totse.com | What can't you take with you when you travel to the States?

zuperxtreme · #1 2008-07-18, 19:37

Has anyone traveled recently into the States?

I need to know what you can't take with you. I think I've read somewhere that you can't take liquids on you?

What shouldn't be taken on board?

EDIT: I know this should be on a different forum, but she's traveling tomorrow and I need an answer ASAP...

JustAnotherAsshole · #2 2008-07-18, 19:44

You cannot take whatever the Glorious Leader says you cannot take.

You will not question the Glorious Leader.

HEIL!

___________________________________

Well, you can't bring drugs or anything like that, obviously.

No knives or weapons in your carry on.

I believe you can carry small amounts of liquid. Don't bring any important or expensive liquids (Like medicine or expensive booze) with you if it's more than the size of a soda can.

SkaterRaider · #3 2008-07-18, 19:49

Quote:

Originally Posted by JustAnotherAsshole View Post

You cannot take whatever the Glorious Leader says you cannot take.

You will not question the Glorious Leader.

HEIL!

___________________________________

Well, you can't bring drugs or anything like that, obviously.

No knives or weapons in your carry on.

I believe you can carry small amounts of liquid. Don't bring any important or expensive liquids (Like medicine or expensive booze) with you if it's more than the size of a soda can.

Yeah, my girlfriend's dad had to pour his flask of 18 year aged whiskey.

It was a sad day.

zuperxtreme · #4 2008-07-18, 19:49

Ah, so just taking perfume or some shit like that it's ok?

zuperxtreme · #5 2008-07-18, 19:50

Quote:

Originally Posted by SkaterRaider View Post

Yeah, my girlfriend's dad had to pour his flask of 18 year aged whiskey.

It was a sad day.

haha, reminded me of this:

http://www.smh.com.au/news/news/ange...135597636.html

SkaterRaider · #6 2008-07-18, 19:54

Quote:

Originally Posted by zuperxtreme View Post

haha, reminded me of this:

http://www.smh.com.au/news/news/ange...135597636.html

Haha that's hilarious, especially since my girlfriend's dad attempted to down his whiskey too, but he couldn't handle it.

I think perfume might be ok, as long as it's in a container that's less than 3 ounces. Also, I think all your liquid containers have to be held in a plastic bag, so they can check them.

EDIT: Source: http://www.tsa.gov/travelers/airtrav...ted-items.shtm
http://www.usairways.com/awa/content...y/default.aspx

insoundfromwayout · #7 2008-07-18, 20:03

Also, remember certain books are banned. Don't try to bring in On Liberty, On the Origin of Species, anything from the Enlightenment period, or books on fitness or cuisine.

ShoeBong · #8 2008-07-18, 20:06

WTF are you trying to sneak into my country? You can't bring the normal type of things... drugs, weapons, children who aren't actually yours.

JustAnotherAsshole · #9 2008-07-18, 20:17

Quote:

Originally Posted by insoundfromwayout View Post

Also, remember certain books are banned. Don't try to bring in On Liberty, On the Origin of Species, anything from the Enlightenment period, or books on fitness or cuisine.

I lol'd ^^

It's astounding how many people here really don't believe in evolution...

zuperxtreme · #10 2008-07-18, 20:33

Quote:

Originally Posted by SkaterRaider View Post

Haha that's hilarious, especially since my girlfriend's dad attempted to down his whiskey too, but he couldn't handle it.

I think perfume might be ok, as long as it's in a container that's less than 3 ounces. Also, I think all your liquid containers have to be held in a plastic bag, so they can check them.

EDIT: Source: http://www.tsa.gov/travelers/airtrav...ted-items.shtm
http://www.usairways.com/awa/content...y/default.aspx

wow, holy shit. In 20 years you'll have to board the airplane naked.

Thanks.

alexander224 · #11 2008-07-18, 21:00

Quote:

Originally Posted by zuperxtreme View Post

wow, holy shit. In 20 years you'll have to board the airplane naked.

Thanks.

Nuclearwinter is happily anticipating the day.

jägermeister · #12 2008-07-18, 21:10

Remember: Water Bottles Are A Threat TO OUR NATIONAL SECURITY. SO if you don't like the rules, then FUCK OFF SIR.

Galbador · #13 2008-07-18, 21:29

Last few times I've been to the airport there have been signs saying that say "you can take liquids up to whatever millilitre, more than that will have to be poured away". And my uncle/boss told me this story about how someone he knew bought a bottle of whiskey, was told he couldn't take it onto the plane, so he sat and drank it rather than wasting it. He headed to wherever he was going in a drunken hazy bubble.

jägermeister · #14 2008-07-18, 21:34

i fucking hate these rules. i get enraged about the fucking 'pour out your soda' bullshit. is anyone safer because we poured out our fucking soda? NO. then what is the point? it really sickens me because it makes absolutely no sense. I want to go on akilling spree of TSA officials.

Synkk · #15 2008-07-18, 21:43

Quote:

Originally Posted by jägermeister View Post

i fucking hate these rules. i get enraged about the fucking 'pour out your soda' bullshit. is anyone safer because we poured out our fucking soda? NO. then what is the point? it really sickens me because it makes absolutely no sense. I want to go on akilling spree of TSA officials.

Terrorist alert!!! lawlz

They wont let you take on any tobacco products. If they find them you have to throw them away.

Silverfuck · #16 2008-07-18, 21:59

Don't try and bring any liquids over 3oz, or sharp bits and bobs such as nail clippers. And any cosmetics/toiletries have to be in a clear plastic bag.

This applies to a plane, or course. I think when crossing land borders you just aren't allowed to bring any contraband, produce, large sums of money, or illegal immigrants.

Failed Escape · #17 2008-07-18, 22:08

Don't bother wearing a belt with a metal buckle, I only had to take mine off while a security man stared at me.

reject · #18 2008-07-18, 22:09

Mexicans.

Issue313 · #19 2008-07-18, 22:14

Don't forget, the Department for State Security fingerprint and retina scan you now. Soon they'll ass-scan you as well. Think goatse.

DonMuttoni · #20 2008-07-18, 22:49

Quote:

Originally Posted by zuperxtreme View Post

wow, holy shit. In 20 years you'll have to board the airplane naked.

Thanks.

Nah, you get this nude body scan x-ray thing now..... They've got them in Schiphol atm and I'm sure a few other places, instead of metal detectors....

It's a large rotating door type device, you walk in one way, stand in the centre with your arms up, while the door closes and scanny thing runs around your body like those scanny things do....

I think it fried my last two sperm

13579 · #21 2008-07-18, 22:51

Quote:

Originally Posted by Silverfuck View Post

Don't try and bring any liquids over 3oz, or sharp bits and bobs such as nail clippers. And any cosmetics/toiletries have to be in a clear plastic bag.

This applies to a plane, or course. I think when crossing land borders you just aren't allowed to bring any contraband, produce, large sums of money, or illegal immigrants.

You aren't allowed to bring large sums of money? Nail clippers?

What the fuck is someone going to do with nail clippers?

Who do you think is going to win: 200+ passengers or the guy threatening them with the dull pointed end of the fingernail scraper thing on nailclippers?

Screw that. We need to make the &Totse airlines.

zuperxtreme · #22 2008-07-18, 22:58

Quote:

Originally Posted by DonMuttoni View Post

Nah, you get this nude body scan x-ray thing now..... They've got them in Schiphol atm and I'm sure a few other places, instead of metal detectors....

It's a large rotating door type device, you walk in one way, stand in the centre with your arms up, while the door closes and scanny thing runs around your body like those scanny things do....

I think it fried my last two sperm

Yeah, I read about those things. Man, what the fuck.

Someone needs to sue them for breach of privacy or something. Damn.

DonMuttoni · #23 2008-07-18, 23:09

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CGy8c8DGg_0

Thar be videos!

DerDrache · #24 2008-07-19, 02:10

They're real faggots when it comes to liquids. You can have small bottles in your carry-on, but anything bigger needs to be in your carry-on.

No weapons of course, and you can't have more than 1 lighter. Buy alcohol and cigs duty-free, ftw.

818DojaSmoka · #25 2008-07-19, 02:23

Quote:

Originally Posted by zuperxtreme View Post

What shouldn't be taken on board?

SNAKES, MOTHERFUCKER!

DuckWarri0r · #26 2008-07-19, 04:45

Quote:

Originally Posted by Galbador View Post

And my uncle/boss told me this story about how someone he knew bought a bottle of whiskey, was told he couldn't take it onto the plane, so he sat and drank it rather than wasting it. He headed to wherever he was going in a drunken hazy bubble.

You buy your alcohol after you have passed through security. You can take near any amount of fluids on the plane as long as they are bought airside. IE; your uncle/boss/lover is full of shit.

Now maybe the guy in the story is just an idiot and he packed a bottle of whisky in his carry on luggage, but that's just FUCKING RETARDED.

Illuvatar · #27 2008-07-19, 17:27

Quote:

Originally Posted by ShoeBong View Post

WTF are you trying to sneak into my country? You can't bring the normal type of things... drugs, weapons, children who aren't actually yours.

I laughed, so fuckin hard.

DL · #28 2008-07-19, 17:51

I just recently came back to America from Canada and they made sure to constantly remind us that we could not bring snails back to America. I wonder what kind of chaos bringing a Canadian snail to America would cause.

superspeedz · #29 2008-07-19, 18:34

Quote:

Originally Posted by DL View Post

I just recently came back to America from Canada and they made sure to constantly remind us that we could not bring snails back to America. I wonder what kind of chaos bringing a Canadian snail to America would cause.

In Canada, everything is winter resistant, Our super snails of cold death, will cause untold havoc onto your weak warm weathered eco system.

steve-o13 · #30 2008-07-19, 22:44

Quote:

Originally Posted by superspeedz View Post

In Canada, everything is winter resistant, Our super snails of cold death, will cause untold havoc onto your weak warm weathered eco system.

haha, this.