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| Sex and Affection Anything and everything about sex and relations. Please try to keep this forum on-topic, since things tend to wander a bit. Search through old topics before posting a new one, as questions get repeated a lot here. |
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# 1
2008-12-01, 03:43
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worst pickup line
ladies, write the worst pick up line thats been used on you and men write the worst pickup line theyve used.
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# 2
2008-12-01, 03:44
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Regular
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The Mean Streets of... TOWN!
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Re: worst pickup line
hey baby, this smell like chloroform to you?
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# 3
2008-12-01, 04:08
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Regular
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Liverpool, UK
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Re: worst pickup line
dude... there are no ladiez on teh totse
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# 4
2008-12-01, 04:10
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Regular
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The Mean Streets of... TOWN!
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Re: worst pickup line
Quote:
Originally Posted by xxdeetsxx
dude... there are no ladiez on teh internet
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fixed.
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# 5
2008-12-01, 04:38
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Regular
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East Bay, CA (Bay Area)
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Re: worst pickup line
How much does a polar bear weigh?
Enough to break the ice; Hi, I'm -----
Do you have a mirror in those pants?
No why?
Because I can certainly see myself in them.
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# 6
2008-12-01, 04:56
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Regular
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Bumblefuck, Egypt
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Re: worst pickup line
I'm going to stare at your boobs now. Here I go.
My magic watch says you have genital herpes. You don't? Oh, then I guess it must be an hour fast.
Would you mind not telling anyone that I asked you out? You kind of look like a dude.
They call me Snowstorm, cause I give you 3-4 inches and make your life a bit more annoying for a week or so.
Sorry but it looks like someone removed the battery from your car. I'm no mechanic but I'm pretty sure we could solve this by fucking.
Freud was right, mom. Dad won't be bothering us anymore. Now, what do you say we validate the second part of the theory?
Would you like to go out for some coffee? Some sex coffee?
Of all the women in the bar, you looked to me like the most likely to fuck a stranger.
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# 7
2008-12-01, 05:00
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Re: worst pickup line
excuse me miss would you like to sample my meat?
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# 8
2008-12-01, 05:04
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Re: worst pickup line
Hey babe lets leave this family reunion.
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# 9
2008-12-01, 05:21
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Re: worst pickup line
What's your favorite non laugh-track sitcom?
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# 10
2008-12-01, 05:23
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Re: worst pickup line
One used on my best friend:
So, do you ever miss being single?
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#11
2008-12-01, 05:29 |
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Re: worst pickup line
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Giggles_The_Panda
I'm going to stare at your boobs now. Here I go.
My magic watch says you have genital herpes. You don't? Oh, then I guess it must be an hour fast.
Would you mind not telling anyone that I asked you out? You kind of look like a dude.
They call me Snowstorm, cause I give you 3-4 inches and make your life a bit more annoying for a week or so.
Sorry but it looks like someone removed the battery from your car. I'm no mechanic but I'm pretty sure we could solve this by fucking.
Freud was right, mom. Dad won't be bothering us anymore. Now, what do you say we validate the second part of the theory?
Would you like to go out for some coffee? Some sex coffee?
Of all the women in the bar, you looked to me like the most likely to fuck a stranger.
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I laughed at 80% of your pick up lines....... |
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#12
2008-12-01, 05:42 |
thatsMYdog 
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
Do I know you from somewhere?
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#13
2008-12-01, 05:57 |
Minority Deport
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Re: worst pickup line
I use, "I like your shoes" a lot. girls seem to like it although it sounds stupid.
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#14
2008-12-01, 07:39 |
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Re: worst pickup line
Would you mind not telling anyone that I asked you out? You kind of look like a dude.
if someone used this line on me i would laugh so hard as to be unable to resist his penile advances.
They call me Snowstorm, cause I give you 3-4 inches and make your life a bit more annoying for a week or so.
This one's very nice too
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#15
2008-12-01, 09:00 |
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Re: worst pickup line
Quote:
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Originally Posted by thatsMYdog
Do I know you from somewhere?
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Awwww....I was going to say that one!
I hate it. |
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#16
2008-12-01, 09:51 |
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Re: worst pickup line
Quote:
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Originally Posted by thatsMYdog
Do I know you from somewhere?
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Lol, this one actually works. I got two numbers from the same party using this one.
But the funny thing was, I actually thought I knew the first one from somewhere, then upon deployment, I realised it could just be a lolpickupline. |
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#17
2008-12-01, 10:15 |
Temko
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Re: worst pickup line
"your hot - want to have a thee-some?"
...works more often then i care to count.
the one i use when i'm with friends out (just to piss them off)
"hey, i got a bet with my friends that even though i'm gay i can still kiss a girl better then most strait guys"
....even though i'm not gay it works TO often.. do girls like gays that much?!
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#18
2008-12-01, 10:19 |
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Re: worst pickup line
^^^ I think the point was to post worst pick-up lines.
But since we're on the best pick up lines now, nothing has ever worked better than saying "If you had to fuck two people with a combined age of 20, how old would the be?"
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#19
2008-12-01, 10:43 |
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Re: worst pickup line
Did you fall from heaven? Because that would explain what happened to your face.
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#20
2008-12-01, 11:11 |
MRman
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
"I have an erection. Lets use it."
"Don't make this rape murder."
those would be my two favourites. I've never actually used either, however, they are quite humerous.
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#21
2008-12-01, 14:11 |
Naffy
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Re: worst pickup line
I'm going to stare at your boobs now. Here I go.
Using this to get in a girls pants on New Years, thank you my good friend.
Whenever I want to just feel up a girl, this ALWAYS works.
"Can i hug you?"
Girl: No.
No, well.. Im gay.. So i'll do it anyway.
(hugs girl and spins here around)
Works, I got 7 numbers out of 14 girls my best chick friend knew.
:D I asked NO GIRL, for numbers, and one girl said this to me
So, if your not busy next weekend, my parents arent around.. want to come over? and she winked at me, then gave me her number..
and I found out later she is a virgin, and doesnt date..
Score?!
I dont remember one name from the whole night, and got $80 dollars worth of free pastries that i later resold. :)
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#22
2008-12-01, 14:40 |
Exothermia
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
I dont remember one name from the whole night, and got $80 dollars worth of free pastries that i later resold. :)
Two questions.
1. Who just gives away pastries?
2. There's a black market for secondhand pastries?
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#23
2008-12-01, 14:43 |
pleasure_to_burnv2
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Re: worst pickup line
and got $80 dollars worth of free pastries that i later resold. :)
Who the hell buys pastries underground?
Yo man 20 a roll for the cookies homie.
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#24
2008-12-01, 14:45 |
Naffy
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
I resold them to people I know, it works.
at any large public function wait till the guys selling hotfoods for outragous prices are about to close, ask for phr33 food.
It always works for my chick friends (there hot) and occasionally works for me.
I also kept 8 of them.. I am eating one with a KFC chicken wing as I type this.
But in all seriousness, yes you can resell pastries (good mates who like to eat cheap)
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#25
2008-12-01, 15:07 |
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Re: worst pickup line
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Naffy
I resold them to people I know, it works.
at any large public function wait till the guys selling hotfoods for outragous prices are about to close, ask for phr33 food.
It always works for my chick friends (there hot) and occasionally works for me.
I also kept 8 of them.. I am eating one with a KFC chicken wing as I type this.
But in all seriousness, yes you can resell pastries (good mates who like to eat cheap)
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How old are you? |
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#26
2008-12-01, 17:27 |
delerium tremens
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
"kiss kiss pussy cat"
"nice eyes.....I want them" *reaches for eyes*
"nice mouth"
I've used all of these at varying stages of intoxication.
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#27
2008-12-01, 17:43 |
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Re: worst pickup line
excuse me miss.....do you work at subway?
why
because you gave me a footlong
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#28
2008-12-01, 17:45 |
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Re: worst pickup line
Quote:
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Originally Posted by hollywood undead 420
excuse me miss.....do you work at subway?
why
because you gave me a footlong
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thats mine, i used it in one of some other thread around here. |
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#29
2008-12-01, 17:48 |
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Re: worst pickup line
This thread is full of ha ha.
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#30
2008-12-01, 19:32 |
Naffy
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Re: worst pickup line
How old are you?
I am 13, and look atleast 15-16..
All my chick friends are 15, and are what most of Totse dream about. :P
Ontopic: If I said you had a nice body, would you hold it agianst me?
When a chick who is already dating you says that, it is extremely hot+corny.
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#31
2008-12-01, 19:47 |
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Re: worst pickup line
The word of the day is legs, let's go back to my place and spread the word.
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#32
2008-12-01, 20:08 |
Overcast
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
Are those space pants? Cuz yo ass is outta this WORLD!!
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#33
2008-12-01, 20:54 |
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Re: worst pickup line
"Don't make this rape murder."
LAWL LAWL LAWL
god that was awesome
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#34
2008-12-01, 21:03 |
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Re: worst pickup line
"Hey! There is this calendar I'm making..."
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#35
2008-12-01, 21:05 |
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Re: worst pickup line
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Agent 008
"Hey! There is this calendar I'm making..."
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lol! that was actually pretty funny too
love a man who can poke fun at himself |
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#36
2008-12-01, 21:20 |
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Re: worst pickup line
Ontopic: If I said you had a nice body, would you hold it agianst me?
Offtopic: Works better the other way round because they don't know what you are saying until the last few words - "Would you hold it against me if I say you have a nice body?"
The word of the day is legs, let's go back to my place and spread the word.
Win!
I'm going to use this one :D
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#37
2008-12-01, 21:55 |
hooloovoo
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
A guy on the street once asked me for change so he could buy me a drink.
The best I've heard was when the s.o. and I were walking down the street, and we heard a homeless man call out to some chick: "Hey, you should stop by my place some time! I sleep in front of Pete's coffee!"
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#38
2008-12-01, 21:57 |
killface
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
Quote:
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Originally Posted by hooloovoo
A guy on the street once asked me for change so he could buy me a drink.
The best I've heard was when the s.o. and I were walking down the street, and we heard a homeless man call out to some chick: "Hey, you should stop by my place some time! I sleep in front of Pete's coffee!"
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those homeless mother fuckers got it goin' onnn. |
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#39
2008-12-01, 22:02 |
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Re: worst pickup line
A guy on the street once asked me for change so he could buy me a drink.
hey its the thought that counts!
The best I've heard was when the s.o. and I were walking down the street, and we heard a homeless man call out to some chick: "Hey, you should stop by my place some time! I sleep in front of Pete's coffee!"
fuck if someone ever said that to me he'd be raped by now
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#40
2008-12-01, 23:12 |
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Re: worst pickup line
fuck if someone ever said that to me he'd be raped by now
Hey, you should stop by my place some time! I sleep in front of Pete's coffee!
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#41
2008-12-01, 23:15 |
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Re: worst pickup line
Hey, you should stop by my place some time! I sleep in front of Pete's coffee!
lol! not very original but you make up for it with cuteness!
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#42
2008-12-02, 00:37 |
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Re: worst pickup line
lol! not very original but you make up for it with cuteness!
This.
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#43
2008-12-02, 02:53 |
The Happiest Little Nug
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Re: worst pickup line
I lost my Teddy Bear, will you sleep with me?
and
Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
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#44
2008-12-02, 03:14 |
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Regular
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Down Under (u no wat i mean:P)
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Re: worst pickup line
Apparently "Nice shoes... wanna fuck?" works better than any other pickup line, go figure.
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#45
2008-12-02, 06:51 |
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Re: worst pickup line
look for an obviously ethnic girl in the usa
"I couldn't help but notice your foreign. Do you have any American in you?"
she says "No."
You say "Would you like some?" then unzip your pants and dangle your junk
if she's asian she'll go for it for sure cuz asians have small ones
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#46
2008-12-02, 06:55 |
GnosisX
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
Well one time...
Points to right leg and says "this is Christmas"
Points to left leg and says "this is New Years"
Suggestive look "lets meet between the holidays!!.
I thought it was funny at the time.
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#47
2008-12-02, 07:14 |
Some Choad
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn't have your number in it.
Let's get drunk and take advantage of each other. Or, I could get drunk and you could just take advantage of me. OR, you can stay here and get drunk and I can go home and take advantage of myself. Either way, it's up to you.
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#48
2008-12-02, 18:26 |
Psionicist
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Eden's Garden
One used on my best friend:
So, do you ever miss being single?
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When was this? |
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#49
2008-12-02, 18:42 |
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Re: worst pickup line
"Nice dress .. it'd look better on my floor"
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#50
2008-12-02, 23:29 |
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Re: worst pickup line
thats mine, i used it in one of some other thread around here.
nope i got that one from my dad:D
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#51
2008-12-03, 00:30 |
killface
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
"If i pay your tab, it isn't technically prostitution."
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#52
2008-12-03, 00:43 |
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Re: worst pickup line
Quote:
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Originally Posted by dirty1thong1puller1am1i
look for an obviously ethnic girl in the usa
"I couldn't help but notice your foreign. Do you have any American in you?"
she says "No."
You say "Would you like some?" then unzip your pants and dangle your junk
if she's asian she'll go for it for sure cuz asians have small ones
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or she might say, "I wish" then it will be real awkward then i will be like, lol |
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#53
2008-12-03, 00:48 |
killface
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
or she might say, "I wish" then it will be real awkward then i will be like, lol
why would she say "I wish"? wouldnt it be "you wish"?
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#54
2008-12-03, 00:50 |
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Re: worst pickup line
why would she say "I wish"? wouldnt it be "you wish"?
well because some non-white girls secretely wish they were white..I thought this was pretty well-known but i guess not. nevermind then, my shit sucked
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#55
2008-12-03, 00:55 |
biscuits and poop
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
well because some non-white girls secretely wish they were white..I thought this was pretty well-known but i guess not. nevermind then, my shit sucked
I'm pretty sure that's just you wan.
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#56
2008-12-03, 01:07 |
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Re: worst pickup line
I'm pretty sure that's just you wan.
it's more common than you think
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#57
2008-12-03, 01:27 |
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Re: worst pickup line
I'm pretty sure that's just you wan.
*shrugs*
maybe
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#58
2008-12-03, 01:37 |
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Re: worst pickup line
Then you just reply "I can make your wish come true". EASY.
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#59
2008-12-03, 05:22 |
vanillanova
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
I am 13, and look atleast 15-16..
All my chick friends are 15, and are what most of Totse dream about. :P
Ontopic: If I said you had a nice body, would you hold it agianst me?
When a chick who is already dating you says that, it is extremely hot+corny.
i'm sorry but their should be an age requirement for this site,
i do not dream about 15 year old girls, i haven't since i was 15.
i dream about legal 18+ girls
that line is one of the most said pick up lines i've ever heard...
it's not bad, it's just overplayed
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#60
2008-12-03, 05:28 |
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Re: worst pickup line
i'm sorry but their should be an age requirement for this site,
i do not dream about 15 year old girls, i haven't since i was 15.
i dream about legal 18+ girls
Uh, most of Totse are basically paedophiles. I don't dream about 15 year-olds either, I dream about 16 year-olds.
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#61
2008-12-03, 05:46 |
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Re: worst pickup line
Fuck you just spilled your drink on me.
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#62
2008-12-03, 05:55 |
killface
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
Quote:
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Originally Posted by TCStyle
Fuck you just spilled your drink on me.
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that's actually one of the best. stick your elbow out to a girl walking past who's not paying any attention to you, when she bumps into your outstuck elbow, there! you've got your opener. |
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#63
2008-12-03, 06:10 |
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Re: worst pickup line
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Johnathon_Doerty
Then you just reply "I can make your wish come true". EASY.
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negative
u can make her kids white(r) but u cant make her white |
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#64
2008-12-03, 06:57 |
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Regular
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South Jersey Shore
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Re: worst pickup line
Knock knock
whos there?
Sherwood
Sherwood who?
Sherwould like you to come over here and suck my dick
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#65
2008-12-03, 07:07 |
pleasure_to_burnv2
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Aces High
Knock knock
whos there?
Sherwood
Sherwood who?
Sherwould like you to come over here and suck my dick
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you win this thread sir |
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#66
2008-12-03, 07:14 |
mastergamerx
Regular
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Re: worst pickup line
say this
him: excuse me miss did you know there's 365 bones in the body?
her: wow i never knew there was so many!
him: want one more?
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worst pickup line
