Original thread here: http://www.totse.com/community/showthread.php?t=2176784


Here's something I forgot: being sober is boring.

Television is boring. Reading is boring. Playing video games is boring. Hanging out with friends is boring.

All the normal things that normal people would normally enjoy are, in reality, quite boring. Atrociously boring.

Here's something else I forgot: I can't turn my brain off, even to go to sleep. All I do is think-- which some people might find appealing, but I assure you it isn't fun.

The other night I thought about how to create a peer-to-peer neural network that used wikipedia as a word association database so that a computer could adequately write a basic--but convincing--plot (for MMORPGS, not War and Peace). I sat and thought about it and stared at the wall from ten o'clock at night until four in the morning, then went to bed and woke up at seven. I've been doing this pretty much every day I go without drinking, though the obsession changes with the day. The point is, nothing I think about is actually practical or productive, and ends up making life in the normal world harder to bear.

Oh yeah, that's another thing: work is remarkably boring now that I've stopped the perpetual hangover. I'll be the first to admit, of course, that I don't have the most intellectually stimulating job, but I didn't expect to find things so unbearable. I am absolutely uninterested in anything that has to do with the chimp-work I've been dealing with my whole life. Not drinking has strangely made me a less dedicated worker rather than a better one. I want nothing to do with this bullshit [working] world, honestly.

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Anything good? Sure, a bit.

I get shit done. I actually meet deadlines (at least the few that I have). Laundry doesn't count.

While at first I felt horrible the day(s) after not drinking anything, I'm starting to feel better in the morning now.

Obviously, my stomach is *much* less irratable now. I'm actually kind of surprised on that one, at least in such a short time-frame.

I'm spending less money. I drink less, and therefore smoke less. I'm estimating, but I'm spending about $8.00 a day less than I was previously. Oh yeah, I'm better at chess. Not much, but it's noticeable.

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Difficulties? A multitude.

As mentioned, I can't turn my brain off. I always had this problem before, so I guess it isn't a surprise that it's happening again. I just wish I could go to sleep half of the time.

Being around people makes me want to drink... and a lot of the time, I do. To be honest, I get bored or annoyed with people overall when I'm sober... and sometimes both. I have a hard time dealing with any social experience, even in my own house, without drinking. I don't care if the other people drink, but to deal with them I am compelled to do so myself.

That's all for now folks. Time for some sleeping pills.

I just wanted to say props for conducting this, something I could probably do.

Here's something I forgot: being sober is boring. .

Specially if your dirt fucking poor, and have creepy little sausage fingers, and have nothing going for you.


Enjoy, first class only for jew!

Being sober does indeed suck. I've been driving myself nuts with nothing to do, and I've become a complete loner and a nervous wreck.

I feel for you. Once you abuse for a long time it's hard to go back to normal life. Good job on your experiment though.

Life is generally average without chemical stimulation. Not good or shit, just existence. That's how it probably will be forever, as that's what got us this far evolutionarily.

That's unless you take hedonism to the extreme and constantly take sustainable drugs/supplements, such as JP's combo. If you look at life logically, this is actually a very good idea. A lot of people don't seem to have any logic though...

Being around people makes me want to drink... and a lot of the time, I do. To be honest, I get bored or annoyed with people overall when I'm sober... and sometimes both. I have a hard time dealing with any social experience, even in my own house, without drinking. I don't care if the other people drink, but to deal with them I am compelled to do so myself.

I definitely get what you're going through, I feel the same way about ALOT of people. Either they are really stupid, naive, or just condescending assholes. I can tell within the first few minutes of meeting someone which category they could fall in, and it makes it hard to have many close friends, I guess my standards are high?

Was it like that for you before the experiment? (The bold)

^ That's certainly my aim.

Maybe I should take a career as a rockstar...

I definitely get what you're going through, I feel the same way about ALOT of people. Either they are really stupid, naive, or just condescending assholes. I can tell within the first few minutes of meeting someone which category they could fall in, and it makes it hard to have many close friends, I guess my standards are high?

Was it like that for you before the experiment? (The bold)

I felt the same mostly, just not as strongly as I do now.

shit man after feeling what its like to have an altered mindstate and getting used to it of course a normal mindstate is going to seem boring. I feel the same but not to your extent. What it comes down to is that you have to give it time and shit will get better once you get used to being sober

Did you reduce your alcohol gradually or just go cold turkey?

I reduced it at first, failed and started drinking again and now I'm attempting the cold turke approach.

You'll have to pardon me for my ignorance if you've already clearly stated this (my time is limited, so I only managed to scan through your original post about your experiment) but what, roughly (ball park figure) amount of alcohol did you consume each day?

Also this quote (if you don't mind me quoting you) :

"I want to understand the complexities of human behavior, not judge them offhand simply because I do not exhibit the same behavior."

Is quite interesting. I think quite a lot of people would have something to learn from reading that - and that is how I wish more people thought. Interesting, over all.

You'll have to pardon me for my ignorance if you've already clearly stated this (my time is limited, so I only managed to scan through your original post about your experiment) but what, roughly (ball park figure) amount of alcohol did you consume each day?

Well it varied day-to-day but 5-6 bottles of red wine/port was a favourite to keep myself ticking over throughout the day or anything equalling the amount of two litres of cheap vodka is an average I guess. This is of course for the entire day. Some days I'd have more and some days I'd drink until I was out, wake up and repeat.

I was more inclined to drink than to keep measure.

I definitely get what you're going through, I feel the same way about ALOT of people. Either they are really stupid, naive, or just condescending assholes. I can tell within the first few minutes of meeting someone which category they could fall in, and it makes it hard to have many close friends, I guess my standards are high?



You see, a lot of us think like this, including myself. The only thing that has helped me to endure people is to realize that they are enduring me as well. You assume all these things about people you probably hardly know, and even if you know them well, chances are, they're thinking the same sort of shit about you. You're looking upon them with scorn, and they're looking upon you with scorn. You both smile and pretend; this is how society works.

So let me try and understand the situation you have here. You decided to become an alcoholic for 5 years, then you stop, and now your life is shitty. Don't you think your experiment kinda begs the question? I mean only someone with a shitty life would randomly decide to become an alcoholic. Then you became the alcoholic, stopped, and your life is still shitty - 5 years. I don't really understand what has been done here. I guess you could say i don't see what you did there

And that's the thread. Better luck this time Toothless

Television is boring. Reading is boring. Playing video games is boring. Hanging out with friends is boring.

Lets see.
Television is boring - Big surprise there. That said, if you found, and watched shows or movies that relate to your interests it would be different perhaps, although from what you've written I get the feeling you don't have many interests, something that is your own fault really. The world is an incredibly vast place and if you stay in your plain little corner with all the modern conveniences of course its going to get boring.

Reading is boring - Depends on what you read. I mean, its possible you're an imbecile and don't comprehend enough of what you read to be interested in it (like so many people I know) but more than likely you're just reading the wrong books.

Want a book to read? Try Orxy & Crake (Margret Atwood), if you haven't already.



All the normal things that normal people would normally enjoy are, in reality, quite boring. Atrociously boring.
I wouldn't say all, but most are, I agree. Out of curiosity, are you currently in a relationship? Something tells me no.


Here's something else I forgot: I can't turn my brain off, even to go to sleep. All I do is think-- which some people might find appealing, but I assure you it isn't fun.
I have the same problem, and have found it can be cured by smoking low quality weed, you know the sort that makes you burn right the fuck out. Sleeping pills also of course, but they're less healthy.

Its also curable by doing something physical throughout the day. If your body is tired this problem is minimized too, I get the feeling you don't do a lot of physical labour or exercise.

Keep in mind that computer monitors as well as having other close range, bright, fast changing objects in front of you within an hour or two of trying to sleep can prevent it.

As I read on, it seems you're doing this to yourself.
until four in the morning, then went to bed and woke up at seven. I've been doing this pretty much every day I go without drinking
Its simple, if you get into the pattern of not sleeping (intentionally or not) until 4am then you'll stay in this pattern until you break it.

things that cutting drug use has done for me..

1. increased sex drive, more interest in hanging out with girls for more than just drugs (opiates makes me have zero interest in hooking up)

2. better family life, no longer treated like a 10 year old in my own home. family has a little more respect for me and we communicate much healthier

3. more money in my pocket, the ability to do more, not always strapped for cash

4. freedom from addiction, rather than worrying about how i will get my fix tomorrow to prevent getting dope sick and having to ration out doses and wait in the dope spot for hours at a time sometimes when dumb niggas want to bullshit me

5. more interest in things i've always liked- i read more books, i kind of put my guitar and keyboard on the shelf for the year or so i was a bad junkie, now i am playing nearly daily and trying to get a new side project started up.

6. less stress overall, less internal stress, less stress on my mother.

can't think of any more at the moment.

Does being permanently trashed not get boring?

Try it ;).

Try it ;).

Too many fucking Chemistry projects to write up.

And a serious lack of money.

Well it varied day-to-day but 5-6 bottles of red wine/port was a favourite to keep myself ticking over throughout the day or anything equalling the amount of two litres of cheap vodka is an average I guess. This is of course for the entire day. Some days I'd have more and some days I'd drink until I was out, wake up and repeat.

I was more inclined to drink than to keep measure.

Jesus - and like, you experienced no detox symptoms?

Jesus - and like, you experienced no detox symptoms?

Lethargy, depressed mood, anger, rage, nausea, irratation, lack of appetite, increase of appetite, headaches, morning dehydration, night time sweats, insomnia, boredom there's a multitude. Not all bad, not all good.

I feel weird still but that may be my liver having the chance to recuperate.

You know... if you want your mind to stop running around infinity like an asshole then you could put it to productive use. Lots of programmers have that symptom, its the reason they're good programmers. Its not about thinking in math but rather what small steps you need to follow to go through a larger, more complex, process which you can get creative with on the higher level. Programming is really just knowing a bunch of steps which can be repeated or altered to do something completely imagined by you (make that mmorpg game but with less science fiction as to the requirements to play... aside from a PC's technical specifications, lol).
I used to burn my brain power learning to program and programming stuff to make my computer use a little easier and even funny or annoying to other people (during the day time so that I'm too tired to go off on a mental tangent)... these days I use my brain power to make my life more interesting by throwing in jokes, witty yet hardly offensive remarks, pushing my life in such a way to make my resume look interesting WITHOUT having to lie. Even though its starting to look rediculous to certain people, it will be all the more interesting to these "better people" that you look for and they will not ignore you for it.

And, just to cover all my bases, don't give me the whole "you don't know shit about alcohol addiction and withdrawal" rant, I've maintained a two month alcohol intake starting with constantly being buzzed on beer to puking regularly and not even having much water to pee out. The only difference is that after I came out of such a binge I didn't go cold turkey as I felt like I was going to have a heart attack (I already had general anxiety to begin with, the alcohol just covered it up for a while and made it worse). I made sure I just had 1 single shot every time I couldn't possibly bear the current symptoms rather than freak out about the symptoms getting worse before the alcohol got absorbed until I reached a stage where I could simply deal with the symptoms (that took about a couple more weeks).

However, AMEN. Alcohol is indeed addictive.
Now, since it is the commonly accepted first step to being cured, who would like to step up and admit to their current problem?