So last night while hanging with some friends that were on E I took a quarter ounce of mushrooms and some benzos. I'm wondering if anyone else around here has had a similar experience with the high dose mushy ride. This was my second high dose trip and the first time scared the shit out of me. I'm kinda loopy in that I spontaneously do stupid balls to the wall shit like that. I don't let bad experiences frighten me.

I experienced a total ego dissolution just as I did the other time. I felt like I was permanently schitzophrenic, yet at peace with it this time as my observer "knew" I was going to get back eventually. I had some crazy thoughts about why I do chemicals, and some weird paranoid thoughts about some of my closest friends. I also became stuck thinking about suicide, not like I was depressed(I've been there before) but more sort of some detached fascination with mortallity. Good thing my subconscious clings to life tenaciously.


I left my friends for a while and tried to go to sleep, ha ha ha, that was futile. I closed my eyes and it was so bright I couldn't bear it, hard to explain but I'm sure most of you know what kind of stuff I was seeing. So by now it's 4-5 o'clock(am) and my friends notice my trouble, they suggest going for a walk down to the store(the sev). I reluctantly agree. Well It just snowed about 5 inches and it was 15 below, so it was quite the trek, we brought a camera(that will be interesting to see) and were bundled up like an arctic expidition. Crossing the highway was fun, tractor trailer rigs are pretty imposing when stoned out of your mind.

I also kept thinking about my car and my job and how I was going to accomplish all the short term goals I've been working on. I pondered over the miraculous nature of chemistry(my true passion) Strangely I didn't think about school at all.

Whew I made it! It was revealing, and deeply helpful. Nothing like a psychadelic experience to give you a kick in the pants.

I'd be very interested to hear others experiences.

later,
tryptic


[This message has been edited by tryptamine (edited 01-20-2002).]

while tripping hard on shroom i thought i pick up peoples trash on a small planet flying through space. and how much i don't matter. then i remembered that it was a cool thing seeing my childrens teeth come in then they lose thier baby teeth then they got new ones and i'm alive to see it. very cool.

Grrrrr damnit tryp. u got that fucking song stuck in my head.....