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Sex and Affection Anything and everything about sex and relations. Please try to keep this forum on-topic, since things tend to wander a bit. Search through old topics before posting a new one, as questions get repeated a lot here.

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  #1   Add Druidus to your ignore list  
Old 2008-10-15, 05:53
Druidus Druidus is offline
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Iqaluit Nunavut Canada
Default Sexual Eudaemonia...

I almost never post here, but I just had to express my absolute satisfaction with my sexual situation.

I don't have any problems to offer (save for asking where to buy a cheap but high quality sybian), this is more of a 'bragging' post. I'm not really trying to brag, but the awesomeness of my situation speaks for itself.

My girlfriend will do ANYTHING for me. I get blowjobs at a whim, sex everyday, multiple times if I want. She deepthroats me and loves it, loves pleasing me.
a
She actually begged me to give her anal tonight because neither of us have tried it and she knew I really wanted to (I had to decline, sadly, because e-penor jokes aside, I am big enough to cause damage without a lot of practice stretching). BEGGED! I had to argue her down.

She's told me she'd lick my ass, drink my piss, basically being my cumbucket sex slave (not really my thing, but I KNOW she would). To top it all off, she's gorgeous, and jailbait for most (I'm just young enough).

She's also bisexual, and not averse to having her friends join in.

I feel like the luckiest man in the world, I can fulfill any of my fantasies simply by asking. I love her with the totality of my mind, and she recipricates.

Trouble is, I don't want to be a selfish bastard fulfilling just my own deviant pleasures. She doesn't tell me her fantasies, and I want to give her the kind of seemingly infinite joy/pleasure she gives me.

I mean, I make her orgasm, but I want to give her a rock-the-world life-changing orgasm, the kind you can only get when you fulfill a long held fantasy. How can I draw her out without drugging her with benzos or MDMA to make her more conversationally pliable? So far, the only two fantasies I've gotten from her were rape-roleplay and being tied up completely at my mercy. She enjoys me waking her in the middle of the night with my cock in her mouth, or handcuffing her to the bed. (A real thing for surprise night 'rapes') Any ideas to try? (I'm pretty much into anything, and she's happy doing whatever makes me happy) What I do now for her is great, but it's getting a little repetitive, almost scripted, even despite the fact that I do it without warning her (spontaneity is worth so much in sex)

And can she really be happy doing this for me? Or am I some kind of ogre?

She says she loves pleasuring me anyway she can, and definately appears to. But couldn't that just be baggage from an abusive relationship? I don't want that.

Anyway, to all the lonely men out there deprived of interpersonal acts of sexual gratuity, frequency, and quality, I offer you my tale so that you know that there is hope for amazing women who get off on getting you off.

BTW, what should I do for tonights surprise (around 5:45 I'll wake her out of nowhere for this)? Something novel, not just a tied up mouthfuck, or a mock-rape. I want something memorable, something she'll masturbate to for days to come.

And no, not murder/suicide, huffing raid (or jenkem), molotoving everything or getting herpes from my uncle. Not even fucking a whale (I still think it's a failed meme, or at least a shitty and unimaginative one). Nothing in that paragraph is remotely arousing, except maybe the molotoving, it kind of sounds like some kind of sex act.

Sorry for the rambling, I'm on quite a lot of amphetamines.
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  #2   Add ObsdianZ to your ignore list  
Old 2008-10-15, 06:11
ObsdianZ ObsdianZ is offline
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<-----------insert missing 'i'
Exclamation Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Wake her up with a dick in her ass.

She already fucking told you she wants anal. Rape the bitch.

*ObZ
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  #3   Add Mitchell Y. McDeere to your ignore list  
Old 2008-10-15, 06:56
Mitchell Y. McDeere Mitchell Y. McDeere is offline
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Memphis
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Stop bragging.
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  #4   Add FragginNoobsInColumbine to your ignore list  
Old 2008-10-15, 07:00
FragginNoobsInColumbine FragginNoobsInColumbine is offline
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inside your daughter Send a message via AIM to FragginNoobsInColumbine
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Druidus View Post
I almost never post here, but I just had to express my absolute satisfaction with my sexual situation.

I don't have any problems to offer (save for asking where to buy a cheap but high quality sybian), this is more of a 'bragging' post. I'm not really trying to brag, but the awesomeness of my situation speaks for itself.

My girlfriend will do ANYTHING for me. I get blowjobs at a whim, sex everyday, multiple times if I want. She deepthroats me and loves it, loves pleasing me.
a
She actually begged me to give her anal tonight because neither of us have tried it and she knew I really wanted to (I had to decline, sadly, because e-penor jokes aside, I am big enough to cause damage without a lot of practice stretching). BEGGED! I had to argue her down.

She's told me she'd lick my ass, drink my piss, basically being my cumbucket sex slave (not really my thing, but I KNOW she would). To top it all off, she's gorgeous, and jailbait for most (I'm just young enough).

She's also bisexual, and not averse to having her friends join in.

I feel like the luckiest man in the world, I can fulfill any of my fantasies simply by asking. I love her with the totality of my mind, and she recipricates.

Trouble is, I don't want to be a selfish bastard fulfilling just my own deviant pleasures. She doesn't tell me her fantasies, and I want to give her the kind of seemingly infinite joy/pleasure she gives me.

I mean, I make her orgasm, but I want to give her a rock-the-world life-changing orgasm, the kind you can only get when you fulfill a long held fantasy. How can I draw her out without drugging her with benzos or MDMA to make her more conversationally pliable? So far, the only two fantasies I've gotten from her were rape-roleplay and being tied up completely at my mercy. She enjoys me waking her in the middle of the night with my cock in her mouth, or handcuffing her to the bed. (A real thing for surprise night 'rapes') Any ideas to try? (I'm pretty much into anything, and she's happy doing whatever makes me happy) What I do now for her is great, but it's getting a little repetitive, almost scripted, even despite the fact that I do it without warning her (spontaneity is worth so much in sex)

And can she really be happy doing this for me? Or am I some kind of ogre?

She says she loves pleasuring me anyway she can, and definately appears to. But couldn't that just be baggage from an abusive relationship? I don't want that.

Anyway, to all the lonely men out there deprived of interpersonal acts of sexual gratuity, frequency, and quality, I offer you my tale so that you know that there is hope for amazing women who get off on getting you off.

BTW, what should I do for tonights surprise (around 5:45 I'll wake her out of nowhere for this)? Something novel, not just a tied up mouthfuck, or a mock-rape. I want something memorable, something she'll masturbate to for days to come.

And no, not murder/suicide, huffing raid (or jenkem), molotoving everything or getting herpes from my uncle. Not even fucking a whale (I still think it's a failed meme, or at least a shitty and unimaginative one). Nothing in that paragraph is remotely arousing, except maybe the molotoving, it kind of sounds like some kind of sex act.

Sorry for the rambling, I'm on quite a lot of amphetamines.
whats her name?
serious
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  #5   Add Druidus to your ignore list  
Old 2008-10-15, 07:09
Druidus Druidus is offline
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Iqaluit Nunavut Canada
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

I don't want to hurt her, she can't even take our small buttplug.

Quote:
Stop bragging.
Thou shall not covet thy neighbors sexual exploits.

Somewhere in the Bible. I think.

It's not bragging to state what is. Hey, I'm happy about it, just cause I tell people doesn't mean I'm trying to belittle you or get e-props that mean nothing to me. If I were bragging, it certainly wouldn't be on totse, it'd be somewhere I'd get RL points from people who would give congrats for what I've got going on.

I don't need totse to give me an ego boost, and I don't post on totse to somehow be cool.

It's just a post, it's not like I'm going on about my top-of-the-line computer while you're working a C-64.

FTR, my comp is shit.
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  #6   Add Druidus to your ignore list  
Old 2008-10-15, 07:11
Druidus Druidus is offline
Regular
 
Iqaluit Nunavut Canada
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Quote:
whats her name?
serious
Guess it in three attempts for nude pics.

You get two hints, after your first try, I'll give you the last letter, than if you fail again, the first.

Cheers!
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  #7   Add Euda to your ignore list  
Old 2008-10-15, 07:26
Euda Euda is offline
Regular
 
Canada
Lightbulb Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Druidus View Post
Guess it in three attempts for nude pics.
Jacque Strap
Drew P. Nuts
Tess Tickle
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  #8   Add Druidus to your ignore list  
Old 2008-10-15, 08:25
Druidus Druidus is offline
Regular
 
Iqaluit Nunavut Canada
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Jacque Strap
Drew P. Nuts
Tess Tickle

While mildly amusing, all are wrong. lol

Broke the rules, too, one guess at a time, then a hint. No hint for you. Or any of the acid-spiked punch.


Alright, alright, I feel bad now. You can have some of the punch. Just quit with the puppy-dog eyes...

Last edited by Druidus; 2008-10-15 at 08:31.
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  #9   Add ~1~ to your ignore list  
Old 2008-10-15, 08:46
~1~ ~1~ is offline
New Arrival
 
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Try pleasing her outside of the bedroom, Romantic dinner, flowers or buy her something nice even tho its not a special day....girls love this type of stuff even more than rape!
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  #10   Add Druidus to your ignore list  
Old 2008-10-15, 09:15
Druidus Druidus is offline
Regular
 
Iqaluit Nunavut Canada
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Quote:
Try pleasing her outside of the bedroom, Romantic dinner, flowers or buy her something nice even tho its not a special day....girls love this type of stuff even more than rape!
I do. Except for flowers. I just don't see how killing a beautiful work of natural art and giving it to someone is a sign of affection. Same thoughts on hunting tropies.

It's not outside the bedroom (or wherever we are) that the problem is. I have free run to do whatever I want, but I seem to be craving something from her I'm not getting but can't identify. And I want to know that it really makes her happy to please me like she does, or if she only tolerates doing it and pretends. I don't want her uncomfortable with what we do, but I'm afraid that she's afraid to say she's uncomfortable with something if I suggest it.

I need to get her talking about her deepest sexual fantasies, but it's not something easy to talk about for her, I guess, because she deflects the conversation somehow.
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 #11 
Old 2008-10-15, 12:12
Malkog Malkog is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Guess it in three attempts for nude pics.

You get two hints, after your first try, I'll give you the last letter, than if you fail again, the first.

Cheers!:p

Rumplestiltskin.

Now you owe me your firstborn as well.
 #12 
Old 2008-10-15, 12:26
Druidus Druidus is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Hint is N.

And through the mysteries of time travel and branching universes, you ARE my firstborn. So you can have yourself.
 #13 
Old 2008-10-15, 12:47
callumpimp callumpimp is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

i choked out a girl i fucked yesterday.
 #14 
Old 2008-10-15, 12:58
Regular
 
Istanbul, Turkey
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Druidus
Hint is N.

And through the mysteries of time travel and branching universes, you ARE my firstborn. So you can have yourself.


Nicole.
 #15 
Old 2008-10-15, 13:14
ObsdianZ ObsdianZ is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Nicole.

You idiot, N is the last letter.

*ObZ
 #16 
Old 2008-10-15, 13:14
Regular
 
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

fuck you.
 #17 
Old 2008-10-15, 13:26
Regular
 
Groovy.
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Natalie.

Gimme a call and we could arrange an Eiffel tower / Houdini / whatever for her.
 #18 
Old 2008-10-15, 13:26
Regular
 
Ontario canada
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

op: nobody gives a damn, lol
 #19 
Old 2008-10-15, 13:27
Regular
 
Groovy.
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

You idiot, N is the last letter.

*ObZ

What?

I don't know any female names that end on N.
 #20 
Old 2008-10-15, 13:28
Regular
 
Ontario canada
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

What?

I don't know any female names that end on N.

nancy
 #21 
Old 2008-10-15, 13:31
Regular
 
Groovy.
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

nancy

Read my post again and fix yours before anyone else reads it.
 #22 
Old 2008-10-15, 13:33
Regular
 
Ontario canada
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Read my post again and fix yours before anyone else reads it.

no

i refuse
 #23 
Old 2008-10-15, 13:35
ObsdianZ ObsdianZ is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Erin is the only name I can think of.

*ObZ
 #24 
Old 2008-10-15, 13:36
Regular
 
a.K.a Dfg (PK)
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Op, either your trolling or your living some good life.

Anyway, last letter N.

Rosan <---:D

I am not good with names anyway.


I would prefer, if you role play as a doctor who does a full body check ;) and then makes her wanna cum but doesn't let her until she literally begs for it.
 #25 
Old 2008-10-15, 13:56
Regular
 
Groovy.
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

I would prefer if you post pics, personally.

And then maybe send her my way.
 #26 
Old 2008-10-15, 14:53
NoSkills NoSkills is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

lauren.

did i win?
 #27 
Old 2008-10-15, 15:15
Druidus Druidus is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

No one got it, and it's been way too many guesses, lol.



Op, either your trolling or your living some good life.

Anyway, last letter N.

Rosan <---:D

I am not good with names anyway.


You were closest. Off by two letters, it's Robin.

To anyone pissed at this thread:

I wrote it on an extreme dose of amphetamines, so I really didn't/don't care about your opinion of the thread.

Game over.
 #28 
Old 2008-10-15, 15:27
Regular
 
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

I wrote it on an extreme dose of amphetamines, so I really didn't/don't care about your opinion of the thread.

then go get gonorrhea and die.
 #29 
Old 2008-10-15, 16:22
Regular
 
Groovy.
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

No one got it, and it's been way too many guesses, lol.



You were closest. Off by two letters, it's Robin.

To anyone pissed at this thread:

I wrote it on an extreme dose of amphetamines, so I really didn't/don't care about your opinion of the thread.

Game over.

But Robin is a male name.
 #30 
Old 2008-10-15, 16:27
Regular
 
a.K.a Dfg (PK)
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

No one got it, and it's been way too many guesses, lol.



You were closest. Off by two letters, it's Robin.

To anyone pissed at this thread:

I wrote it on an extreme dose of amphetamines, so I really didn't/don't care about your opinion of the thread.

Game over.

Robin, damn awesome name reminds me of Robin from How I Met your Mother
I would bone her to death.
:D


Google for details.
 #31 
Old 2008-10-15, 16:35
Dragonflame Dragonflame is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

I think your girlfriend would find having nude pictures of her on the internet quite kinky. In the spirit of this thread, and to save your relationship, you should post them asap.
 #32 
Old 2008-10-15, 16:58
Regular
 
Groovy.
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dragonflame
I think your girlfriend would find having nude pictures of her on the internet quite kinky. In the spirit of this thread, and to save your relationship, you should post them asap.


I am normally against posting nudes on the internet, but I have to say this is solid reasoning.
 #33 
Old 2008-10-15, 17:46
Regular
 
Texas
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

she is cheating on you.


you didnt think she liked sex that much only with you, did you?!

the only ones that do like sex that much, like sex that much with multiple men/chicks.
 #34 
Old 2008-10-15, 18:04
Regular
 
Canuckistan
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

I call bullshit, Ive been to nunavut, theres no hot people there. theres a few in the yukon, maybe a straggler or two in the NWT but not nunavut, never nunavut.
 #35 
Old 2008-10-15, 18:05
Regular
 
notse.net(DECEASED):(:(
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Is it Runple Stilkskin?
 #36 
Old 2008-10-15, 20:21
Regular
 
a.K.a Dfg (PK)
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Is it Runple Stilkskin?

It's Robin Old man.
 #37 
Old 2008-10-15, 21:31
rtb91 rtb91 is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Quote:
Originally Posted by stefan
I call bullshit, Ive been to nunavut, theres no hot people there. theres a few in the yukon, maybe a straggler or two in the NWT but not nunavut, never nunavut.


this, unless you're both native.
 #38 
Old 2008-10-16, 02:00
Regular
 
Ontario canada
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

Quote:
Originally Posted by stefan
I call bullshit, Ive been to nunavut, theres no hot people there. theres a few in the yukon, maybe a straggler or two in the NWT but not nunavut, never nunavut.


i lolled at this
 #39 
Old 2008-10-16, 03:15
Druidus Druidus is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

I'm too lazy to change my location listing. I go to university in the south now.

BTW, only ignorant bigots would assume that in a population of 30,000 with 50/50 ratio of Inuit to white that there are no attractive women.

You've been there? I lived there for thirteen years. I think I know a little more about it than you.
 #40 
Old 2008-10-16, 11:21
Regular
 
Default Re: Sexual Eudaemonia...

I had an ex like this and it was very enjoyable until I found out just what it was in her past that made her get off so much on these feelings of 'helplessness' in the bedroom (ie; rape roleplays, being tied up and assfucked). Just bare that in mind in the relationship and try to get ready for it. Not that I'm suggesting that she's definitely had experiences like this in the past, just that her deflection of her fantasy's and such suggest that there's a catalyst in her past there somewhere. It's really tough shit to swallow when you hear it.
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