Looking through some of the older topics I noticed that there was a dicussion about doing stuff on stage and I saw some pretty lame stuff but I thought you folks might have some suggestions. My new band, Satan's Butt Rash is trying to figure out to set audience members on fire without severely injuring them. We've thought about dousing people with ethanol or butane. We've also thought about throwing molotov cocktails out into the crowd. Anybody else have some suggestions?

Try killing them first, then it wouldnt matter... maybe pull some cadavers from the morgue... or even a paper mache fan if youre a little squeemish... My stage show was NOT lame!!

I suggest burning barrels of Diesel fuel in front of the stage...It will fill the place with a thick black choking smoke. The crowd will not be able to see you...then hit them with molotov cocktails...or an alcohol fire that burns transparent they won't know what's going on...

Hey bastard, the molotovs were my idea, so if you give credit for that one you are just a wuss......

Another thing, you are a dumbass if you think you can light the audience on fire spontaneously without hurting them. I'll see you and your band (which probably sounds like me farting through a funnel) behind bars.

Badshit I think you rate even lower than I rate Matius.
Let's set the crown on fire without hurting them. You and your band are pussies. If you would set them on fire with the intention of hurting them and you told them first, as a dare, then your audience and your band would be somewhat cool.

Satan's Butt Rash. You crack me up, what a dork.

Hey! I've got an idea!

Step away from the keyboard

Now keep going! and Going
and going!!!!!!

Why don't you demonstrate what you're talking about? C'mon, don't be a pussy wussy puddin pie you pimple on the ass of all you try!

I very much look forward
to wishing you goodbye!
of course until then ...
you can fuck off and die!

oh and btw, try to come up with original titles for your topic titles, as in your titles for topics and not somebody elses, are you up to the challenge or what? jeeeez ...

I would have ingnored it if I thought is was yours, but noooo, instead I get to come and see you make an ass of yourself right from the git go, just go , go away.

It's so hard to visualize anything
truly inspired when surrounded
and not to mention, moderated,
by some nauseous gas who had to get the idea to fart itself here from someone else!

End of round one, you're down!
you better show up for round 2!
Nimrod
dildos, let that sink in....

I heard he went solo, his effort is called "satan penile warts." Dildo.

I didn't see any suggestions, only insults. Well, that's totally true. The Real Squeal suggested notifying the audience first and then igniting them. That would be pussy as that would remove all of the surprise.

Our last band, Fistfuck, used to take fat people out of the audience and beat them up on stage. The first couple of times we did it people thought it was staged. But then it hit the papers and people found out that the pain was real. After that we only managed to do it one more time before having to move to another town.

you belong in hell

so you see, when you start a topic by insulting many people, they will insult you back. But i dont think there is a way to light your audience on fire without warning them. Unless its gasoline-soaked-asbestos suit night. In which case you're in luck. otherwise i would still recommend the corpse thing... or set yourself on fire, if you want to rip-off Rammstein... just not plausable. Try to incorporate Sterno into your act somewhere, that stuff is good for everything. Eat bats heads, and spray the audience with blood. Then cut your hair on stage, set that on fire, and ventilate the whole place with the smell. Get a stack of wooden chairs and just start breaking them over peoples backs. Get your penis peirced on stage, and have a specially made stud that shoots sparks when you jerk off. Make a seagull in a cage eat bread soaked in seltzer so it blows up. Write a novel, while throwing pasta sauce into the air where a trained monkey dangles by a rope which electrifies whenever you finish a chapter. then kill yourself.

Thinking again.. maybe if you give them the fuel and lighters they'll set themselves on fire

Where do you play next I'll gladly be the fat guy to come up on stage. Has your band ever had an enema with a drum set? I think it's funny how it takes your whole band to beat up one person, how manly and cool of you. I get pretty rowdy, I've never been the baddest person at any music show I've been to, but one of the most motivated. Your band is probably made up of the type of people that think they are the baddest in a pit and end up getting carried out. Because somebody like me picked them up, threw them into their other buddies, and stomped each one repeatedly in the head and throat. Oops, I have badSHIT on my shoes, that's what stinks.

Yeah, bring the shit on BadSHit...I get rowdier than The Real, he gets scared of me...He bounces me into the pit and has to claw me out of it before i chop throats..

Oh man! There is nothing funnier than reading shit from a couple of guys trying to tell me how rough and tough they are when they are hanging out in the pit. I'd love to see you two hanging out at one of our shows. The crowd would tear you apart and leave you peeing on yourselves in a corner.
I'll let you know where we will be playing next and I hope you two can make it. We should be playing in about three weeks.

Why don't you post it. I might be interested in attending with a dozen or so friends.

I would never come to your show, cuz I'll bet the music sucks, and the crowd all suck.
But I can mosh pretty damn rough for my age.

I'll bring my crew badShit...We'll make your pussy poser crowd shutter and wince at our antics...
Hell, I doubt you have a band...You are full of shit. What do you play? Probably the skin flute and kazoo with the senior citzens at the old folks home.
I want some proof you have a band.

BWA HAH HAH HAH (echo fades in the distance...)

Yeah I've partied with some Windsor Canadians, they were cool as hell.

The only people afraid of Clown Unit at concerts are people wearing sandals, weary that his big fat, drunk ass, will step on their toes.

Badshit, I'd have you're crowd turned into bloody wall flowers. Little unconscious dope up puking pieces of shit, crying for mama. You and your band would be disgusted in awe after you recieve a fender strat eneman and drum stick catheterization. Aryian people are pussies when confronted or challenged, all of them are. They only hide behing dwindling numbers, I'll show up alone.

Man, this will be one hell of a good show! I can't wait for all you mouthy little fucks to show up!

Heya BADshit... been looking thru all of yer posts and you seem like yer a real intelligent fella... howzabout you post some of your bands lyrics up on the page, i'd really luv ta see what you guys come up with.....

Chrome