So I'm about to meet up with a special lady friend of mine for some drinks, with no doubt the evening will quickly turn to sex. What would be the best way for me to get straight to hitting in? This girl is SO ugly in the face and loves to kiss n shit, but has an amazin body.

What should I do?

Is her face un- kissable?

maybe go for her neck as a start..?

Put a bag on her head?

This thread is full of fail.




From now on, this thread will be about...

something else.

Is her face un- kissable?

maybe go for her neck as a start..?

Put a bag on her head?

Not necessarily although there's a possibility of her big forehead/nose interfering.

Your name is like the drug, right? 2CI?

See, I can get that. ElementLady89...still don't see the play on words.

Obviously it's not that clever.

Or perhaps too clever.

I'm too lazy to care.

Your name is like the drug, right? 2CI?

I suppose.

Maybe not? Oh well.

Also - it's foreplay, not four play.

*noted*

Care to bring anything else to my attention?

If you can't spell it you shouldn't be doing it.

I don't think this will work.

That rules out copulation and fornication as well. Totally off-limits.

Offer a anal licking, is that doesnt work murder/suicide..

No just the boring stuff..

*noted*

Care to bring anything else to my attention?

Your irrefutable inadequacies. If you have to ask Totse how to fuck an otherwise okay girl, you're either a sad, lonely virgin, or too stupid to get anyone else. There's alcohol, drink until you don't care anymore. Close your eyes. Slowly push her head down after you kiss her. Tons of things any normal guy could come up with.

I wonder why there has been a wave of retarded threads made by new arrivals.

Coincidence? I think not.

Your irrefutable inadequacies. If you have to ask Totse how to fuck an otherwise okay girl, you're either a sad, lonely virgin, or too stupid to get anyone else. There's alcohol, drink until you don't care anymore. Close your eyes. Slowly push her head down after you kiss her. Tons of things any normal guy could come up with.

I wonder why there has been a wave of retarded threads made by new arrivals.

Coincidence? I think not.

You're being badly trolled, d00d.

i dunno man im having the same problem with your mom

You're being badly trolled, d00d.

Ah.

Haha. Sorry, it's late.

You're being badly trolled, d00d.

Sadly no. It's really more of predicament...You see if I hit it then all my friends who have strictly advised me not to will harass me til the end of time about. But if I don't then I missed out on some great poon. So if i do something cool ya know like put a bag on her head, then everyone will be jealous cause they aren't as awesome.

Grab her right (HAS to be right, or you'll fuck it up) boob. If she doesn't say anything, grab the other (Left. Not your left, but her left. So it would be the right one. Right?) boob.

Then proceed to fondle her however you want/stick penis in vagoo.

murder/suicide

Not to mention fellatio, cunnilingus, and "parking the pink plymouth in the garage of love"

Whenever it comes time to kiss her, close your eyes and think of Pimp C rapping this like "I got money, I got clothes, i got whips, I got hoes." and picture all sorts of cadillacs and shit swangin across a major street.

next think ya know your eyes are open and you're smiling like you enjoyed it.

i said this not as a joke but because it fucking works.

If you are sinking to this girl that you can't even bring yourself to look at is it maybe that your looks arn't all that great?

If your friends are telling you not to does this mean she has approached them and they knocked her back? Labelling you her last ditch effort?

If this is the case then a paper bag over your head would do fine. That way she doesn't have to look at the face of the guy she picked last and you don't have to look at the face of the only girl with a good body you can get your grubby little hands to.

Now Enjoy.

See, I can get that. ElementLady89...still don't see the play on words.

Obviously it's not that clever.

Or perhaps too clever.

I'm too lazy to care.

I think it's all about the extra 'l' right? Makes it Elle-mentLady89. Her name's probably elle. That's the best I can fucking do anyway.

OP have you considered not having sex with a girl you don't find attractive facially? Or maybe just avert your eyes.

This thread is useless without pics.

I'm sorry, but I draw the line at three baggers.

booze and kissing her neck will do wonders

How about you just save what little dignity you have left and try to get a better looking girl to take home?

http://i547.photobucket.com/albums/hh445/tooseei/buttlicker.jpg

http://i547.photobucket.com/albums/hh445/tooseei/buttlicker.jpg

Her face just look toooo bad. Maybe it's just the picture, or I haven't been laid in too long.

BLINDFOLD HER!!!

Girls do tend to like it. Just get a blind fold that will cover from eyebrow to mouth (silk scarf etc) and tie it on her. All you'll be looking at is her lips and she'll never realise why.

butter face nigga

and you misspelled foreplay

I must say kind sir I would absolutely love some delicious crack!

haha good advice RIP PIMP C

http://i547.photobucket.com/albums/hh445/tooseei/buttlicker.jpg

O shit O shit, that's hideous. The body seems good enough for the pushin', but that face would throw me off course as well. Have the face concealed at all costs, or else your find your erection flopping in no time by the looks of it...

Don't steal my thing, you pink motherfucker

sorry..what was the play on words for elementlady89....i found this ``actinium is dangerously radioactive. The chemical behaviour of actinium is similar to that of the rare earths, particularly lanthanum. It is found naturally in uranium ores and actinium is 150 times more radioactive than radium``....

beg to differ

a lot of people can`t spell ménage à trois

http://i547.photobucket.com/albums/hh445/tooseei/buttlicker.jpg

uhm

that girl is supposed to be ugly or what

you guys have got to be kidding me

if shes ugly then i havent got any hope

i havent got any hope

I thought you would've worked that out by now.

uhm

that girl is supposed to be ugly or what

you guys have got to be kidding me

if shes ugly then i havent got any hope

No hope? don't mind us, we're just shallow

I thought you would've worked that out by now.

it usually takes a few tries for it to sink in

No hope? don't mind us, we're just shallow

naw, not shallow. just the way guys are; i mean you ARE wired to be visual

That being said, you seem to have missed my point, which was that that girl really wasn`t that bad to look at...am i right

buther face nigga

and you misspelled foreplay

fixed

here here

please stop cluttering the world with idiots and simply kill yourself.

tell her you have bad breathe or a cancor sore, something to do with the mouth works all the time

My heart bleeds for you WAN; you can't be serious when you say you're worst than that creature, am I right?

You could mix it up a little and shove a highlighter up her ass. Then after that you can go kill yourself

Have fun

That being said, you seem to have missed my point, which was that that girl really wasn`t that bad to look at...am i right

Oo shes much more hideous in person please believe.

Oo shes much more hideous in person please believe.

Its hard to tell with her face all contorted like that.

it usually takes a few tries for it to sink in



naw, not shallow. just the way guys are; i mean you ARE wired to be visual

That being said, you seem to have missed my point, which was that that girl really wasn`t that bad to look at...am i right

it's ironic, there's so many guys out there that won't even get with a girl if she's not looking like some fucking supermodel, even though they can be far from attractive themselves...

it's ironic, there's so many guys out there that won't even get with a girl if she's not looking like some fucking supermodel, even though they can be far from attractive themselves...

OK lets not get it twisted now, I'm damn fine. If I was ugly I would of fucked this bitch already.

it's ironic, there's so many guys out there that won't even get with a girl if she's not looking like some fucking supermodel, even though they can be far from attractive themselves...

And then, when they can't get a girl who meets their 'standards,' they get bitter and angry and decide that all women are sluts and shallow bitches.

And then, when they can't get a girl who meets their 'standards,' they get bitter and angry and decide that all women are sluts and shallow bitches.

That and their mental inferiority to men of course.

Don't steal my thing, you pink motherfucker

I apologize.


I failed.

Not necessarily although there's a possibility of her big forehead/nose interfering.


i know this chick where do you live?

i know this chick where do you live?

Stfu you don't know shit.

No matter how many people try and justify it this way: Having a good body is no excuse for fucking some one with an ugly face.

You are, in effect, just fucking an ugly chick. Well done, you fucking loser. How does the rest of society's scraps taste? God damn bottom feeders.

OK lets not get it twisted now, I'm damn fine. If I was ugly I would of fucked this bitch already.

You seem pretty full of yourself. Post pics and we'll be the judges of your attractiveness to the opposite sex.

fucking a chick with a hot body and bad face is way better than fapping. Just turn the lights off/ get too drunk to care.

While this may be true.
No matter how many people try and justify it this way: Having a good body is no excuse for fucking some one with an ugly face.

You are, in effect, just fucking an ugly chick. Well done, you fucking loser. How does the rest of society's scraps taste? God damn bottom feeders.
This still applies