Before I say anything else, I need to state that I have perfectly good hygiene.

So, I've noticed through the course of my 19 years of life that people only get so close to me. I can make friends at work and school well enough, but after four years of going to high school and spending every day with the same friends, I never once heard "Dude, we're doing such-and-such after school, feel like coming along?" This same group of guys spent all sorts of time hanging out and getting into trouble after school, but never once was I invited to anything by anyone, period. Same thing with work. These guys have tons of fun shit going on, but they get all passive-agressive anytime I bring up tagging along. Seriously, what the fuck? Is there an invisible barrier around me that kicks in after work or school? What is the fucking deal with people just not wanting to be anywhere near me outside the context of work or school?

It's pretty fucking depressing.

man I get that sometimes, but my problem is that I don't socialize too much with them, so they probably don't feel too comfortable.

But this only happened with one or two.

do you know these guys to consider them real friends, or are they just...the guys you know from work?

Yes, some of them definitely qualify as real friends, especially after a good 4 years of school.

well in that case, I would straight up ask them why they don't want to hang out with me.

seriously, I really don't hesitate in asking questions when it comes to problems with friends. It's way better than speculating as to why they have a problem with me.

For example, I am having sort of the same problem you have, but with my best friend who I've known for 8 years. Well today I asked him, "so why the fuck you never want to hang out?" he goes "what?", I said "you never leave your house, or go out" he says " I don't know, I just like chilling at my house" I said " OK I'll keep that in kind next time I think about inviting you to go somewhere". I'll probably stop talking to him, 8 years down the fucking drain because that motherfucker doesn't go the fuck out.

The point is that it'd be better to just ask them and get an honest answer.

or an awkward or hostile one
but yeah, i still agree with you anyway

Do you think more that you speak when your with them?

Are you a bit controlling/bossy/like to give advice?

Do they all share one common thing that you dont?


It happens to me sometimes. I think its because im a bit awkward with people. That and i dont like "hanging around" and being unproductive.

Maybe they think you're gay?

Those guys who get into "troubles" after school aren't type of guys you wanna hang out with.

Trust me on this. They "might" bring you, but they will just fuck with you and laugh at you.

maybe you're annoying for one reason or another, and they just don't want to deal with you in their own personal world. But they like you enough to be friendly at work/school.

Why don't you try to organize an event with them, invite them to your house to hangout.

sure
everyone loves that guy who allways goes like "wutf you guys I saw on FACEBOOK that you had fun yesterday without inviting me!! THINK OF MY FEELINGS PLZ!!!"

Find your own fun and bring people along for the ride. You don't have to rely on others for a good time.