Originally Posted by delerium tremens

I'm signing up on this site, but I'm having a little trouble writing a profile. Help me.

1What do your exes say about you?
I have no exes, I used to have a rule of never doing anything with the same girl twice, then I started doing codeine which kept my libido in check. Fuck theres maybe 3-4 girls who would consider me a friend, but I only use them as an excuse to talk shit, I couldn't care less if I saw them drop dead.

2A little bit of background about you
My home life was fucked up, I moved out of my mum's house and in with dad when I was 14, I was drunk/high through most of highschool. I roll with creeps and weirdos, and I nearly got sectioned 6 months ago.

3What are you looking for in the opposite sex?
I want a milf so I can call her mummy while we fuck, and with luck she'll splash out on a gift every now and then (I'm like one of those sluts except with a cock). Must be wealthy.

4What are your dealbreakers [or romancebusters]?
Scat, blackmail, I dunno man I aint exactly rainbows and unicorns.

Dear santa please could you make me look good?