Likes me back, but wont go out with me, but wants to go far with me...

Normally, someone would want this, but for some reason, I'de rather be able to call her my gf, instead of 'the girl next door.'

She came to a party I was at on sat. There were some drugs and alcohol, etc. And when the time came that my friends wanted me to 'toke' with them I said no, and stayed with the foxy lady. And I guess it made her go crazy for me. And that night...um, we didn't get any sleep. But now I sorta regret it that I can't call her my gf.

Is it possible that I've found some one that just wants some action and not a relationship.

duh, yes, it's possible. not everyone wants relationships all the time, but we all have the same "urges" ya know?

Could this urge be more than an impulse.

Mabey something that she would want to continue?

Who knows.. I mean, yeah, friends with benefits happens.. but don't expect a relationship

bud benifits would be nice if they last but that seldom happens. she will probably get a bf and stop playing with you. unless of course you develop a relationship as suz said but i doubt it will happen because she didnt want it before sex. just being a friend may prolong it but most of all just talk to her.

*roar*

[This message has been edited by a wild hyena on ritalin with human remains in his mouth(edited 02-12-2002).]

I would rather have a gf.2 weeks ago i think about the January 27th I asked out an angel.Her name was Emma.She is great.We love eachother sooo fucking much.Its a great feeling.I am actually happy now, def no girl next door.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
dont mention jan 27
thats the day my baby got thieved
i cried and thats no shit i loved her guess no more bmx till i get insurance
well that bike was worth bout $1200
damn i loved it

quote:

---

Originally posted by Wintermute:
duh, yes, it's possible. not everyone wants relationships all the time, but we all have the same "urges" ya know?

---

Stop reading my mind, Suzie!

Dank.

heh

And stop sticking your tongue out at my confusion! You're horrible, Suzie!

Dank.

I know, I'm just utterly devoid of unhorrible ness or something..

Tell me something I don't know, Suz! You're so tactless.

I'm depressed now. Everytime I think about it, images and thoughts run through my head. Like things I would have said. What I would have done different. And now I think that it could have been just a one-night thing. And that tears me apart.

Why couldn't I just say something like "before we go any farther, would you be my girlfriend" or something like that.

Shit I hate myself now! I feal so unclean. And now she probably doesn't ever remember...

A few weeks ago, our friends hooked up and tried to push me and her to get together. But I hesitated to make sure what I felt was real, and not an impulse. I thought that our night together could be IT, our friends are since broken up, and it only lasted like two weeks. I chose not to ask her out then because I saw this coming, and if we were together, the burden we be between usto do something about their relationship.

It would have wrecked it all.

I need something to help me get away from it all. To many questions, not enough answers. I wish I could go away. Take me and my grief away from my friends and family, let them free of me...nothing can help now.

I need therapy...I lied to my last therapist about everything, she was a fool, I fooled her. She said I was the most 'normal' client she had.

I'm disturbed!

look, im no psychologist but i think that there is an answer here.

You obviuosly like this girl enough to be thinking about her all the time but if she liked you enough to go out with you, by now u would be going out with her.

If she doesn't like you enough to go out with you and only have a "one nighter" then she must like you for your sex-appeal but maybe she doesn't see you as a boy-friend.

If this is the case then there is not much you can do, but if she did go out with you, what kind of relationship would it be?

It wouldnt be that good because she doesnt like you enough and so it would be very awkward.

You seem like a nice guy so i think that you should go out there, find another girl or let one find you, after all if you know that she found you, u know that she likes you for who you are.

A lot of people get into relationships based on physical attraction and then it ends very quickly due to the lack of things u have in common. Whereas if you got to know the girl first and let her get to know you, the relationship would be better and last longer.

(this is what i did with my current girlfriend and we are very happy)

but while u r getting to know her u discover she's not right for you. move on.

I think that this girl you like know is not right for you and you should forget about her and try to get her out of your life so you can concentrate on other things and wait untill you find some-one who you would enjoy sending time with.

I hope i was of some help.

-------------------
G



[This message has been edited by SLANT g Rhythm (edited 02-12-2002).]

the best way to get over this is to start fucking someone else before she does. that way you wont be as heartbroken cuz you have a backup ass to take your frustrations out on. just dont get attached to the second chick, cuz that one is your lust puppy. you want to date the first chick, but she wont go out with you, so eventually shell stop fucking you and get with a dood she wants to go out with. this will leave you sad and confused. if you have a backup youll feel better. then you can quit fucking the backup when your stable again and go out looking for a chick you wanna date. dont make a g/f out of the second chick (the back up) cuz relationships based on sex are best left at that. dont make a ho a housewife type shit.

Junglist...c'mon...I mean, I'm laughin', kinda. But...hahahhahahaaaa! Calm down, that's not like you, is it?!

Dank.

i get home from work and you're still standing in your dressing gown well what am i to do?

what are we coming to??

quote:

---

Originally posted by junglist:
the best way to get over this is to start fucking someone else before she does. that way you wont be as heartbroken cuz you have a backup ass to take your frustrations out on. just dont get attached to the second chick, cuz that one is your lust puppy. you want to date the first chick, but she wont go out with you, so eventually shell stop fucking you and get with a dood she wants to go out with. this will leave you sad and confused. if you have a backup youll feel better. then you can quit fucking the backup when your stable again and go out looking for a chick you wanna date. dont make a g/f out of the second chick (the back up) cuz relationships based on sex are best left at that. dont make a ho a housewife type shit.

---

That is exactly not what to do.
For all we know this could be what this girl is doing to him and look what kind of effect its had on him.

Look mate, ignore junglist, doing that would make things worse and would not be nice on the "back up". I still think that my idea would be better for everyone (not because i posted it but because it would be better for everyone, not just yourself) and that things like this take time.

be patient after all, good things come to those who wait.

Good luck

---------------
G

I gotta be honest i only read the top post. You sound like someone a girl was talking to me about. You don't work in the Galleria in Hatfield do you? Cause you're situation sounds very familiar. This is what the girl said. She said she got realy drunk and fucked some guy she workd with but doesn't actually like him. Now he wants to be her B/F but she doesn't like him.

Otherwise good luck man. You could just kinda ride it out. Give her a few weeks to come round or impress her. Get a few girls to be on your arms next time you see her to make her jelous. Make her feel that she's missed the best chance of her life. You can probably get some pretty impressive bitches by just talking to everyone. Then meet her with two fit birds, one on each arm. A girl once said to me that the best thing a man can have is confidence. So chill man. If she just wants sex then her personality isn't that good and she's too shallow so fuck her but don't think about it too much.

Chris

Didn't that make a lot of sense?

no it didnt

a relationship based on jealousy will not work.

quote:

---

Originally posted by dankgirl420:
Junglist...c'mon...I mean, I'm laughin', kinda. But...hahahhahahaaaa! Calm down, that's not like you, is it?!

Dank.

---

nah, not really, i just like to provide the opinions of your stereotypical 23 year old college dood. i dont really act like that, i tend to keep one chick around for extended periods of time, my man whore meter is really low, actually. but i live with a chick thats not my g/f so i like to act like that just to give her shit, and so it comes out sometimes. alot of the situations on the board remind me of shit that i hear at home listenin to her and her crew , and these are the things that i say to them. they can be quite the soap opera crew at the right time. and i can be quite the asshole, but its not really how i feel, just for kicks. but if someone takes me seriously then way to go. ive tried to just have chicks around and not have relationships but somewhere it always turns into one. but not with the hos, with a chick i cant nail after a party.

howd we start talkin about me?

and fuck slant g whatever, he thinks you have to treat all chicks like your mom. sometimes its good to just have a ho around for a few weeks, i say live it up! have wild sex and when its over masturbate to it in the shower.

see what i mean dank??

What "back-up ass"? This isn't about me. It's about you, Junglist!

Dank.

im talking about serious relationships here, not a quick fuck then a taxi home. Ghetto_smurf has described that he has had the sex but wants a relationship so i am telling him how to get one.
If he wanted a quick fuck he would carry on with what he's doing. (try reading the first post again junglist) but thats not what he wants.
Get it junglist?

-----------
sLANT

so you have some vulcan mind trick that he could use to change her mind? im giving him a reasonable solution to the reality that the chick doesnt want him as a boyfriend. acting like a wuss isnt going to get a chick to like you. acting like a man might.

and i didnt mean like that dank, i meant get that im just acting like an ass for my own amusement (or anyone else who enjoys watching me ba an ass) and that i dont really think that way.

and im not trying to give you shit personally, ghetto smurf. im providing suggestions that havent been explored yet.

I'm thinking of getting her a dozen red roses, and a little something else...for valentine's day. Would that be a good gesture?

Mabey I should give up on her. I'm so confuzed right now. I want to call her and ask if she thinks we should take the first steps into a relationship, but I don't want to scare her.

It's been too long of a single life for me. Mabey I'm rushing things.
...

*We didn't get hammered at this party*
*We were the only ones NOT drinking*
...

If we've had our 'time' together, what would the next step be? Could it be that we've skipped too many steps to attempt building something? What if there was something crucial that we missed?

I need time with her. I haven't seen her since the party. I don't know what she is thinking about. Or even if the thought has crossed her mind.

I thought it would have been the perfect time to 'make my move.' Her friends were stoked outta their minds to hear that I was going to ask her. I was so positive that she would say yes. Positive that she felt the same way I did. I might be wrong...

the fear of rejection is a bitch. but you never get anything without taking risks...

if you fail at least you can say you tried, if you never try youll ask yourself what could have been, and probably dream up something in your head about how it would have been even though you have no clue. then youll feel worse because youll be envisioning this perfect situation with her that you missed out on. whether or not it would have really happened.

quote:

---

Originally posted by junglist:
the fear of rejection is a bitch. but you never get anything without taking risks...

if you fail at least you can say you tried, if you never try youll ask yourself what could have been, and probably dream up something in your head about how it would have been even though you have no clue. then youll feel worse because youll be envisioning this perfect situation with her that you missed out on. whether or not it would have really happened.

---

I completely agree.

But the point i was trying to get across is not that you should try and change her mind by acting like a wuss. but to forget about her and find someone else.

But again, junglist's last post is completely right, take note.

-------------
sLANT

I bought her a necklace. I do this every time. I hate my heart. Fuck.

I just spent like $50 on her, and I'm not even going out with her yet. Dammit. Mabey I should call her. I'm so scared. WHat if she takes it the wrong way. I can't reach her today so it'll have to be a belated valentine's gift. I'm such a procrastinator. (sp?)

I need to talk to her...I fear that if I don't soon, then she'll let me go. I don't want to let her go. I don't want to lose her.

*What's that word called when you don't give up?*

Does not giving up work on a female? Is there are chance that she'd would see someting in that?

I know I've had my share of relationships, but it feals like I'm a newbie to all of this. Like my mind has forgotten everything?

[This message has been edited by GHETTO_SMURF (edited 02-15-2002).]

There's no set thing as to what works or doesn't..
sorry to tell ya that

look, do you know any of her friends?

If you do, (or even if you don't) get talking to one of her friends and see what they have to say.

They could tell you what she'd like and if she likes you etc.

Other than that, im starting to run out of idea's.

Good luck

------------
sLANT

ok, now youre acting like a wuss and its not even to impress her with your sensativity.

just do it. but id hold off on the necklace, you dont want her to just feel bad because you bought her this and give you charity attention. you dont want her to feel bad for you, you want her to respect you and like you for who you are. you cant base a relationship on pity.

just fucking call her and be like, so we've been hanging out alot, and ive enjoyed myself.... you take it from there.

if she says she doesnt like you like that, try to get in her pants and then return the necklace. if she does, then give her the nacklace and tell her its a belated valentines day present, and ask her to be your belated valentine.

Would it be possible to get an update Ghetto_smurf?

You need to just do it.

Really, girlfriends aren't worth the effort... Find a ho who'll do you for a #3 at Wendy's.

yeh, i called her..we talked, she came over for some hot-tubbin'

we sat...were goin out
i gave her, her necklace, she loved it, she was speechless

i guess i shouldn't have waited so long...

Thats good to hear man.

Have a good time

--------------
G

thnx man!

... yeah. Well done mate.

So what if the girl just wants sex? Is it fair to say it's not normal for a female to want something every guy wants AND gets away with!?!?

i hate to say this..but i think that females make the rules..and guys just hope to catch a break!

What the FUCK are you complaining about??

okay, you have a girl who obviously you care about, and are sexually attracted to. She probably feels the same. You can still be with her, even though she's not your g/f.

GET OVER IT!!!

No one ever appreciates how fucking great it is being single until you're in a relationship. You can do whatever you want, with whoever you want.

And hey, once you get even closer to each other, there's nothing saying that maybe you'll both just become official...so...have your fun, son.

But I AM going out with her! We both called it. And it's going pretty damm good, and I hope it continues to go good for a long time.