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... and Rock and Roll All things music and music related. Listening, Buying, Selling, Making, or Breaking. Recording, mixing, sequencing, and amplifying. What tech to use and how to use it to make music.

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 #1 
Old 2008-12-03, 02:49
Regular
 
Canada
Default Rap I Just Made

I made it in like 15 minutes, and I'm not sure if it is rhyming or rapping. Criticism appreciated.


And old rich white man will give the orders,
Some small peasant's daughter gets caught up in a war over borders,
Is this really worth it to cheapen gas for just a quarter?
Her skin is torn apart by the mortar,
Blood for gas, you're a supporter,
Get told that they are terrorists, by another lying T.V. reporter.

**CHORUS** Monster, Monster, you're a theif!
Monster, Monster, hiding behind your white teeth!
Monster, you're a theif!
Monster, hide behind your white teeth! **CHORUS**

A fake smile and candy coated news, the truth you can not find
This world will make you slow and blind
If you follow the pack you will get left behind
I've got another idea in mind.
I'm a man made of a different kind,
I won't do the day-to-day grind
in a row they stand, confined
Can't you see all our fates are entwined?

**CHORUS** Monster, Monster, you're a theif!
Monster, Monster, hiding behind your white teeth!
Monster, you're a theif!
Monster, hide behind your white teeth! **CHORUS**

This is a war you helped create,
Voted upon by a delegate,
As if your ego needs to inflate,
Give them an even higher infant mortality rate.
Monster, you're a goddamn theif!
Does this bring you relief?!
Built on a psychotic belief!
I hope you feel some sort of grief!

**CHORUS** Monster, Monster, you're a theif!
Monster, Monster, hiding behind your white teeth!
Monster, you're a theif!
Monster, hide behind your white teeth! **CHORUS**

Confusion, bigotry, and hate,
Life isn't going to wait,
This isn't a just fate,
They don't deserve to be remembered on a slate,
She falls lifeless, she was your soul mate.

**CHORUS** Monster, Monster, you're a theif!
Monster, Monster, hiding behind your white teeth!
Monster, you're a theif!
Monster, hide behind your white teeth!
Monster, Monster, Monster, Monster! **CHORUS**
 #2 
Old 2008-12-03, 20:27
Regular
 
USSR
Default Re: Rap I Just Made

Not bad with the rhyming. Not good for a song though cause it would have bad flow, if you havent noticed yet, modern rap rhymes like every other line, not everysingle one.
 
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