this my sound dumb but it has worked for us over long periods of time when we have had no $$$
1) pizza hut
go to pizza hut and go to the all you can eat thing with some mates
( beeing stoned there is soo fun) and once you have had a feed just start beeing rowdy and throw food at each other and eventualy the manager will ask you to leave and when he does say "if your gonna kick us out were not paying" then leave
2)macdonalds (this one takes a while)
go into a maccas and just stand out of the way dont order anything just stand or sit there after a while the manager will come and ask what you are doing just say"i'm waiting for my big mac meal deal with no pickles on the big mac" and he will chase it up for you and give it to you for free

thats all for now
-krazd

Or you could eat at any decent resteraunt and simply walk out without paying.

Yeah, takes a real fucking mastermind to think up some plot like that when you can do to a resteraunt who's meat doesn't taste like leather, eat, stand and leave. What are they gonna do, chase you?

thay just might chase you and catch you then your in shit with them and the cops this way is legeal

And what are they going to do when they catch you, physically hold you down and wait for the cops to come? Just shrug them off and keep walking.

ok here is a trick go to the restaurant and buy a big meal and then a few minutes later your friend walks in he orders coffee or a pop depends on age. then after the bill comes got to the bathroom leave the bill in there, a few minutes later your friend goes into the bathroom takes your bill and leaves his the you go back in a few minutes later and pick up his or just switch the bills it doesn't matter but either way you make sure that the guy with food sits in a corner or a place were nobody can see him and the guy with the pop sits in the open this way when you pay your bill of like $1.00 for the pop and he complains because all he had was a pop and you are charging him for a whole meal and then go to another reastaurant and now he gets a meal and you get a pop.

1) Go to nice restrauant (The Boulevard on the embarcadero is one I like)

2) Order Steak and Lobster

3) Drink yourself silly

4) Eat food

5) Shoot the Waiter

6) Proclaim yourself the messiah

7) Leave

yes, but that plan would soon lead to a worldwide shortage of waiters..

not necessarily a bad thing for the gene pool, but it'd be hell on getting a decent meal..

Not to mention the difficulty we'd have finding bit part actors on short notice.

Heres an idea go to a restaurant at like 10:30 when nobody is there exept the waiters and when nobody is looking go behind the cash register and grab a carton of smokes and a bunch of choclate bars.

although that whole shooting the waiter sounds like fun would it not be easier to


1. order

2. eat

3. shoot the waiter

4. get up

5. shoot all witnisses

6. run out back door

7. go home


This way there is nobody to say to the police ya he was about "6'1 and around 180 pounds.

If you really feel like doing something out of the ordinary you might try getting some used condoms and leaving them inside the clit of a dead woman and then putting her pants on as if nothing happened and leave it for those perverted sickos that undress and rape the dead people before they put them in the casket (make sure you are not the person who used the condom or else you will have to shoot the police when they come to your house and that would just be to much running.

Stealing from some ok. From each other, not.

RC, explain how to get a used condom inside a cadaver's clitoris.

virgin alert..

Yeah, I'd like to know how you do that.. short of surgery..

Even with surgery I think it would be rather impossible.

less of impossible and more of a tactical flaw in my plan. well hmm. for second I thought of something but then I thought how that wouldn't work and now I just plain forget.

Why does every one pick on the 13 year old virgin necrophiliac?

If I was gonna try to get food from a place for free, I would just rob the grocery store and get something to make myself, that way I could hit the register on my way out, and make a few bucks.

Here is a book with information on free food and other useful stuff. http://members.nbci.com/_XMCM/mtoal/books/steal-this-book/index.html some of the info might be dated.

you laugh now but wait tell you have an undieing urge to fuck and rape a dead body then what huh... will see whos laughing. damn you guess are still laughing at me? it's a sick world we live in these days.

that crap in that book wont work, swapping bills etc. dunno bout US but in europe the waiters have pretty good memory and remember shit!

id say the only thing that would work and be least risky if ya really dont have any cash on you would be a variation of Trippy_McGee plan:

-go to a restaurant that has tables on the street, you know on a small square or something.

-park a bike/scooter or even car there. best is bike couz it dont have no numberplate and you can escape fairly easily.

-eat & drink. dont order too expensive stuff cause it wil irrise suspision!

-while eating observe how long it takes for the waiters to leave and come back out. when done eating about 3/4 way, go inside to the toilet. then walk out heading straight for the bike or whate ever and leave. Because you went to the toilet, the people eating outide saw you go in and might think you paid. they will no try to stop you as they might try if you just leave.

BUT THIS IS FOR HOBOS! i wouldnt do anything like it .... .... .... (exept of course if there would be no other way)

Food tastes better when you don't have to pay for it.

I agree food is much better knowing that the 10 back up dollors that you brought just incase you get cought is still in your pocket when you leave.

Go to a good health food restaurant.

Call over a waiter

Kill him

Eat him

why go to a good health food restaurant to kill a waiter to eat him?

why not just kill the first person you see on the street. saves you alot of effort.

*malicious grin ;>* i dunno but if i were going to try and get some free food id simply order , eat, put some random disgusting thing in the food(when ive finished eating of course) call the waiter over and complain , request a manager, (when the waiter goes to retrieve the manager) RUN! also ive heard that kentucky fried chicken will give you free food if you claim to be homeless (ive never tried this myself but ive heard that it works) much luv stay on the up take it ez adios n all that jazz VE