i'm still a virgin . . . i'll be 18 on june 4th. am i a loser or what?

you still havent accepted the fact that the common definition of virgin is one who has never been involved with another person sexually. thats your twisted definition. and what does virginity have to do with relationships? absolutly nothing, virginity describes whether or not a person has had a sexual experience not whether they have had anything to do with a relationship.

allright. I'm tired of all this bullshit 'virgin to a new partner' shit. You look it up in any dicitionary, it says 'a person who has not had sexual intercourse'. If youve fuck before, you ain't a virgin any more. just face the fuckin' facts.

Alone- How old are you if you don't mind me asking??
You say the only thing holding you back is the worry bout getting pregnant & the risk of catching diseases?
There are thousands of ways that you can avoid getting pregnant!!

Hi Mr. Spiffy: No, I don't think it is twisted logic so much as a new, refreshing, and somewhat more meaningful concept of "virginity". And Mister Rat and Syphon, OF COURSE I am not using YOUR dictionary!! I am not defining "virgin" in a literal, guilt-filled, victorian way, but rather in the SPIRIT of the word. It is not a meaningful word in the context of PENETRATION. It is a very meaningful word in the context of RELATIONSHIPS. So if the guy has never made love to the girl before, she IS a "virgin" (ie, she is a "first=timer") as to HIM. That's not "twisted". Using my definition, the girl who has just made a new guy to her happy, would remain a "virgin". That is an accurate, non-judgemental positive, spiritual, and loving concept. Using your "dictionary" definition makes the same girl a tarnished, guilt-ridden, second class lover. Thank you RAT and SYPHON, but--usng my definition-- I find MY WORLD a better place than YOURS. Love, Venus.

I'm 17 and still a virgin. I have no qualms about whther or not I'm mentally or physically ready for it, however, I'm sure that 17 is too young. For one thing, 99% of the populace IS too immature to see sex for what it really is, and secondly at 17 one is not economically mature. If you're going to take a risk like sex is thses days (what with std, pregnancy and all) you sure as hell better be prepared incase you (no pun intended) screw up.

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Originally posted by pretty pinay:
Using your "dictionary" definition makes the same girl a tarnished, guilt-ridden, second class lover.

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Much as I think you're the only person who believes a girl can repeatedly be a virgin for each guy she sleeps with, I also believe you're probably the only person here who considers this to be the case.

Maybe back in the 50's this was true. Now? Most people don't give a fuck. Maybe it's different there, but for the majority of the people you're talking to, whether a girl's a virgin by our definition or not really doesn't matter for shit. I know plenty of people- not just girls, this is the same for both genders- who have had sex; none consider themselves virgins in any way, with anyone, and not one of them has the slightest pang of guilt about it. No one considers them tarnished or a second-class lover unless they're terrible in bed- a distinction which more often than not goes to the less-experienced.

Hey, if you need to think this way to be content with how you do things, okay. I'm not gonna sit here and say you're wrong to do so, because that's a personal judgment call. But what it really sounds like is that you're hung up on the idea that "virgin = good", and the same goes for approximately no one else here. Like I said, maybe it's way different there. If that's what everyone thinks, that virgins are somehow better than non-virgins, okay. But your definitions are gonna crash harder than a ValuJet around the rest of us because we don't believe that's true.

Hi again Spiffy: As usual, you make sense. Now I understand. It IS a cultural thing. Where I am it still has a lot of stigma attached if you are not a "virgin" when a girl gets married--(worse yet, even a child born out of wedlock is called "illigitimate"). All of this is of course stupid. As a matter of fact, very VERY few girls here (probably just like where you are) are "virgins" by the dictionary definition by the time they get married. But they still hold themselvew out as virgins so long as they have been able to keep it a secret. The problem is that girls find it difficult to keep it a secret, because every jilted BF makes sure the whole village knows that he had sex with her. So thank you, Spiffy for clarifying it. Here the issue might be like it was in the '50s where you are!! Therefore, what I should have said in my previous post was NOT that my using my definition of "virgin" makes my world a better place than yours. I SHOULD have said instead that using my definition of "virgin" makes MY place a better place than it would otherwise be. Thanks to you, I've got the understanding and it's cleared up for me now. Love, Venus.

I lost mine to at the age of 16, it was great and I don�t regret it one bit.

im 15

I realize that there are many ways to prevent pregnancy, but they are all never 100% safe and even if they are 99% sure, knowing my luck i would be the 1%...

maybe i just think too much

But what ways are there to prevent besides birth control and condoms?