alright come December I am probably gonna have to drop for court. Then after that i will be put on probation and i dont think ill even try getting around a drug test.

anyway i wanna live the high life until that date comes to pass.

now is drinking bleach a fool proof way to pass a drug test?
(other than the act of actually drinking bleach)

also I've always relied on niacin to pass when I've smoked mj.
but when i was rehab this one dude told me about some type of jelly that was found at the grocery store in the cooking supplies.
anyone heard of it?
im sure if someone mentions the name i will instantly recognize it.

Bleach is okay. I mean it works, you just have to drink enough - and you may get an upset stomach - nothing major mind you, just a bit of indigestion but yeah. Go the bleach.
The jelly your friend speaks of is Petroleum Jelly. You buy it in smallish tubs. A popular brand is Vaseline. This work by forming a protective waxy barrier around your blood cells making them immune to testing. Eat about a tub of this washed down with a half litre of bleach and you can live whatever high life you want!

im not to sure if your talkin about the same kind of jelly.
i dunno i thought it was something used specifically for cooking.

Yeah just drink lots of bleach you'll be straight........lmao wtf?.........

im not to sure if your talkin about the same kind of jelly.
i dunno i thought it was something used specifically for cooking.

You can use it for cooking but it is mainly for moisturising and that sort of thing. You'll find it in the same aisle as toothpaste and shit.

If I ever came to the point where I would drink bleach in order to continue my drug habit I'm pretty sure I would kill myself.

How paradoxical of you.

How paradoxical of you.

How so?

Touché.

Touché.

Fuck you.

You're not pretty enough.

And I'm nearly out of whiskey.

im not to sure if your talkin about the same kind of jelly.
i dunno i thought it was something used specifically for cooking.

hmm what about strawberry

that made me laugh.
anyway i heard bleach really isnt that horrible.
like not as deadly as its made out to be and that you just have to not puke.
because if you puke the bleach goes into your blood stream faster or sum shit.

Ok ok, its NOT petroleum jelly. don't fucking eat vasline.

Ive heard the bleach thing works, a capful in a gallon of water. Thats what i was told from a man who went to prison for like 100 pounds of weed. And thats what he uses when hes on probation, apparently. I cant say its 100% true, cause ive never had to try it.

As for the jelly. The jelly hes talking about is simple flavorless gelitan, like jello without the color, sugar, flavor, ect,ect...its used for cooking. And i personally know a way to make a KILLER stink bomb from the stuff, but thats a different thread story.

GELITAN INSTRUCTIONS.
ok, you know how to make jello from the little 50cent boxes right??? Its the same shit.
You gotta put it in a pot with however much water, heat and then you let it sit in the fridge for a few hours and you have jello, right??
well, start making your clear flavorless jello and when its done being heated...drink it while its still liquid. This coats all of your organs n shit with jello...making your piss clean, apparently. Ur supposed to do it about 4 hours prior to your piss test.

Ive never tryed it, but ive been told by a man in drug court how to do it...so im pretty sure there both good ways. i would try both. BUMP
...vote for brown

You can buy the gelitan at any local grocery store, just ask a clerk where its at.
...vote for brown

im pretty sure you are correct.
the dude in rehab said it didn't taste like anything.
fuck i wish i kept the papers that we had to fill out in rehab.
i wrote it on one of them.

anyway i heard bleach really isnt that horrible.

Then drink up-- better you than me.

get the gelatin i get the stuff called certo drink it down about 2 hours before test and it will coat your bladder not letting any drug matabolites into your piss

I would never drink bleach period..

Then drink up-- better you than me.

tru dat

rofll thats funny!:D

How paradoxical of you.
I used to work with someone who was on drug court?, and he would pop rolls like everyfucking day he worked and drank bleach in front of me plenty of times. It worked for him to pass his tests up until one time he didnt drink enough or some shit and failed.. never saw him again after that.

In short, no, drinking bleach does not kill you... so its not a paradox for him to say that :p

I remember one time me and a friend 3 way called I drug hotline, he had some questions about coke if I remember correctly. The guy said bleach water does not do shit for you, and it tears up your insides, spread the word.

This.

Yeah i drank two an half cups of bleach once for drug test and i past. So recommend that method to everyone

Fruit pectin.

Fruit pectin.

exactly, i think it had something to do with the PH of your blood and what got filtered and what didn't.

You can drink some Palo Azul tea to clean out your blood from weed, but I heard they started checking for that in modern drug tests to see if you tried to clean it.

I've tried it before for job interviews, but they never actually perform the tests so I wouldn't know firsthand if it works, but you can try googling it.

This really belongs in the drug testing thread.

The bleach thing works 100%. My friend did it the day before a drug test (for weed, coke and meth) and he passed!!one!1!

ya bleach works only if you drink 2 gallons of it.

edit but you gotta pour a little bit of it into your eyes too

bleach does nothing, niacin does nothing, and agar agar protien or any animal gelatin wont do anything at all.

its an accident that ppl associate b3/niacin with detoxing, b3 slightly stimulates your metabolism, but not noticeably, ppl od on it, get an allergic reaction, and think it is them getting clean. all the hot, red, flush feelings will happen if you take too much b12 also...

there is nothing you can do...

all drinking water does is help remove the metabolites your body puts in your bladder, it does nothing to take more from your fat and put it in your bladder.

only real answer is to exorsize like hell and stay hydrated( to help with your body's normal functions while under increased load from working out.)

only thing that helps is not catching the beginning and end stream of piss, just because of gravity and how particulate settles in the bladder.

drinks do nothing, pills do nothing.. all they do is replace the nutrients ppl loose from pointlessly flushing themselves with water. all it does is help prevent a flag for your piss being too dilute. 2 cans of monster energy will make yr piss just as yellow...

yes bleach is toxic, no it wont kill you 100% of the time, but it will fail 100% of the time. bleach is sodium hypochlorate, if there is enough acid to buffer the ph of the bleach down to something tolerable for your body, you wont get hurt too much, pop a few tums with that bleach and you end up in the er. nothing binds to bleach therefore it dosent help carry anything out, it dosent dissolve anything, it dosent get taken up by your body or do anything.

JUST BECAUSE IT CLEANS YOUR SHIRT, DOESNT MEAN IT CLEANS YOU!

that douche a few posts up is misinformed, his friend got away with it cause mdma only has a body life of 2-4days, he may have been buying bzp rolls, he may have had such a reaction to the bleach he forced water down to help and coincedentaly passed clean... it does nothing.

now maybe adding bleach directly to your piss would react with the testing reagents or the metabolites(prolly just changes the ph so much the test doesnt work right) but even if you could drip it in there, guess what, on a gas chromatograph bleach shows up and stands out... so would a piss sample with a ph of 12.


STOP FUCKING USING.

read


read


read

it is your only hope.......

i cant belive someone said this post was correct...

im not just being a dick either, i am a line cook in a kitchen, its my career and life.

YOU PUT JELLO IN THE FRIDGE!

animal(and even seaweed) gelatin combined with water is liquid at 98f....

you let your jello SIT for a while. so the protien can coil up, trap the water in it, build a semi solid structure otu of tangles protein strands, and BECOME a solid. if your shake your bowl of jello like your body shakes, it wouldnt set..

and sweet jesus holy fucking COMMON SINCE:

put jello in the front of yoru mouth, relax, and wait.

if it doesnt melt, which it will, it will break down, 20 or so percent of the water will be freed, and the congealed gelatin protein will bunch up into slippery, water secreating globuoles that are so FUCKING SLIPPERY, they will slide right down your mouth, aswell as the rest of your track.

Seriously dude that is fucked up ed lister. You should be banned.

Op dont fucking drink bleach!

Stop doing drugs and drink lots of water, that is th egurenteed way to drop clean urine.


DRUG TESTING THREAD> www.totse.com/community/showthread.php?t=2112368

Seriously dude that is fucked up ed lister. You should be banned.

Op dont fucking drink bleach!

Stop doing drugs and drink lots of water, that is th egurenteed way to drop clean urine.


DRUG TESTING THREAD>

Ha ha ha

The most fucked up thing is the amount of people in here saying they've done it?

Ha ha ha

The most fucked up thing is the amount of people in here saying they've done it?

Just saying man, that what you did was in the rules. People are stupid enough to take you serious.

Just saying man, that what you did was in the rules. People are stupid enough to take you serious.

Honestly, if someone will drink bleach - disregarding the clear warnings and label that says 'Poison', let alone the fact it is a chemical you find in your laundry - then fuck 'em.

Honestly, if someone will drink bleach - disregarding the clear warnings and label that says 'Poison', let alone the fact it is a chemical you find in your laundry - then fuck 'em.

read the forum rules.
Meh I cant even find the rule anyway. maybe it isnt a rule anymore. it was somehting along the lines of "intentionally posting things that are not real that people could take serious and cause harm to them."

I used to work with someone who was on drug court?, and he would pop rolls like everyfucking day he worked and drank bleach in front of me plenty of times. It worked for him to pass his tests up until one time he didnt drink enough or some shit and failed.. never saw him again after that.

In short, no, drinking bleach does not kill you... so its not a paradox for him to say that :p

No, but its a paradox for you to make a comment about a non-paradox in a paradoxical situation that, paradoxically, was a complete demonstration of your lack of ability to correctly understand the conversation at hand.

You are trolling or just really fcken stupid


www.snopes.com/crime/clever/bleach.asp

http://www.topix.com/forum/city/mobile-al/TGB1E6RC0N6VH6BOG

im not to sure if your talkin about the same kind of jelly.
i dunno i thought it was something used specifically for cooking.

In case this hasn't been answered, it's called Certo. You drink this liquid that is used for making jello/pudding/something like 5 hours before your test and then you drink a lot of water and piss a few times before you go. It's supposed to line your urinary system with some "jelly" which stops THC stored in fats from escaping into your piss.

Apparently it works wonders. I've had 3 friends swear by this stuff. They said it worked every time they ever had to use it, which was like every month.

don't drink bleach

take shrooms and other stuff they can't test for

it is common sense, apparently the op does not have any. You shouldnt even need a source to disprove it.

fuck court fuck probation good luck

and sweet jesus holy fucking COMMON SINCE:



Lol...