So yeah, uh, going to jackoff a couple of times before... check, condom, check (any recommendations?), i'll be drunk....etc?
Anything else a nooby should worry about?

Try slitting your throat? You'll be doing somebody a favour.

Hey man, fuck you...

Most of us didn't plan ours in such great detail. I wasn't aware ten dollar hookers did appointments.

Jokes aside, congrats man, good luck.

Don't even bother wacking it a few times before you do the deed. The alcohol and condom will fix that for you.

Na it's no hooker ha it's just this girl i know will have sex with me and a party...etc so i'm pretty sure. And alright about the alcohol and condom. I just don't want my first time to suck.

I hope your first time goes better than mine did, although I blame either the condom I was using or my gf was dry from being nervous.

Gah, well you don't want to seem like the guy who's planned obsessively. Yet if you haven't you considerably reduce the chances of getting to the stage where the girl might find out if you had.

Double edged sword

Do what feels natural. Try not to hype it up, because things get a lot better the subsequent times. Your first is unlikely to be spectacular. That said, enjoy yourself, and think about how you are going to act afterwards.

Spit on her heaps to make her wet