hey i know most of you have asked a guy/girl out for a date but when you got turned down how did you cope with it? i don't need people saying oh yeah why not go rape her or go kill her and then rape her or meh i could care less


because the truth is if you could care less you don't really love this person and you don't deserve em

me i got turned down by a girl who i have been talking with and hangin out with for since december 31 2001 i finally got up the nerve last night to ask her out (this is about 3 weeks after she dumped my best friend) and shes like "Not now LATER" im like say this again im like what then shes like i don't want to go out with you right now maybe some other time and im like holy shit i got shot and burnt and im like woo this is new and i ain't like those other people that say oh i will kill my self if i don't get her or i will kill her and rape her or any of that shit i just want her to be happy even as hard as it is if its not with me but man it hurts and i just want to know how you guys got over the pain

well i think we have a case of bigwankeritus.

just kidding. good luck on you i guess. dont hound her and just ask her if she ever wants to be with you.

if not go to backyard ballistics and find out how to blow her fucking house up.

i know you go there alot anyway, huh.

Well here it is, like what I said to chiki or some other guy earlier, be her best friend, and be loved like a brother. Sadly this had to happen to you, perhaps she really likes you too much as someone who she can casually hang around and be friends with instead of a lover. Only time will tell if she will ever like you in that way, but I think you have a chance. From my point of view, I think she might be mixed thoughts such as shock from braking up, thinking you want to take advantage of her from the brakeup, being turned off by guys for a while(its a popular excuse, but who knows...), or just plain not interested(sorry).

If i were you, I would continue to be her friend. Try to be cool about the situation and don't go crazy over this one little thing. Many things could have been the reason for what happened, but if you keep trying, maybe you will succeed. I wouldnt just ask her out again, but instead take her out someplace like you would before this happened. Don't make her think that by saying what she said she lost a friend. That is by far the worst you can do.

Well that is all I can say, but would you mind telling me how close you were to her before this? Like if guys go out and have fun, or are you two just people who will say hi to eachother when walking down the street?

The easiest way to get over it is to shrug your shoulders and accept her decision, then get back to being her friend. She knows how you feel, you know how she feels. It is how it is, so handle the situation accordingly.

I should note that most girls eventually (sometimes often) have to deal with guy friends who show an interest in them. Some of those girls then aren't comfortable even being friends with the guy anymore, but most of them have no problems with it- if you show you have no problems with it either. They'll probably appreciate a guy who can handle a no and not let it alter the friendship that was already in effect.

quote:

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Originally posted by CDG:
but would you mind telling me how close you were to her before this? Like if guys go out and have fun, or are you two just people who will say hi to eachother when walking down the street?

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i think the problem was we knew each other to well and we just rushed into things like me and her (sad to say) actually talk on the phone like min 2 hours a day so we pretty much have covered every thing there possibily could go over in every possible way likes dislike sexual experiance sexual pleasures ect..

If you guys were talking 2 hours on the phone a day, sharing sexual experiences, and telling stories of how eachother is pleased, WHAT HAPPENED!!! Honestly, from seeing you post that, I beleive you should try to ask her out again, in a different enviorment perhaps, somewhere she feels more confortable.

Also from what you posted, you seem to know her very well, well enough that you can use that knowledge to get her to like you. But then again, doing so can backfire very easily. If you are in love with her, as in you cant live without her, then play it safe and just take the entire thing slow. However, if you just like her alot, but not enough to die over, then use your friendship for all its worth. Being great friends with a girl should, and I think does, give you a distinct advantage.

Warweed12, sounds to me like a done deal. You just have to be there and wait for her to feel she's ready to start another relationship. May take a few weeks, may take a few months... serriously though, sounds like you're practically going out already anyway.

If she did go out with you at this point:

If she dumped your mate, then it would like she just decided to take you over him (making her umm... yes.)

If he dumped her, then it would like she was just desperate and going out with you get back at him / because she's in shock etc. That would be cheapeing any feeling she does have for you.

Perhaps then she just doesn't want people talking? Or she doesn't want you to feel she's going out with you for any reason other thent hat she likes / loves you.

Anyway sit it out, try again when you feel its ready. If she says no again tell her its her turn to ask next time. If you're friends it should work I think. Then again I wouldn;t pretend to know. (shrug)

Good luck mate,

Magician

I couldn't read that. Hotly fucking Christ on a stick with horseraddish.

thanks you guys i think i shall wait a little while and try again later i think shes still kinda upset about dumping my friend (yes she dumped him) but i shall wait a little longer and ask again thanks you guys you have really been a help