that are all over the place. The little tiny ones that have like 2 tellers inside and a drive through. Hop the counter and handcuff them to something. Open the drawers and get your own money. Hop in a stolen car(you'd be dumb to use your own) and drive off. Ditch the car after several blocks and lose the jacket, sunglasses, hat, and whatever other easy to remove clothes you have on. An entirely differnt outfit under sweats would probably be good too. After that walk a few more blocks to your real car and drive back to your home town while obeying all traffic laws and not standing out in any way.

Home town? Of course, why the hell would you rob anything that's in a town that would have people that can recognize you? You would be fucked if someone you knew just happened to see you getting out of your getaway car and wanted to talk to you or something.

Not using a gun is a smart idea. Using a gun adds alot of time onto your prison sentence if you get caught.

Another good idea would be to set off a few small bombs in high profile areas(keep them small) or call in a bomb threat at a mall, school, hospital, or all three. Get shit going so that all of the cops are busy far away from the bank and wont be able to get there for several minutes. If you can keep the cops away for the first 5 minutes after getting out of the bank you chances of getting away increase substantially.

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Originally posted by jsenza:
Whether you rob a bankor convenience store,you won't get more than a few grand...

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Next time you're in line at a bank, look at the tellers that are counting out what they have in their drawers(at the beginning or end of their shifts) and take a peek at some of the paperwork that's laying around. I saw a inventory sheet or something like that once laying on the counter by a teller, that had her name and a checklist of what bills she had in the drawer. It was close to $5,000, multiply that by 2 or 3 and you've got a decent amount of money if you plan stuff well. I've also seen a report laying around that said my little 2 teller/1 drive through satelite branch(or whatever they call them) had over a million on hand(too risky to try to get it all, but it puts it into perspective about what's there). A few grand is more than enough to make people take alot of risks, not that it's a good idea. People get desperate and will do alot to get some cash.

Another thing. Fuck partners. There's alot more lone bank robbers that get away and live happily ever after . With a partner your chances of getting fucked over increase alot. If it's necessary make it 1 or 2 at the very most and make sure they have your back. Make sure that it's the type of friend that is willing to take a bullet for you or go to prison without narcing on you. Friends like that are really hard to find, but are worth it.

Did u get dat off the movie where he robs a bank wid a felt pen marker? And then did you change the marker wid a banana? Good idea dude! Except you need some help.....you obviously have some kind of brain cancer.

The best way to plan a robbery is to break in to the bank over a holiday vacation, where it wont be open for a few days. I saw it on discovery channel, the crooks came in through the roof of the vault. they put dynamite on the roof and sand bags over the dynamite.

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Originally posted by ShockWaveTrio:
Has there been ANY succesful bank robberies in the U.S. in the last 5 years?

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Yea there was quite a few where im from but, not anymore impossible to do an armed robbery now, at a bank you cant even see the tellers. An robbing a bank is stupid i would rather rob a armor trucked alot of money mininum secruity, especially if you get someone from the inside. you can make a quarter million easy.

[This message has been edited by illprophet (edited 12-25-2002).]

Just as a side note: Bank Robberies have a 70% success rate.

Tommy Vercetti pulled one in the 80's....

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Originally posted by illprophet:
i would rather rob a armor trucked alot of money mininum secruity, especially if you get someone from the inside. you can make a quarter million easy.

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There was an armoured truck robbery in QLD Australia a few years ago, they simply lent over a brick wall at a shopping center loading dock. And told the guys to throw the bags over the wall, they escaped with $200,000 and the only description was 2 right handed males wearing balaclavas!

Not bad for a days work

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Originally posted by PhatMonkey:
Did u get dat off the movie where he robs a bank wid a felt pen marker? And then did you change the marker wid a banana? Good idea dude! Except you need some help.....you obviously have some kind of brain cancer.

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The post may not of been very original, but at least he dont steal of his parents you fucking wanker!