...Grow up. Heh.

Most of the people who post here with problems with relationships are teens going out on their first date, so I'm going to address this to you.

There is no mystery about the other sex. They're a person just like you. Treat them like you'd like to be treated.

You see a hot chick? Go up and talk to her. Doesn't matter what. Just make it interesting to her. Compliment her if you can't think of any other ice breaker. Compliments work.

See a hot guy? Catch his eye. Twirl your hair. Smile out of the corner of your mouth. If he keeps looking but doesn't come over, go over to him. Doesn't matter what you say. Just say hi and start talking.

There. Meeting people is easy. If you think someone is flirting with you, assume they are. You'll make a fool of yourself sometimes, but so does everyone. No one remembers the guy or girl who hit on them when they weren't interested... Unless they did something really odd like pulled down their pants or something...

Ok, guys? Boiled down, life is simple. We grow, we eat, we fuck, we die. We repeat. Stop caring if you make an idiot of yourself. People like idiots, actually. They find dopey people cute and ammusing(I'm talking to the guys especially).

So there. Be you, do what you want. Stop worrying if she does or doesn't like you. Stop worrying if he will or won't call. Just chill.

There should be two forums for sex. Beginners and Advanced.

Maybe Suzie could set it up?

rofl, I'll see what I can do..

What advice are beginners supposed to offer beginners? I just dont even click the gay ass obvious15 year old threads.

That's the point. Segregation.

I find replying to those threads fun, but then again, im 14 :-(

I'll give kids as much advice as they need... But the whole meeting people is so simple that it isn't a mystery.

I just wanted to post that so they'd read it and stop asking about meeting her at the pool, or whatever the hell else they need.

Now on to talking about eating poo in submission!

Heh speaking of the pool one, that was rather stupid. I beleive we should have a sort of FAQ, where we address simple things as how to aproach women, what to say as your first word. Better yet, have a printable version where it can be folded into a handy card :-)

How about this...

"Hello my name is [your name here]. Your [compliment here]." *begin conversation*

Yes, and for example:
Hi, my name is CDG, I think your boobs are very nice, and i just can't help but stare at them. Do you have a name for the twins, or can I personally name them for you? Oh and just incase you are wondering, im a kid that has no social life and hangs around a message board every day and attempts to be popular around my internet buddies who consume me entirely. Oh no! looks like some guy deserves a AIM nuking!

With regard to what i just said, i doubt most people here are even serious when they post things like the "pool" thread. I think they might just be lying and trying to gain reconition and popularity.

I wrote an faq about penises. It's great. It tells you how to measure it and everything.

Mind if I use that CDG?

My penis has magical powers of flight. You just wouldn't know because the rest of my body doesn't float...

The beauty of this attempt to help the kids is that within 48 hours, at least one new post asking for help on this very topic will likely be up.

By the way, kids, remember- the worse you look, the better your line needs to be. Either that, or start working out.

>>>>>>>>>Ok, guys? Boiled down, life is simple. We grow, we eat, we fuck, we die. We repeat.<<<<<<

repeat?


subliminal bhuddishm....

Hinduism, pussy. Don't forget Hinduism.

Z3m, every time I read a post from you on the subject of sex, I can't help thinking about it in a Barry White/Chef type voice.

Now we have the 'kids' post...

Hellooooo, children, Z3m would like to sing you a little song...

You aren't a big, black, medallion-wearer, are you?

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Aloha.
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Nah. I don't like wearing big, black medallions.

he doesn't sound like barry white either.

huh? what?

Heh, this has got to be the best thread I've read in a while. Sums up just about everyone and everything posted here on this forum.

Oh, very droll, Z.

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Aloha.
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I know. I sound like I've no testicles at all.

Chest wig?

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Aloha.
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I usualy stick to the following approach when picking up women at the pool...be as complimentary as possible even if its b.s. make it up!!!!and always remember to repeat it, remember, repeat it in as many different angles as imaginable...just so they don't forget don't forget because I seem to have that problem, or was it someone else? Also, never look at their reaction to you because it might cause you to get confused and contradict yourself. the next step is that they usually act irritated but don't worry it means they like you. 'cause why would you be doing all this if you just wanted them to stay away from you?

alice? celena used to tell me about how the pain in your hands was caused by guilt about sexualy molesting her. fuck is that ever stupid sounding...when she wasn't doing that she was picking worms from celenas ass.

of course i also heard you paid money for ativan. i think its bullshit

hi i'm a junkie and i'm typical and easy to flame. its not funny its fucken sad i also fucked a dog and a horse would be fine too .. but i wouldn't touch you. threw away my last meth yesterday afternoon and been twitchen ever since. i speak it means nothing i jump through your hoops and try to play your games but i always lose. another minute has just gone by without meth and i'm gonna make it through the next one.

yer also talking to yourself.

I think we need more topics like the one that Z3m just wrote, thats good advice.

Shut up.

HAHA, im kidding

z3m you sound more like a female the way you fucking carry on. *smacks z3m an puts him under pimp arrest*

I should beat my girl friends, eh Max? 'Cause then I won't give them orgasms for 4 years I'm with them, huh?

*coughpatheticcough*

lol, what the hell was that?

never mind, you don't wanna know.

you gotta beat them cheeks sometimes, they call me the "handyman"

Is that why they leave you for me?