I had a very disturbing dream the other night. I've been turning it over in my head, trying to figure it out.

I was with one of my best friends, cooking up a shot of heroin for him. That in itself is disturbing. For one, he's a total straightedge. No drugs, period. He's cool with what I do, and I respect his choices. Second, anything involving a needle is waaayy on the other side of my "Do not even think about touching" line.

It was his first time, and I got the impression that it was me who had convinced him to try it. I even helped him through it, explaining how to make sure he'd hit a vein.

And he did it.

I don't have any memory of happiness. I only saw him broken. He was a zombie. Lifeless, morose, just gone. I practically had to drag him along. I had helped him destroy himself.

There are so many reasons that this dream was so troubling. I care about my friend, and seeing him like that was a bit frightening. Knowing that I was the one responsible was just as bad. I simply can't imagine that happening, and I certainly can't see myself pushing him towards anything like that.

I know that shooting up once won't instantly turn someone into a strung-out junkie. I'm smarter than that. It would seem that somewhere inside, though, I'm more afraid of such a thing than I've ever admitted.

I realize that this might not really fit here. I can't really think of anywhere else to put it, though. It's a bit too personal for Spurious. If a mod feels it's inappropriate, I'll understand. I would ask that you just close it, rather than move it somewhere else. I may close it myself after I've had some time to reflect.

Thanks for listening.

A potential interpretation: you will soon be facing a decision which has the potential to lead your friend down this path. Maybe he will be leaning towards trying something. The intensity of heroin with a needle could be a subconscious exaggeration - the subconscious tends to get to the point. In this case, I would try to be very aware of what I'm doing for the next few days. I would make it a point to pay full attention to the consequences of my actions BEFORE I make them.

Dreams are very personal - I'm just speculating. If you're looking for some further interpretation, try Science of the Damned.

quote:

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A potential interpretation: you will soon be facing a decision which has the potential to lead your friend down this path. Maybe he will be leaning towards trying something. The intensity of heroin with a needle could be a subconscious exaggeration - the subconscious tends to get to the point. In this case, I would try to be very aware of what I'm doing for the next few days. I would make it a point to pay full attention to the consequences of my actions BEFORE I make them.

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i don't believe in dreams connecting with the future in ANY way, but [to paraphrase some freud] "dreams are the acting of a subconscious wish -good or bad-"
[but i do agree with grib when he says that the heroine could be an subconscious exaggeration (though whether or not your dream is about drugs in your life is something you have to figure out, your subconscious could be masking another decision as a drug decision in your dream)]
you may be troubled about this friend [or another friend] trying or doing [harder] drugs. or worried about making a decision yourself [friend or no friend]
or worried about how drugs affect your own [or others'] life.
dream interpretations are NEVER fully accurate, the best way to deal with your dream would be to come up with your own conclusion; and then do something about it.

we're having a lot of dream discussion lately, aren't we?