totse.com | ITT: Why we can't get laid

SHH · #1 2008-08-31, 10:29

I can't cause I don't know what to do. On the rare occasion I've been presented with the possibility of something happening I just start thinking "this girl is coming on to me" then I don't know what to do, so I just leave it.

ijustsmokedmylastbowl :( · #2 2008-08-31, 10:52

I do get laid.

- ijsmlb

SHH · #3 2008-08-31, 10:53

Quote:

Originally Posted by ijustsmokedmylastbowl :( View Post

I do get laid.

- ijsmlb

I just smoked my last bowl too

arquin · #4 2008-08-31, 10:55

Not sure if it will amplify the emotions I'm currently feeling (not over ex) so just politely turning people down till I know what to do.

rabbitweed · #5 2008-08-31, 11:02

I have two hurdles.

A. Finding a girl I want to sleep with

This is a monumental task, and seemingly statistically possible.

If I achieve that, I am left with the not insignificant challenge of;

B. Getting her in bed.

In the past...3 years, I have achieved A twice and B once.

Yeah

Galgamech · #6 2008-08-31, 11:04

I do.

cronic5 · #7 2008-08-31, 11:05

Because me and my girlfriend broke up and I can't get over it.

Numberjumbo · #8 2008-08-31, 11:09

I never go outside.

deus-redux · #9 2008-08-31, 11:35

Totse.

-deus-

wires · #10 2008-08-31, 11:42

Totse is not an excuse!

Danny JMC · #11 2008-08-31, 11:45

If you don't have problems getting girls to the point where they're ready to sleep with you... It's not that big of a deal. Most guys on their fast time cum too fast or can't get it up. It's normal to be nervous. At some point you've just got to say, 'Fuck it'. Literally.

Have a crack, dude.

Sniper78 · #12 2008-08-31, 12:08

Seriously you just have to fucking man up. If the chick is showing you any interest at all. Just be straight up and if it doesn't work out move on. That's it.

Misfit · #13 2008-08-31, 12:11

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sniper78 View Post

Seriously you just have to fucking man up. If the chick is showing you any interest at all. Just be straight up and if it doesn't work out move on. That's it.

What if no chicks never show you any interest which I assume is the case with most totseans?

Born To Kill · #14 2008-08-31, 12:50

I do eet often

Your problem is by using the term "getting laid"

Don't do it.

stripped · #15 2008-08-31, 14:21

Quote:

Originally Posted by ijustsmokedmylastbowl :( View Post

I do get laid.

- ijsmlb

Everything he said, just smoked my last bowl too.

HTTP · #16 2008-08-31, 15:32

Quote:

Originally Posted by ijustsmokedmylastbowl :( View Post

i do get laid.

- ijsmlb

12345

ComradeAsh · #17 2008-08-31, 15:33

Something about not bothering to 'step up to the plate' because its easier to sit on the bench drinking...gatorade.

My other friend finally got laid the other night, kinky asian with spanking and dirty talk, what the fuck is that?

Rykoshet · #18 2008-08-31, 15:34

I do get laid, but not nearly as much as I'd like. I blame:

High standards.

That and I'm going through a phase where I'll only have sex with sub-100 pound asian girls.

I'm also usually too drunk to give a shit.

Also, when I'm out at a bar or club, I prefer to hang with my boys than lose 400 IQ points listen to a girl bitch about shoes or other vapid subjects.

Rykoshet · #19 2008-08-31, 15:45

Also, I hate to admit it, but since I deleted facebook people don't take the time to just FUCKING call me and invite me to parties.

Goddamn.

Toothlessjoe · #20 2008-08-31, 15:53

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rykoshet View Post

Also, I hate to admit it, but since I deleted facebook people don't take the time to just FUCKING call me and invite me to parties.

Goddamn.

I have 'friends' like that. Unless I call them and arrange stuff, they NEVER call. It's stupid.

Sniper78 · #21 2008-08-31, 16:48

Quote:

Originally Posted by Misfit View Post

What if no chicks never show you any interest which I assume is the case with most totseans?

It's called going out like to clubs and shit. If you're under 21 go to college parties. Chicks won't show interest in you unless you're around them.

easeoflife22 · #22 2008-08-31, 16:59

I'm in the getting laid club. Women are everywhere and want cock. Just kiss the girl and let your hands start wondering. She'll tell you to stop If she doesn't want to fuck. If she doesn't, round the bases and fuck her.

asthesunsets · #23 2008-08-31, 18:01

depression neurosis

Dragonflame · #24 2008-09-01, 00:25

I dont have too much of an issue when I try, but Im usually drunk or on something else.

stab · #25 2008-09-01, 01:00

Quote:

Originally Posted by ijustsmokedmylastbowl :( View Post

i do get laid.

- ijsmlb

what. Hwhwhsyu

SomeLowLife · #26 2008-09-01, 01:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rykoshet View Post

I do get laid, but not nearly as much as I'd like

Ain't that the truth.

Lt_Flippy · #27 2008-09-01, 01:12

Quote:

Originally Posted by Numberjumbo View Post

I never go outside.

this...

evilman · #28 2008-09-01, 03:43

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lb13 View Post

man you guys glorify pussy like it was made of gold.

by the way its not.

just talk to every girl you like,

if one shows interest , maintain the convo and laughs.

eventually brake the ice of personal space.

if she is in to you she wont back away.

if you play your cards right you can even fuck the first day.

wow doesn't that just devalue the over glorified vagina?

threads like this make me laugh like guys who fall in love

with bitches that everybody has done fucked.

seriously grow up.

in a few years you'll most likely realise that the whole "fuck and forget" routine wont get you anywhere.

and if you read my post at all you would realise i dont glorify pussy my problem is that i undervalue it and therefore lack the effort to go after the afore mentioned pussy

Cozy Amnesia · #29 2008-09-01, 04:43

Quote:

Originally Posted by SHH View Post

I just smoked my last bowl too

Me three.

Name's Taken · #30 2008-09-01, 12:32

Quote:

Originally Posted by rabbitweed View Post

A. Finding a girl I want to sleep with

Quote:

Originally Posted by Numberjumbo View Post

I never go outside.

These.

cant b bothered · #31 2008-09-01, 12:53

They all know I slept with Winston and there's no other guys.

fuckinsuckit · #32 2008-09-01, 13:42

it aint that hard to get laid just pretent to be itreseted in what they are talkin about make a couple of moves and if they dont shoot you down then go for it have fun get your dick wet post pics

Lb13 · #33 2008-09-01, 17:59

Quote:

Originally Posted by evilman View Post

seriously grow up.

in a few years you'll most likely realise that the whole "fuck and forget" routine wont get you anywhere.

and if you read my post at all you would realise i dont glorify pussy my problem is that i undervalue it and therefore lack the effort to go after the afore mentioned pussy

and who the hell are you to lecture me on my lifestyle?

pussy isn't nothing but a fucking grip on your dick.

evilman · #34 2008-09-01, 19:29

Quote:

and who the hell are you to lecture me on my lifestyle?

im god

Lobo · #35 2008-09-01, 21:02

This thread makes me life so much better.

Thank you , douches.

VinMetal666 · #36 2008-09-02, 02:29

1. I'm single

2. I'd rather wait to fuck someone I love than fuck a random whore or prostitute

moonmeister · #37 2008-09-02, 02:34

Because we aren't in college?

Is Boobsy McFirehazard in the D? Throw yourself on her tender mercies & ask her to hook you up if she is. For old time totse's sake.

Transparent · #38 2008-09-02, 02:36

Quote:

Originally Posted by dark-easterbunny View Post

But, is that something to be sad about, being invited to parties by people who only know people cause of facebook? Sounds like a bunch of lame pc nerds anyways

This is a stupid thing to say. Everyone I know has Facebook. Nearly everyone in their teens or twenties has Facebook. Atleast that's what it's like around here. So, in conclusion, not everyone that has Facebook is a lame pc nerd.

Oh, and to the OP. Try clubs/school dances/parties/whatever involves getting up close and personal with chicks. You just have to have the balls to participate in one of these things and you'll eventually get something.

Lobo · #39 2008-09-02, 02:59

Quote:

Originally Posted by VinMetal666 View Post

1. I'm single

2. I'd rather wait to fuck someone I love than fuck a random whore or prostitute

Number 2 made me lol'd.

tsk tsk , that girl your going to "love" is going to be a whore to you in the long or short run.

Independence Day · #40 2008-09-02, 03:05

Quote:

Originally Posted by imabout2smokemylastbowl :( View Post

I do get laid.

- ijsmlb

This.

whitelightning · #41 2008-09-02, 04:54

I haven't gotten laid because I have not tried to for a while. I know with hard work and dedication I can go out and bag an attractive girl. I just dont feel like going out these days.

Galgamech · #42 2008-09-02, 05:09

Quote:

Originally Posted by VinMetal666 View Post

1. I'm single

2. I'd rather wait to fuck someone I love than fuck a random whore or prostitute

I foresee you getting hurt by the wimmins

I usually say something like this to girls who want to be my gf

"I don't really want a gf right now you know what I mean? Nothing to do with you its just like I don't want a commitment or something. Can we just stay kinda how we are right now? I feel like we are a bit more then friends."

Which is usually really how I feel btw.

This results in one of the following
1. fail
2. fuck buddies
3. they are subtly told no
4. they slowly become a gf over more time

If I actually want to be with someone I will usually ask them

5MOK420 · #43 2008-09-02, 08:02

Quote:

Originally Posted by SHH View Post

.

this'll be our little secret...

PoPcOrN PeOpLe · #44 2008-09-02, 11:14

Quote:

Originally Posted by wires View Post

Totse is not an excuse!

Yeah! because of totse, my sex life has increase from none to infinity women begging for it.

Lobo · #45 2008-09-02, 16:57

Quote:

Originally Posted by PoPcOrN PeOpLe View Post

Yeah! because of totse, my sex life has increase from none to infinity women begging for it.

fucking this.

I just tell em im a mod , doesnt matter which one.

Thanks for all the free pootang.

23 · #46 2008-09-02, 17:01

We? Got a mouse in your pocket?

ComradeAsh · #47 2008-09-02, 18:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by 23 View Post

We? Got a mouse in your pocket?

Or a bee in your bonnet?

evilman · #48 2008-09-02, 19:49

Quote:

Originally Posted by 23 View Post

We? Got a mouse in your pocket?

is that a mouse in your pocket or do you just have penile carcinoma that has extended into the corpora cavernosa.

lulz

Xandre · #49 2008-09-02, 23:50

Because no woman on Earth is good for us *in deep manly voice* But yeah...

I do.

Transparent · #50 2008-09-03, 02:37

^^ Ok...

Anyways. I hate how many expenses come with girlfriends. Meh, I guess I'm cheap.

i poop in your cereal · #51 2008-09-05, 21:24

Because I have issues.

Wicked issues.

Lobo · #52 2008-09-05, 22:14

Quote:

Originally Posted by Transparent View Post

^^ Ok...

Anyways. I hate how many expenses come with girlfriends. Meh, I guess I'm cheap.

*Night at the movies*

"Holy fuck , you want JuJu beans too you selfish cunt ? "

lulz.

ZeroMalarki · #53 2008-09-05, 22:15

I never have a condom at the right time, or cum too early.

I get laid once a month. If I had time and a better place, I could do it no problem.

Lobo · #54 2008-09-06, 14:48

^ Really ?

I always have a condom but ive had many occasions where I knew even if i didnt have one , I would of gotten laid.

Maybe I just fuck really slutty chicks , idk.

Discuss.

WritingANovel · #55 2008-09-14, 03:28

Quote:

Originally Posted by moonmeister View Post

Because we aren't in college?

holy shit how old are you son?