So auditioning is a huge, fat, and ugly bitch... too most of us, am I right? Personally, in preparation for an audition, I go over the music again and again and again until it has become its own section in my brain. That's the only way I can audition and feel good about it. Anyway, I just had one and I feel good about it and that's pretty much what I had to say. You guys probably do the same thing, but share some ideas if they differ about how to get over nerves, etc.

every once in a while i'll go audition for some local punk/hardcore/metal band and i'll blow their mind, and then refuse to join and just laugh as i walk out and call them fags.

my band is always accepting auditions, but it's only for our amusement. we listen to them, and then spend 1 minute or so honestly critiquing them, and then we get louder and louder and more and more irrelevant until we're screaming gibberish at the top of our lungs about skullfucking their mothers, and if they're still there at that point we threaten them with Mace and a baseball bat.

we frequently write letters to buckethead, james hetfield, kirk hammet, brendan young, dave mustaine, paul gilbert, and tony iommi informing them of their scheduled audition with us, and their immediate resignation from every other responsibility and band of theirs.

What is your band?

what do you mean, 'what is it'???

Pretty funny is what your band is.

I always joke that I'm going to get hellhammer to come replace my drummer

But, either way. Auditions aren't that bad. But, sometimes, a weird little occurrence happens that really seals the deal for you. Like this one band I was in, I was setting up my amp, getting ready to jam a couple songs, and I'm bullshitting with the drummer while I'm doing this. So, I plug in and turn up, and just play the first riff that pops into my head, which just so happened to be the opening to "Wild Side" by Motley Crue. Without missing a beat, the drummer does that opening snare roll and goes into it. We ended up making it through the whole song, while the rest of the band just watches these two guys who've never met play through a motley crue song.

awesome.

Yeah that's cool

i think the OP was referring to REAL auditions

i always show up ten minutes early and just pace around talking to people. I try to play as little as possible to avoid blowing my chops out. The whole time i try not to think about the actual auditions until i get into the room then i really try and stay relaxed yet focused.

well, the auditions i go to ARE real, i just refuse them after i'm offered the position...

and the auditions we perform, we WOULD take someone if we found a talented musician with the right mindset. for example, if he really blew us away, and when we started shouting gibberish, he started screaming gibberish right back and then pulled a gun on us, he'd be in for sure.

Love it when that happens...One time I was warming up a little to play with some guys (not an audition per se) and I ran through the Chameleon bassline a couple times not really thinking about it...of course the drummer just had to come in with that exact sort-of-minimalist part played on the headhunters album, and the guy on keyboard who I had never met in my life recognized what we were doing and busted out a helllllllla synthed out solo on the spot.

Those moments are the only reason I can say that I don't totally loathe auditions. I always freak myself out because I drink a lot of coffee and soda beforehand.