Okay, I'm friends with this girl. Shes a year older than me (both still in high school) and were both friendly with each other. Here's where the situation get's hairy: Shes got a boyfriend in College, who she's been with collectively for about a year, but in these last few months (hes a fresh. in college) when he's been gone its been tough on them both. She sometimes gets frustrated with him and often complains about the way he treats her. I'm more of a nice guy who jokes around with her a lot. Do I even have a chance of elevating it from a close friendship to a romantic thing? Keeping in mind that she knows the extent of my sex life [including spectacular failures] and I feel like she sees me in a less mature light.

tl;dr?

Go for older chick while in the friendzone with her?

please keep in mind that I do place some value in our friendship and it would definitely make things awkward with other friends if I failed.

If you can figure out a way to both get her to break up with him AND get out of the friendzone at the same time, then I think you have a chance but other than that no it's probably not worth ruining your friendship over.

You only live once

nope.

Stop talking to her. At least in the way you do. I'd at least hang out with a different friend group or something. Just stop acting nice and telling jokes. Become someone she'd date, not someone she'd hang with, you know?

Also. Try to be a hot piece of ass, in which case she may realize she hates her boyfriend and you'll get a chance?

You only live once

QFT innit.

I have pussied out of things like this in the past and regretted it. Carpe Diem.

No. You don't have a chance at all. The fact that she's complaining about her boyfriend to you shows that she sees you as a sweet, male friend who won't get annoyed when she vents her problems. She has a boyfriend who she still cares about enough to complain about, and you're about as deep in friend-hood as it's possible to be. If you're down with being friends and nothing more, then you're all set. But forget about any romantic intentions because it's not going to happen.

http://img134.imageshack.us/img134/900/devilandangel2zd6.jpg

Come on. Who are you gonna trust?

Take a leap of faith, little brother.

you might have a chance, but unless she likes the funny type you'll probably have little luck


Think about it. If you knew a girl, tried to be funny all the time, would you sooner see her as a friend, or someone to persue?



ohw and try to be objective instead of lovecrazyhellyes

I guess I didn't explain it well enough. I discounted the fact that she talks to me about her boyfriend because no one knows him in her circle of friends (hes from another area, we work together over the summer, thats how I know him)

And thanks for the tips on becoming less of a friend more of an objective. We've already slowed communication (not really my doing but an interesting coincidence) how would you suggest becoming more boyfriend material? I am naturally sarcastic and funny by nature (I don't really make an effort to do it.) should I just be more reserved? I'm usually pretty out going.

I really feel like I am pretty close, except for this whole boyfriend thing.

Keep doing your funny / sarcastic shit , girls love that kind of garbage. What you need to realize is you need to portray that you are completely confident in all of your actions , so she feels more secure and will maybe open up even more. Do not be afraid to fail , awkwardness is what you make of it , and if your confident enough you just won't give a fuck.

I guess I didn't explain it well enough. I discounted the fact that she talks to me about her boyfriend because no one knows him in her circle of friends (hes from another area, we work together over the summer, thats how I know him)

And thanks for the tips on becoming less of a friend more of an objective. We've already slowed communication (not really my doing but an interesting coincidence) how would you suggest becoming more boyfriend material? I am naturally sarcastic and funny by nature (I don't really make an effort to do it.) should I just be more reserved? I'm usually pretty out going.

I really feel like I am pretty close, except for this whole boyfriend thing.

I can't really speak for her, but I am in a very similar situation. I'm in my last year of high school and my boyfriend is three hours away in his freshman year of university. It's very difficult to be apart, and we have just as many little problems as regular couples, with the addition of those that come with a long distance relationship. Considering that we get to spend so little time being together/communicating, I tend to avoid fighting/discussing our problems with him so as to avoid straining our relationship over the little tiffs that happen with any couple. So when I am with friends, guy friends included, I tend to vent about relationship issues. I do it because I care about my boyfriend and don't want to be a source of stress. I don't consider any guy to be potential relationship material. I love my boyfriend, and no matter how good of a platonic relationship I may have with a guy friend, they will always be friends and nothing more, no ifs, ands, or buts. It has nothing to do with how they act ; there is nothing they can do. A friend is a friend and nothing more. I'm sorry if I'm like...telling you my life story and boring you to tears, but in my case, at least, there is nothing a guy can do to become more of a romantic interest to me as long as my boyfriend is in the picture, and it's probably the same for the girl you're talking about.

I totally see where your coming from.

Thanks for your help guys n gals.

Get her drunk.

Girls love to cheat on their boyfriends when they're drunk.

In fact, you can get away with starting a conversation on a bed in this manner:

If your boyfriend were here right now, what'd you do to him?

2 times out of 2 it will end in some dome (head).

Get her drunk.

Girls love to cheat on their boyfriends when they're drunk.

Actually lol'd.

OP, I'd say give up. But then again I was in the same situation and ended up dating the girl for over a year. Chances are you wont be able to pull it off and will just ruin a good friendship.

Actually lol'd.

OP, I'd say give up. But then again I was in the same situation and ended up dating the girl for over a year. Chances are you wont be able to pull it off and will just ruin a good friendship.

Friendships are for women and queers anyway.

Friendships are for women and queers anyway.

Friendships are also an almost endless source of many more women to tap into. Depends how you look at it.

Friendships are also an almost endless source of many more women to tap into. Depends how you look at it.

The amount of time you spend talking to a woman is inversely proportional to the amount of time you spend fucking her.

^^ bein friendly to girls is well worth the effort. You can only hit on one girl at the same time. But if your nice enough to a girl she might make dozens of girls more intrested in you if they would have been otherwise

You only live once

true that.