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Bad Ideas Fraud, vandalism, torture, theft, revenge, scams, and other bad ideas. Please do a forum search and site search before posting. Questions about explosives, drugs, weapons, and hacking do not belong in this forum. Please keep things theoretical in nature. Do not admit to crimes you have done or are planning to do.

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  #1   Add Vikeif to your ignore list  
Old 2008-09-17, 05:02
Vikeif Vikeif is offline
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Leng Send a message via AIM to Vikeif Send a message via MSN to Vikeif
Default Money laundering techniques?

Nothing big, I've looked around for various techniques but they all seem too..."big" like for extremely large amounts of cash involving multiple bank accounts, etc. I'm thinking about techniques for smaller amounts (maybe couple hundred). Not enough to attract government attention, but enough for some relatives that are paying a little too much attention to my finances.
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  #2   Add deadhero to your ignore list  
Old 2008-09-17, 07:17
deadhero deadhero is offline
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southwest USA
Default Re: Money laundering techniques?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vikeif View Post
Nothing big, I've looked around for various techniques but they all seem too..."big" like for extremely large amounts of cash involving multiple bank accounts, etc. I'm thinking about techniques for smaller amounts (maybe couple hundred). Not enough to attract government attention, but enough for some relatives that are paying a little too much attention to my finances.
Depends on how close they pay attention. Do you have to provide receipts? Do they check your bank statements or account online?

Fake travel is a good way to wash small cash, if that's something you can do. Word is that in mexican towns just across the border from here, nearly half of the hotel rooms purchased are vacant. In other words, they are shown as booked as a way to move drug trade cash into legitimate transaction.

Go "out of town" but instead buy an ounce of kind bud and kick back for a week, under the radar.

If you have good computer skills you can fake a car repair receipt, or any large, intangible expense.
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  #3   Add PlentyofTorrents.com to your ignore list  
Old 2008-09-17, 07:18
PlentyofTorrents.com PlentyofTorrents.com is offline
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Up your butt
Default Re: Money laundering techniques?

Buy diamonds or other jewelry and sell them for clean cash.
Buy money online.
Buy copper and other metals resell them.

Last edited by PlentyofTorrents.com; 2008-09-17 at 07:55.
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  #4   Add Lobo to your ignore list  
Old 2008-09-17, 13:14
Lobo Lobo is offline
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ManhattanNyUSA Send a message via AIM to Lobo
Default Re: Money laundering techniques?

What you want to do isnt money laundering , just tell your relatives to go fuck off. Your proably not old enough to that yet , though. Just cash your checks at cash cashing joints and keep a hidden stash.
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  #5   Add 5.56 SS109 to your ignore list  
Old 2008-09-17, 15:50
5.56 SS109 5.56 SS109 is offline
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The Temples of Syrinx Send a message via AIM to 5.56 SS109
Default Re: Money laundering techniques?

Laundering a "couple hundred"?

Hahahaha.
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  #6   Add SomeLowLife to your ignore list  
Old 2008-09-17, 16:41
SomeLowLife SomeLowLife is online now
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Thumbs up Re: Money laundering techniques?

Quote:
Originally Posted by 5.56 SS109 View Post
Laundering a "couple hundred"?

Hahahaha.
This. Your best bet is just to mail it all to me. I will gladly take care of it.
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  #7   Add slim-ov-derby to your ignore list  
Old 2008-09-17, 16:44
slim-ov-derby slim-ov-derby is offline
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Lagos
Default Re: Money laundering techniques?

Change.
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  #8   Add DeliciousCrack to your ignore list  
Old 2008-09-17, 21:50
DeliciousCrack DeliciousCrack is offline
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Default Re: Money laundering techniques?

Online poker
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  #9   Add carltonbcool to your ignore list  
Old 2008-09-17, 23:37
carltonbcool carltonbcool is offline
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United States
Default Re: Money laundering techniques?

start your own buisness and claim that you made it legally. say that you have your own lawn buisness and that you make about 300$ profit a day mowing yards and trimming trees and shit and that you also put up fences. another thing to do is claim you are an artist. start a bullshit site and do a couple of scribbly paintings....you know...like the ones rich people pay 1,00's of dollars for. buy a ticket to new york and fly there. get back and deposit a few grands into your bank account. Bam....you sold some paintings in new york to a rich guy. or sold a bunch of small ones

you dont even have to start a buisness. just deposit it in your bank account. if anyone asks....you made some extra money mowing yards on the side. say you have been mowing one yard a day and that on average you get paid 40$ per yard.

i mean....the government is never gonna think that you are exaggerating how much money you have. They look for people who try to say that they make less money then they do to save on taxes. I know people who own there own buisnesses and they just deposit cash. they dont have proof of ever selling any products or providing any services.

they never have any problems from the government saying..."could you prove that you really do have a legit lawn buisness? cause we need proof that you are not actually dealing drugs and using the lawn buisness as a way to deposit the money in your bank account."

you see what im saying. the government will never figure it out. they look for people cheating on taxes. the government will never know you made the money illegally and that you laundering it in through your fony buisness. so wether you are making 300$ cash a day or 1,000$ cash a day just say you have some kind of talent and that you made it in some other statte. just think of some buisnesses that work on cash exchanges. i used to mowe yards. i made about 50$ a day. i dealt in cash. so if i was to start stealing and wanted to deposit all my money in an account i would just say that i have been mowing yards and cutting down trees.

if i start making more money....say 1,000$ a day from stealing. Then i will have a nice site designed and start some art businesses. Then i will just fly to new york every now and then and claim that i went and did alot of paintings in new york for people. and i really can draw portraits. so i could claim i was drawing portraits and charging 200$ a piece. the government would never know i was lying.

whats sad is that as good as i draw i really could probably fly to new york and get paid 200$ a portrait.
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  #10   Add Lobo to your ignore list  
Old 2008-09-17, 23:40
Lobo Lobo is offline
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ManhattanNyUSA Send a message via AIM to Lobo
Default Re: Money laundering techniques?

Quote:
Originally Posted by carltonbcool View Post
start your own buisness and claim that you made it legally. say that you have your own lawn buisness and that you make about 300$ profit a day mowing yards and trimming trees and shit and that you also put up fences. another thing to do is claim you are an artist. start a bullshit site and do a couple of scribbly paintings....you know...like the ones rich people pay 1,00's of dollars for. buy a ticket to new york and fly there. get back and deposit a few grands into your bank account. Bam....you sold some paintings in new york to a rich guy. or sold a bunch of small ones

you dont even have to start a buisness. just deposit it in your bank account. if anyone asks....you made some extra money mowing yards on the side. say you have been mowing one yard a day and that on average you get paid 40$ per yard.

i mean....the government is never gonna think that you are exaggerating how much money you have. They look for people who try to say that they make less money then they do to save on taxes. I know people who own there own buisnesses and they just deposit cash. they dont have proof of ever selling any products or providing any services.

they never have any problems from the government saying..."could you prove that you really do have a legit lawn buisness? cause we need proof that you are not actually dealing drugs and using the lawn buisness as a way to deposit the money in your bank account."

you see what im saying. the government will never figure it out. they look for people cheating on taxes. the government will never know you made the money illegally and that you laundering it in through your fony buisness. so wether you are making 300$ cash a day or 1,000$ cash a day just say you have some kind of talent and that you made it in some other statte. just think of some buisnesses that work on cash exchanges. i used to mowe yards. i made about 50$ a day. i dealt in cash. so if i was to start stealing and wanted to deposit all my money in an account i would just say that i have been mowing yards and cutting down trees.

if i start making more money....say 1,000$ a day from stealing. Then i will have a nice site designed and start some art businesses. Then i will just fly to new york every now and then and claim that i went and did alot of paintings in new york for people. and i really can draw portraits. so i could claim i was drawing portraits and charging 200$ a piece. the government would never know i was lying.

whats sad is that as good as i draw i really could probably fly to new york and get paid 200$ a portrait.
I cant believe you wrote all that for this retard.
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