I'm at the local Super Fresh today (grocery store, for you non USAnians in the audience) in search of chicken broth.

They've installed a set of swanky self-checkout lanes in this one. I hear these are big in Europe (what with the new universal Euro and all) and Kmart has similar items as well. They're supposed to make your checkout experience more faster and more rewarding or whatever marketingese they feel like putting behind it, but in reality they're little more than massive electronic pains-in-the-ass.

For starters, they have this really annoying patronizing female computer voice that not only barks instructions for the flagrantly stupid ("scan items now..."), but announces to the store the name and quantity of every single item you buy. And it does it in an extremely grating manner - Instead of "Condensed Soup" it will say "Cambels Homestyle Chicken and Noodle Condensed Soup" or some other inane and pointless trademark. This in itself is bad enough, but you can't scan another item until the damn thing shuts up.

That's enough of that tangent, though. For payment you can use a credit or ATM card, or pay with cash. The machines supposedly take all manner of change (even pennies) as well as all types of bills up to $100. They accept, for now, both new and old style US currency.

For your shopping convenience, however, the bill testing threshold seems to be set unusually low. I paid for my chicken broth with the rattiest, most wrinkled, crumpled ass five dollar bill I've seen in years. The machine sucked it up, OCR'ed it correctly as a fiver, and dutifully spat out three dollars-and-some in change. Nice, crisp one dollar bills.

I thinks to myself, I thinks, "Hmm. One could probably pass off a fifty one copied with one's computer and not only pay for groceries, but be presented with a hefty amount of real change as well."

What can I say? I have a criminal mind.

Either way, this seems like a pretty lucrative gig to me. I'd doubt they would easily be able to detect your counterfiet bills, should the machine accept them, but even if they did it would likely be a challenge for them to link the bill with a face.

Thoughts?

~Zero

i just buy a case of beer, put it in my car and then go back in grab another and show them the receipt for a case of beer and they tell me "thanx, have a good day"

They've had self-checkout lanes at my local Kroger for quite a few months now. Luckily, they don't seem to be as verbose as yours. They do scream for assistance if you so much as fart, but they don't announce what brands of condoms and hemorroid cream you're buying. The bill acceptors seem equally lax, though they won't take 100s. It's taken cash with folded corners, inch-long tear, and "Legalize Pot" stamps all over them. That's an interesting idea..

I thought they tested the flow of electricity across the bill or something. Also, i think new bills with the lines in it accepts electrons and bounces it back so its almost a fool proof verify process, maybe thats whats making it so fast. Im not sure on these facts.

I've used the old-style bills with no problem. No one would use such a restrictive system in such an application.

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Originally posted by Zero the Inestimable:

Either way, this seems like a pretty lucrative gig to me. I'd doubt they would easily be able to detect your counterfiet bills, should the machine accept them, but even if they did it would likely be a challenge for them to link the bill with a face.

Thoughts?

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We have the same thing at Meijers here in Michigan. Yes they will take some shitty looking money with no problem.

As far as not being able to link a face to the bill, have you noticed that there are three times as many cameras over those lanes as there are over the regular "cashier" lanes? And depending on when the machine is emptied they would just go back to the tape and would probably be able to figure out down to a 15 minute period when the $50 was used. Then it is just a process of elimination of the faces on the tape.

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess you would have a "guilty" looking puss. But then again, I've seen the quality of the police and security personnel so you would have in the realm of 50 years before you would have to worry about them showing up to your door.

if you wear some old clothes a hat and sunglasses they wouldnt recognize you

I have stollen from them and I have been cought what I do is I take a bunch of items and slide 1 accross and while it is talking I scan 2 more so the 2 items arnt picked up

when I got cought doing this I was like oh Im sorry I didn't know and then I complained how dumb that was that is didn't pick it up

then they let me go with the bag of crispy chicken thighs that I had stolen because they also thought it was dumb and they wanted to keep me comming back

I dont know if it will accept fake money