She works with my roommate. He saw her first, and started talking to me about "This girl at work who I want to be with, but she's my subordinate, so it's not cool". He offers to hook me up, I'm a formerly abused ex-husband with trust issues, so I say "Meh, not really interested, but i'll help you out."

Few days later, I call his work to find out if he can pick up flour on the way home, and a girl answers in his department, and passes him the phone. I make a reflexive "Hey, she sounds cute," and later on find out that he repeated it, and that she's the girl. Ok, fine, but I'm still not really jazzed about meeting. Fast forward a week and he pretty much sets me up, picking me up from work to go out to dinner with her and him (not changed or showered). We talk a bit and have fun, but she doesn't accept the invitation for movies at our place tomorrow, so I figure, whatever.

A few days pass and we all go see a movie. Again, hanging out, flirting, nothing to write home about, and I get her number from my roommate, and start flirting heavily via text.

Then I get told I'm in the friend zone by the roommate. Okay, I think, I wasn't really looking for anything, so the only thing that bothers me about that is that I was rejected before I could start anything. Cool.

Then we go see another movie, and she's still acting flirty towards me, and I flirt back. Meanwhile he and her had been seeing each other off and on, but hadn't heard anything official myself.

Then I come to find out via IM (after she e-mails me out of nowhere, I didn't even know she had my address) that he's in the friend zone and we continue flirting.

Basically, this is where I am. She's 20, has a 9 month old son by a real d-bag, whom she's been broken up with for a month. She "Doesn't want a relationship" but I'm almost weekly (3 times in 2 weeks now) over her house late at night watching movies in her room. There have been a few times where I thought we were going to kiss but I pussied out. I've been running something resembling cocky/funny on her, but I don't do it well because my heart isn't in it. I don't want to be that guy to get a girl. And unfortunately since she "rejected" me, I've been actually having feelings for her. I'm pretty sure she's got feelings for me too, but I can write it off as her being a flirt.

We're comfortable enough with each other that we can touch each other without freaking out, and I randomly bit her during RocknRolla this past friday, to which she was surprised, and complained on the car ride home that I shouldn't do that, because it "instantly turns her on" (incidentally, most of the reason why I did it). After she brought me back to my bike to head home, I gave her a hug goodbye, and held her around the waist for a minute. I was trying to work up the nerve to kiss her, but she asked me if I was OK, and I said yeah, don't worry about it, and left. I'm not sure what happened, everything was right where it needed to be, but I just couldn't. I saw her yesterday when I went to pick up some paperwork from the roomie at work and she was just coming in, we flirted a bit, and nothing seemed awry, and I'm not sure where to go from here.

Basically what I need is a kick in the ass one way or the other. Should I swallow my so-called morals and keep being a manipulative jerk (which despite my best efforts seemed to be working well enough), or should I be myself, be straight up with her, and see how she reacts? I kind of just want to explain to her that while I may not know what I want, I know what I like, and that we should try being together. Then again, I think honestly that just getting up the balls to kiss her one of these times at the end of the night will go much farther than anything I could say to her.

I just don't know.

Sorry about your marrage pal,
but i'm not too sure what to say. You just want to kiss this woman?
I personally wouldn't go into it if she wasn't looking for a relationship, I dislike the casual thing (At this point in my life, though.) So it's your choice, I know alcohol helped me and my girlfriend have our first kiss, but 'classy' wine isn't really viewed as a get her drunk thing.

Also, maybe you're watching the wrong film - this is a big one. Horrors/Thrillers are terrible for getting in the mood. Rom-coms are the most suitable... And some of them aren't bad.
Hope that helps.

She's only been broken up with that dude for a month. May as well kiss her though, as long as you don't value the friendship at all.

Maybe do something other than watch movies too.

I'm going to tell you something about people. What comes out of their mouths doesn't mean as much as how they act and their body language. I've had girls flirting with me big time, and say shit like," I don't think we should have sex." I could be like, OK, and just back off, or I could see it for what she was really saying. Analyzing that situation, her saying she didn't want to have sex is irrelevant. The fact that she had to be thinking about sleeping with me for her to say that, is what is important. Knowing this, the conclusion is she needs to be convinced, or she wants to feel like my pressure made her do it, so she could rationalize she's not a slut. Hence, what she was really saying is, that she wanted to fuck me, but didn't want the guilt of it being her idea. Conclusion, she slept with me.

Now in your situation, she said she only wanted to be friends. I always laugh at when women say this but have been flirting with me, cause the friends zone doesn't exist for two people who are attracted to each other. She doesn't want to feel like she's jumping into anything, and is waiting for you to take the lead, which most women do. Your problem is that you actually think she doesn't want you by saying this, but the way she has been acting towards you tells you a different story, doesn't it? Basically, if you want her, man up and take her, or quit flirting.

From my experience, any girl that has been a friend of mine, has been because she is attracted to me, or is at least comfortable with me. If a woman is comfortable with you, she'll most likely sleep with you and start a relationship with you. Every woman only needs a couple things from a guy, to feel comfortable, and to feel emotional fulfillment.

Do what you like with this info.

Simple.

Next time you hang out with her, just lean over and try to kiss her. Don't think. Stop thinking and just do it. You'll have your answer.

Also, maybe you're watching the wrong film - this is a big one. Horrors/Thrillers are terrible for getting in the mood. Rom-coms are the most suitable... And some of them aren't bad.

We've watched Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Good Luck Chuck and Hulk at her place, after 10pm. I'm not sure if I pussied out or just didn't recognize it for what it was.

She came over tonight while I was exhausted from my sleep patterns being fucked up to see me. Now I feel like a douche.

We've watched Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Good Luck Chuck and Hulk at her place, after 10pm. I'm not sure if I pussied out or just didn't recognize it for what it was.

She came over tonight while I was exhausted from my sleep patterns being fucked up to see me. Now I feel like a douche.

You couldn't wake up to get some pussy?

-N-

Sounds like you could be asexual.

You couldn't wake up to get some pussy?

-N-

Nobody woke me up.

Wow you are my idol man, i fucking knew this was true i just needed to hear it from someone else.