I want to get into more fights, but it's hard to find someone who wants to fight back. What the fuck should I do? How do I piss someone off enough to want to hit me?

Attempt a french kiss while grabbing for his nipples . . .

tell them how good of a president George bush is.

Make sexual advances towards them
Make vulgar comments about how fat or how easy his mother is

tell the guy you fucked his girlfriends brains out last night and she was a lousy lay

you know this type of shit will get under the skin of most retards and you'll be able to have some fun kicking their asses

Punch him in the face.

Then apologize and offer to kiss it better.

Walk around central London (or other major city) with a of T-Shirt featuring Tubgirl in all its graphic glory. For added kicks (pun intended), you could also point out that she was underage when that picture was taken.

Spit in his face; enough to make anyone boil with rage.
People flip out for that shit over here because it's the most degrading shit to ever happen to you, especially in front of other people.

Slim you've done it again.

1. Advocate pedophilia loudly in public, preferably in a far-right blue-collar neighborhood.

2. Wait for someone to take a swing at you.

3. Plant them in the ICU.

...and...

4. Goto #1.

It takes a certain art to get people to finally take a swing at you... if you try to pull something which is too obviously fake, you're fucked... but if you're too cautious or sensitive of other people's feelings, there's a risk you'll just be mistaken for an edgy intellectual type...

The way around this is usually to either...

a. Use LOTS of descriptive language. Don't blather on about "I believe sexual relations with any age is alright," try something with "the sphincter of the newborn pulsating upon the rigid shaft, quivering with glee at each slightest movement, is something our society should celebrate." You'll get lots more people taking the bait (and getting pounded) that way. Visual imagery. It's your friend.

...or...

b. Be in-your-face queer militant. Figure out a nifty little two- or four-line protest chant sometime, and just shout it into the air, rather loudly. You're looking to convey that you're on top of the world to the point where you're a little disconnected from day-to-day reality, and will probably be having the time of your life as you get beaten to the ground. Then, break them when they try...

Full-term is way too old!
We're here, we're queer, we're proud, we're bold!

...

Babyfuck! It's awwwight!
Pedo pride will show our might!

...

Diapered love is the best!
Put that toddler to the test!

...should get you started. Seriously, just put on a smile and have a one-person protest, and if you can't get even one person to take a swing at you... you're doing it wrong.

However... YOU MUST GET A FRIEND TO RECORD THIS SHIT AND POST THE VIDS!!! Srs... the internets demands this shit...

But... yeah. That should solve your problem...

I know a way to get most people to fight you. Walk up to someone and be like "yooo john (even if thats not his name) remember that party when I paid you 5$ to suck some guys cock? Man your such a faggot"

At this point the guy will either attack you (if hes insecure) or he will try to clear up the mistake by saying something like, "you got the wrong guy bud, my names mike and I never have never sucked a cock for any amount of money"

Just keep playing at him. By this point hes probably mad but trying not to show it.

"No man, it was you, I remember your face, you were really drunk maybe you don't remember but I KNOW for a fact you sucked some guys cock"

Start saying it really loud so everyone can hear and try to cause a scene. The more people that see him take these insults the more likely he is to try and smash your face in. Keep at it. Some people are really scared to fight but if you piss him off enough he will.

"Man I KNOW you sucked a cock, ok, other people saw too, you probably don't remember. Plus I can tell from just looking at you, you look like a grade A faggot. Seriously, its not an insult, if I was a faggot I would be all over your gay ass."

At this point he will purpose an ultimatum (assuming he hasn't attacked you already). He will say something like "That wasn't me and if you mention it again im gonna kick your fucking head it"

Keep at it. Hes almost at the breaking point.

"Man... just admit it, you love it when men cum all over your face and in your mouth. I bet you would let me bend you over and fuck you right here you little faggot bitch"

If he hasn't attacked you by this point then your probably dealing with a Buddhist. Even they can be tricked into fighting though. Try mentioning shit about his family.

"Dude.... so what your gay... its not like your fat ass dad raped you... or maybe he did, and thats why your such a faggot little bitch"

Continue on like this until he either throws a punch or insults you. If he insults you don't be afraid to spit in his face. Thats a sure way to get your face kicked in.

Good luck.

Ima do that next time i get blind drunk/ drink 18 beers and drink a bottle of whine.

just be yourself

Wow, how many threads do you have to kiss up to slim in? Might wanna get his dick out of your ass.

Forgive my scepticism, but I doubt this.

My guess is you are just another soft suburban kid whose sole experience with fighting is confined to video games.

__________________
Sell your cleverness, and purchase bewilderment. -- Rumi

What to do: piss off someone

How to do: piss on someone (literally)

wow be glad its hard for u to get in a fight. In my school u have to be real careful to avoid conflict.

THIS.

No lie.

lolllllll fuck that

I won't stop kissing his ass until he's ejaculated into every orifice in my body.


And I CAN fight. That's why nobody fights back. I've tried everything; taunting, girlfriend jokes, I even ripped a guys sweater open. To no avail.

How do you make someone fight you?


Make him be the first one to hit back.

Tell them their girlfriend is loose. So loose that when you got her pregnant the fetus just slipped out, and now you have it in a jar.

hahaha you sound like a fuckin faggot, I beat the shit out of people like you. People like you are such fuckin losers..

Wanna get in more fights? Go outside a half decent boxing club and try your shit.. Get knocked the fuck out like the punk bitch you are..