Well, it sure has been a long time since the second, so how about another one?

Anyway, all this time, and still no one special.

In the year or two past, I've lost my virginity, in an epic manner even, if only to the outside viewer. My first time was in a threesome, to which I was invited by my friend and his girlfriend. It was fun, but there was no kissing, and no cuddling afterward. I felt like this lame moocher, a dog you throw a bone too out of mercy, receiving but a single compliment reflecting just what I felt...

"With practice, you could be as good as Will!"

I was the understudy, the apprentice, a side kick looming in the shadow of my heavily experienced friend. It almost made me feel like I didn't have what it "took" to be in a loving relationship, and, like money, it takes it to get it, and I have none.

Never one to make a mistake twice, I went on to make other mistakes! Fat chicks, one night stands, one night stands with fat chicks, another guy, and an orgy in Florida with people I've only seen once, and probably won't see again. All leaving that same, empty feeling. I knew, even then, from life, from warnings, from this very board, what was wrong, and yet I was forced, by my own personality flaw, to try it all at least once.

I also, since last time, have only grown pickier. At first I wanted an innocent girl, then nerdy, before finally settling on a true gem. Headstrong, battle scarred, confused, and thrill seeking. I found this girl, fell in love, and did everything I could, gave her everything I could.

I got nothing... Nothing but a stab to my front. Stabs I was used to, but this was not the same. Even after all I had come to learn in previous years, all the methods, all the feelings, all the things about myself that I thought I had known... nothing. Like doing the check math on each of the multi-choice answers, only to come to that last one, just to see that it's wrong as well.

Now, I don't know what girl is for me, or how to go about finding her, or even if I should be out finding her. She could come to me, and I'd never even know it, I feel. Not a girl in my life, ever. No one to wake up next to, give gifts to, or shower my affection on without fear of just coming off creepy...

At least, I used to think I was pretty affectionate, but then again, how would I know?



Edit: How about you my friends? There were many, have you improved?

*blows the dust off the record player*

*jazz music*

http://img214.imageshack.us/img214/1382/facepalm2ly3.jpg

Did I say it sucked? I said it sucked!

But as for a serious reply...

Not everyone was cut out for this whole "love" thing. In the vast wide world there have to be anomalies that crop up at random times in certain locales. Maybe you are the kind of person incapable of having reciprocal affection with a woman. That stuff has to happen at least sometimes.

I'm sure, in a universe of infinite possibility, it has to, but to me? I feel like I have affection locked away inside! I LIKE sex, even if I'm a bit mediocre at it.

I mean, really, the down syndrome kid next door found his soul mate, am I really THAT inept?

I'm sure you've had the sneaking suspicion for a long time now that there is something different about you. Maybe this is it.

Sex and affection are different things entirely, which is why we have a forum titled sex and affection, since the admins even realized this.

This isn't about "being inept" or lacking talent or anything like that. Don't confuse an inability for affection to be indicative of anything but exactly that, an inability for affection. It doesn't mean you are "evil" or "ignorant" or anything like that. It just means maybe it wasn't meant to be.

Like those LEGO sets with the missing pieces?

Give it time man...I'm sure you'll find someone...and if not, well, you can just keep telling yourself you will!

How old are you?

You people are missing the point of lonely threads.

As a forum veteran, I would know, however.

When was the last one WAFI? I'll update you since then, though it's nothing as good as your stories.