Last night I gave a guy a ride home after work and things started to steam up from the good night kiss. I was really into it until he started breaking up the make out sessions with questions and conversation. He seemed more nervous then I was, although he has been with like twenty plus woman and me only two men. He kept bringing up this fact, saying that I was "a good person" and like skirting around the real issue as to what was bothering him. He said that there is no one else in his life right now, and that he wants to.

He would start doing things, and then start talking. That made me start overthinking everything and it just made it ackward, which we both noticed I think. The main part I think was the major awkward moment was when he tried to get me to touch him but I pulled away. I mean, I want to but at the same time I don't want it to be awkward or whatever. I want to know what was bothering him/scaring him. Any ideas?

Edit: Plus, I didn't want the first time to be in a car... you know? Also it's definitely not easy to move around and shit so that added to the awkwardness. We would have gone inside I think but he didn't have power.

You just made it 10 times more awkward when you pulled your hand away...

But seriously,

HERPES. Stay away.

Sounds like some inner guilt on his part. Maybe he was brought up to believe sex is dirty etc. If you were brought Xian its real hard to get over the whole "Angry old man in the clouds who is gonna zap you if you bonk" thing" and you NEVER get rid of that Jimmy Cricket voice...

Have you been out with him a lot? Maybe he actually likes you, and thus doesn't want to have sex with you right away. Girls who seem 'easy' are not seen as long-term material, so maybe he's trying to not go too fast with you because he wants it to last. Or something.

He seemed more nervous then I was, although he has been with like twenty plus woman and me only two.


unless that is an interpretation error.
you are both once heterosexual males who turned homosexual for each other?

maybe he's not gay?

He is a guy, so he wants sex, but at the same time it sounds like he really likes you and maybe thinks that if the sex happens too early it may seem less serious and may loose you.

When I was starting to get involved with my current girlfriend, I was pretty down, pretty lonely and went though something similar to what I described above.

With the thing about you pulling away, if you don't make a big deal out of it then there will not be so much awkwardness... For instance, when he does it, just take his hand and put it on you somewhere and go back to whatever you were doing with the hand.

Open descussion over sex and such generally helps.

unless that is an interpretation error.
you are both once heterosexual males who turned homosexual for each other?

maybe he's not gay?

Ah dumbass, read my user profile. I'm female.

Plus, with the whole hand thing, I didn't want to touch him if he wasn't comfortable already, you know? Something was obviously not okay. I just don't know how to react tomorrow at work. I want to be the same, because it doesn't matter to me really. I don't want it to hurt his man ego or anything, plus it was sweet for him to be that thoughtful about it, even if it was kind of annoying during it.

Ah dumbass, read my user profile. I'm female.

have another look at your profile SIRLICKSALOT

Oh god! Stay away from him! He's got major issues with sex, you DO NOT want to experience an insecure sex partner TRUST ME! It's torture, they'll always be like that.

He has very fucked up view of sex, the fact you've had sex with much less people than he and have a better grasp is very interesting. I find that people who've had numerous partners and none being a meaningful relationship, the less apt they are at really knowing what GOOD sex is. I wouldn't be surprised if he got drunk a lot with intention of making sex easier for him.

That's also a BIG RED FLAG!

Stay away, stay away. If you keep yourself around it long enough, it can end up fucking YOU up.

Find a guy who has a good relationship with his penis.

Omg are you serious? Like and I thought I overthought everything. This really saddens me. It has to be something mentally bothering him. Like what would his fucked up view of sex be?

if he really really liked you and you made a move he would of said that he really really likes you and that he doesnt want to fuck things up... then he should of gone for it..

thats what I would of done...


maybe his penis is teeny? or he is insecure about it? or maybe he is still in the closet...

or maybe he thinks you are fucken ugly? but if you are skinny I dont see why not go for a fuck.. i mean I wouldnt put down free sex if I dont have to work for it..

Omg are you serious? Like and I thought I overthought everything. This really saddens me. It has to be something mentally bothering him. Like what would his fucked up view of sex be?

He's insecure, nervous, doesn't know if he's doing it right. The issue it he's not letting himself feel. He's thinking too much and that head over heart thing can REALLY suck when it comes to sexual activity. Sex and whatnot is for your body to take over, to stimulate your tactile senses, to enjoy yourself. It's that way so we ensure our line will continue to live. To be SO wrapped up in insecurity and anxiety to stop that natural flow is a very fucked up thing.

I feel bad for him. And if you two continue to be in similar awkward situations, I'd stop any forming sexual relationship. It's toxic and will leak into you.

He's insecure, nervous, doesn't know if he's doing it right. The issue it he's not letting himself feel. He's thinking too much and that head over heart thing can REALLY suck when it comes to sexual activity. Sex and whatnot is for your body to take over, to stimulate your tactile senses, to enjoy yourself. It's that way so we ensure our line will continue to live. To be SO wrapped up in insecurity and anxiety to stop that natural flow is a very fucked up thing.

I feel bad for him. And if you two continue to be in similar awkward situations, I'd stop any forming sexual relationship. It's toxic and will leak into you.

Well see, I've been with the opposite side of the spectrum as well and it wasn't great either. The two previous guys I have been with thought that what they were doing actualyl felt good and were too cocky about everything, in it for just themselves. Needless to say, actual intercourse only lasted like a minute and I never orgasmed from them.

It's ok to be insecure I suppose, I mean I am insecure around everyone. But I've never seen, or heard of a GUY, being SEXUALLY insecure in this way. Yeah the whole small penis, not lasting long thing is normal worrying, but this is like wow. Maybe the last person he slept with hurt his feelings or something. Or, like someone said, he is overthinking this one because it actually means something to him.

When he asked me, "What are you thinking?" for like the third time I was honest. I said, "I didn't want to be just another girl." He did that nervous laugh, and then he said, "You are a good person." I mean it's been a month and a half, and he still opens doors, pays, keeps up his appearance, respects me around others, and does the little surprises that usual fade after like a couple weeks. I don't know... he's trying really hard, but I like it. Not in a conceited way, but in that "Wow, he's really trying" way.

Well I suppose you should take into account what your expectations are for your sex life and how big of a role it plays in the grand scheme of your vision of a healthy relationship.

I've suffered through a 2 year HORRIBLE relationship with a guy like that and it's to date, one of my worst mistakes. It fucked me up in ways I didn't think I COULD be fucked up.

And I can totally empathize with you and how you're feeling right now. When I first met him I thought "How is this even POSSIBLE?" Every guy I've every been with up until that point was ALWAYS gung ho. And now I had to hear excuses about being tired, and this hurts, and we don't have time...

It was bullshit, I thought I could help him through his problems and he didn't want to help himself. So instead of the relationship benefiting him and his sex life and totally fucked me and mine up.

So, like I said, if this continues, I'd strongly advise you NOT to put yourself through such suffering. There will be other guys... Who want you to orgasm and don't have to think twice about it.

Maybe this.

No offense but I am not quite sure what you were trying to convey here.

Anyways, you seem to be concerned that he talked during the make-out sessions? Well, maybe he liked you so much that he'd much rather get to know you better instead of just groping you....or maybe he was simply a chatty type of person.

Just a thought.

No offense but I am not quite sure what you were trying to convey here.

Anyways, you seem to be concerned that he talked during the make-out sessions? Well, maybe he liked you so much that he'd much rather get to know you better instead of just groping you....or maybe he was simply a chatty type of person.

Just a thought.

We've been talking for about a month and a half now. I am the first girl (I have heard this from many people in the restaurant that have been catching on) that he has actually took time to get to know instead of like just taking me home to drink or have sex or whatever. I mean, I thought that I would have to be the one to say no, that's too far but he did which threw me off a little. I just hope he comes in today so that I can see how he feels about the other night (if he's embarrassed, if he's brushing it off, or if he didn't even notice the awkwardness and it was just me).

my guess. you were messing around and it was going no where because you just sat there like a dumbass waiting for him to do it all. he didnt know if kissing meant he can jam a finger in your ass so he didnt escalate, tried to talk and gauge your level of interest but then you pulled your hand away and he figured 'fuck it'.

lol

guys dont overthink, you overthink yourself into thinking they overthought when in reality YOU are the one overthinking

Ahhhh fuck I hate this shit.

Ahhhh fuck I hate this shit.

What shit do you hate? The attitude he has towards the issue or when that happens to you? Everyone overthinks, men and women, it's just that men don't like to admit it most of the time, which makes this situation really weird.

I went over to his house today after work again and it got a little further, however he stopped it again and then started cuddling, and whispered, "I can wait for you." In my mind, I was like, "Hold up...." It just doesn't make any sense. Is he trying to read my mind, or does he actually genuinely care and doesn't want to fuck up? It's just so weird to not be the one saying "Stop."

Is he a virgin? Maybe he's worried he won't be able to sexually please you or something, before I lost my virginity it was the hardest, I turned a really hot girl before I lost my virginity because I was freaked out that I would instantly cum and she would just laugh or something. Just ask him straight up if he's interested.

What shit do you hate? The attitude he has towards the issue or when that happens to you? Everyone overthinks, men and women, it's just that men don't like to admit it most of the time, which makes this situation really weird.


I hate the situation that he described.

What shit do you hate? The attitude he has towards the issue or when that happens to you? Everyone overthinks, men and women, it's just that men don't like to admit it most of the time, which makes this situation really weird.

I went over to his house today after work again and it got a little further, however he stopped it again and then started cuddling, and whispered, "I can wait for you." In my mind, I was like, "Hold up...." It just doesn't make any sense. Is he trying to read my mind, or does he actually genuinely care and doesn't want to fuck up? It's just so weird to not be the one saying "Stop."

and of course you said 'i dont want to wait, im totally ready for you now' right?

What shit do you hate? The attitude he has towards the issue or when that happens to you? Everyone overthinks, men and women, it's just that men don't like to admit it most of the time, which makes this situation really weird.

I went over to his house today after work again and it got a little further, however he stopped it again and then started cuddling, and whispered, "I can wait for you." In my mind, I was like, "Hold up...." It just doesn't make any sense. Is he trying to read my mind, or does he actually genuinely care and doesn't want to fuck up? It's just so weird to not be the one saying "Stop."

Been there done that. My entire teenagehood (while I was single, so about 2 years) I always had to stop dudes because they were trying to go to far. In my mind it didn't make sense, I was thinking "Isn't just making out and touching fun? Why does it HAVE to be sex? Why can't we just fool around?" Dude, always pushing the limits..

THEN recently after I got out of my last relationship (2 years of absolutely disappointing sex) I was on the prowl to get some good dick. So... I started talking to this hot guy with the sole intention of fucking and nothing more. I thought his personality was pretty lame, but figured he just wanted the same thing.

Well, we ended up getting drunk and it turns out he was packing. I was ready to jump on that shit and then comes the line, "I don't want to fuck you tonight, you're too cool of a chick."

I swear, my proverbial dick got soft and shriveled up. If I could've raped him I would have. Instead I stayed for a little while and "cuddled". And never hung out with him again.

Murphey's Law or somethin' like that...

If I could've raped him I would have. Instead I stayed for a little while and "cuddled". And never hung out with him again.

..

haha now you know how we feel when it's all looking good and you feed us that BS

of course i always resist the urge

This seems really plausible.

What shit do you hate? The attitude he has towards the issue or when that happens to you? Everyone overthinks, men and women, it's just that men don't like to admit it most of the time, which makes this situation really weird.

I went over to his house today after work again and it got a little further, however he stopped it again and then started cuddling, and whispered, "I can wait for you." In my mind, I was like, "Hold up...." It just doesn't make any sense. Is he trying to read my mind, or does he actually genuinely care and doesn't want to fuck up? It's just so weird to not be the one saying "Stop."

Odd, maybe that is the game he pulls on girls so they give it up quicker? Who knows, that sounds pretty weird....?

Been there done that. My entire teenagehood (while I was single, so about 2 years) I always had to stop dudes because they were trying to go to far. In my mind it didn't make sense, I was thinking "Isn't just making out and touching fun? Why does it HAVE to be sex? Why can't we just fool around?" Dude, always pushing the limits..

THEN recently after I got out of my last relationship (2 years of absolutely disappointing sex) I was on the prowl to get some good dick. So... I started talking to this hot guy with the sole intention of fucking and nothing more. I thought his personality was pretty lame, but figured he just wanted the same thing.

Well, we ended up getting drunk and it turns out he was packing. I was ready to jump on that shit and then comes the line, "I don't want to fuck you tonight, you're too cool of a chick."

I swear, my proverbial dick got soft and shriveled up. If I could've raped him I would have. Instead I stayed for a little while and "cuddled". And never hung out with him again.

Murphey's Law or somethin' like that...

Blah about sums you up.

I feel like mojo and carbon killed this thread. no help at all... just ditch him? because you yourself have had a bad experience? wtf? not all guys are the same, just maybe the dipshits you fuck with...

carbon? why do you always just post your feelings about peoples posts? no one gives two shits how you feel about what somone has said, no one is talking to you. (and i know this makes me sound hypocritical but still... stfu)



sirlicks,

analyze what happened that day and think about it. maybe he really likes you and thinks you arent taht type of girl, and since you wanted it you maybe approached him too strong so that made him over think. which made you over think. you shouldn't of pulled your hand away, you should of told him to stop talking and just kissed him..

and when he told you that he can wait you should of told him how you feel and that you are ready..

stop beating around the bush and just tell him how you feel. why is it that guys always have to do all the work, if you want the dick then just step up to the plate and make sure he knows exactly how you feel. if he doesnt give you the dick then, then try to figure out exactly how he feels and what the fuck is up.

and you still havent answered weather he is a virgin or not. you heard stories that he has been with girls but that doesnt mean shit. he might be a virgin. he might of bullshitted his way through all those girls like he does you because he is nervous because of his virginity.

if he isnt a virgin then quit beating around the bush and tell him EXACTLY how you feel.

Ok, I know he's not a virgin for sure because he was in a huge 6 year relationship with a woman before he moved here. He has two kids, but they live on the other side of the country with the mother, who doesn't really care to see him but still lets him talk to the boys. So it's not like he can't commit, he did for six years. What teen-twenty year old would stick around that long? He won't talk about the relationship, although I've never really probed at it. That's not my business. It's been a good two years since that relationship though.

I think deep down inside he is really sensitive, but he puts on this machoism around work and his friends to cover it up. And I will admit, that I am too shy when it comes to telling people what I want. My famous line is, "I don't know" whenever someone asks me to make a decision. I guess I just need to grow some balls and step up the next time it happens. Do guys like when the girl takes charge and flips them over and shit? I don't want to look like a whore, but apparently I have to do something. I want to do my part. Maybe if I step up he will feel more comfortable with me.

I guess now I am switching this topic to what I can do to step it up, like in the sexual aspect. What are the little things that turns guys on along with the obvious (like where to be touched), and what will make him comfortable enough to just move with it?

Ok, I know he's not a virgin for sure because he was in a huge 6 year relationship with a woman before he moved here. He has two kids, but they live on the other side of the country with the mother, who doesn't really care to see him but still lets him talk to the boys. So it's not like he can't commit, he did for six years. What teen-twenty year old would stick around that long? He won't talk about the relationship, although I've never really probed at it. That's not my business. It's been a good two years since that relationship though.

I think deep down inside he is really sensitive, but he puts on this machoism around work and his friends to cover it up. And I will admit, that I am too shy when it comes to telling people what I want. My famous line is, "I don't know" whenever someone asks me to make a decision. I guess I just need to grow some balls and step up the next time it happens. Do guys like when the girl takes charge and flips them over and shit? I don't want to look like a whore, but apparently I have to do something. I want to do my part. Maybe if I step up he will feel more comfortable with me.

I guess now I am switching this topic to what I can do to step it up, like in the sexual aspect. What are the little things that turns guys on along with the obvious (like where to be touched), and what will make him comfortable enough to just move with it?

jesus are you fucking 12? of course guys like when you dont act like an annoying cunt by saying 'i dont know' 50 times a night. of course guys like when women are sexually aggressive. you dont need to do little things, just fucking fuck him. for christs sake how can this be so difficult for you to figure out?

What are you talking about? Fucking idiot.

Ok, I know he's not a virgin for sure because he was in a huge 6 year relationship with a woman before he moved here. He has two kids, but they live on the other side of the country with the mother, who doesn't really care to see him but still lets him talk to the boys. So it's not like he can't commit, he did for six years. What teen-twenty year old would stick around that long? He won't talk about the relationship, although I've never really probed at it. That's not my business. It's been a good two years since that relationship though.

I think deep down inside he is really sensitive, but he puts on this machoism around work and his friends to cover it up. And I will admit, that I am too shy when it comes to telling people what I want. My famous line is, "I don't know" whenever someone asks me to make a decision. I guess I just need to grow some balls and step up the next time it happens. Do guys like when the girl takes charge and flips them over and shit? I don't want to look like a whore, but apparently I have to do something. I want to do my part. Maybe if I step up he will feel more comfortable with me.

I guess now I am switching this topic to what I can do to step it up, like in the sexual aspect. What are the little things that turns guys on along with the obvious (like where to be touched), and what will make him comfortable enough to just move with it?

New information just made you a whore.

jesus are you fucking 12? of course guys like when you dont act like an annoying cunt by saying 'i dont know' 50 times a night. of course guys like when women are sexually aggressive. you dont need to do little things, just fucking fuck him. for christs sake how can this be so difficult for you to figure out?

Look, if you and Carbon don't have anything productive to say then don't say anything at all. All you two do is stay on Totse all fucking day long trying to make other people look like idiots when really you are the only ones that look like idiots because you have no fucking life. It's hard to believe that someone who spends that much time on the internet has any sex life of his or her own.

Look, if you and Carbon don't have anything productive to say then don't say anything at all. All you two do is stay on Totse all fucking day long trying to make other people look like idiots when really you are the only ones that look like idiots because you have no fucking life. It's hard to believe that someone who spends that much time on the internet has any sex life of his or her own.


blah blah blah are you seriously too retarded to know how to get a guy to fuck you?

blah blah blah are you seriously too retarded to know how to get a guy to fuck you?

to us guys it seems obvious, but I swear I know so many girls who have no clue on weather a guy likes them or not...



there are alot of ways. tell him you wanna go hang out.. movies, party, club, beach etc... when the night is over and he drops you off tell him that you dont want the night to finish so soon, invite him inside. offer him a drink, and try to bring up sexual conversations, sit down really close to him and see how he reacts.. look him straight in the eyes and if he tries avoiding taking things further give him a dirty look and just keep trying to get closer to him... then if he asks what are you doing then just look him in the eye and tell him what do you think I'm trying to do, then grab his hand and tell him to follow you, take him to your bedroom and take it from there...

if he shows signs of not wanting to do anything, just straight up ask him why he is acting like this. that would lead the conversation to you two expressing your feelings about each other.



EDIT: i swear to god carbon, I hate you so much.

Look, if you and Carbon don't have anything productive to say then don't say anything at all. All you two do is stay on Totse all fucking day long trying to make other people look like idiots when really you are the only ones that look like idiots because you have no fucking life. It's hard to believe that someone who spends that much time on the internet has any sex life of his or her own.

All day? Lol, that seems a bit exaggerated...oh, and how does someone who stays on computers all day have a sex life? I don't know...ask any man between the ages of 20 - 35 who have kids.

Also the reason you can't see most of the reasoning behind the criticism is because you're an immature child. Grow up, learn, and all the mean while keep your legs shut. You might just learn something. ;-)

to us guys it seems obvious, but I swear I know so many girls who have no clue on weather a guy likes them or not...



there are alot of ways. tell him you wanna go hang out.. movies, party, club, beach etc... when the night is over and he drops you off tell him that you dont want the night to finish so soon, invite him inside. offer him a drink, and try to bring up sexual conversations, sit down really close to him and see how he reacts.. look him straight in the eyes and if he tries avoiding taking things further give him a dirty look and just keep trying to get closer to him... then if he asks what are you doing then just look him in the eye and tell him what do you think I'm trying to do, then grab his hand and tell him to follow you, take him to your bedroom and take it from there...

if he shows signs of not wanting to do anything, just straight up ask him why he is acting like this. that would lead the conversation to you two expressing your feelings about each other.



EDIT: i swear to god carbon, I hate you so much.

Lol, keep hating, because I'm going to be here forever, like your absence of testicles.

Lol, keep hating, because I'm going to be here forever,

We believe that you will be on a message board forever, carbon.

Alright, I only read 1/4 of the posts here, but I have to say it sounds like he feels guilty, like he feels that he would be "spoiling" you if he has sex with you.

He may feel guilty about having sex with so many women. I promise you he probably didn't have much respect for most of those women. The whole "fuck em and dump em" scenario comes to mind.

So now in his mind by having sex with you he won't be showing the proper "respect" for you. In his fucked up way, avoiding sex is how he shows he cares about you. That's probably why he mentioned that he thinks you're a good person.

Reminds me of the movie "All the Real Girls" actually...

PS- Or maybe he just has Herpes...

He might've been nervous. He might've been trying to gauge how far he could go with you. He might've not wanted it to be awkward at work if you rejected him completely.

The reason doesn't matter. Stop trying to analyze the situation. Ask him to hang out or do something, a movie, a few drinks, whatever. Next time you hang out YOU initiate kissing. Initiate touching. Just keep escalating it. Put his hands on you. Take your shirt off. Loosen his belt. This'll show you whether or not he's going to fuck you. Report back with how it goes.

We believe that you will be on a message board forever, carbon.

Good. By the way, how IS your life going?

All day? Lol, that seems a bit exaggerated...oh, and how does someone who stays on computers all day have a sex life? I don't know...ask any man between the ages of 20 - 35 who have kids.

Also the reason you can't see most of the reasoning behind the criticism is because you're an immature child. Grow up, learn, and all the mean while keep your legs shut. You might just learn something. ;-)



Lol, keep hating, because I'm going to be here forever, like your absence of testicles.

That doesn't help your argument at all as to why you stay online all day. Not all men 20-35 with kids stay on the internet all day. Most of them have jobs and get involved in the outside world. And I can take criticism just fine, but only when it's legitimate. You can't just come in to a thread and obviously just state the opposite of all the other posters and make everything about you. God, get a fucking life, you might just learn something.

That doesn't help your argument at all as to why you stay online all day. Not all men 20-35 with kids stay on the internet all day. Most of them have jobs and get involved in the outside world. And I can take criticism just fine, but only when it's legitimate. You can't just come in to a thread and obviously just state the opposite of all the other posters and make everything about you. God, get a fucking life, you might just learn something.

You really are a fucking idiot. The hint was so clearly stated so that maybe you wouldn't look like an ass. I am not on totse all day, check my average post count per day. Then shut the fuck up.

You really are a fucking idiot. The hint was so clearly stated so that maybe you wouldn't look like an ass. I am not on totse all day, check my average post count per day. Then shut the fuck up.



Holy shit

You really are a fucking idiot. The hint was so clearly stated so that maybe you wouldn't look like an ass. I am not on totse all day, check my average post count per day. Then shut the fuck up.

yet I still hate you... oh so much

yet I still hate you... oh so much

Dude, save your breath, I could give a shit if you hate me. Take it in because hating me won't bring you anything you want in life.