Mine was yesterday

'bout 3 years ago
........ and she was ugly......
fun tho

Yesterday, 3 times.

my laptop is on her back as we speak

April 30, so a bit more than a month ago.
A tiny little blonde german girl, 'twas niiiiiice.

about a week ago. Tried doing it at a 90 degree angle, with her on the bed and me standing. It worked. It worked very, very well. :D

Hardly counts but I got a blowjob in the toilets of the club last night.

Columbians know how to suck cock good.

A couple of weeks ago dam I need to get laid!

A little after the body started decomposing.

last month...AGH!!! that was such a mistake.

never again will I be a wingman...

Never.

Fail.

meh...

I can't remember, last week sometime. It was sweet, we came at the same time.

This morning, slept at my girlfriends house.

About a week ago

'bout a month ago.









And I have a girl...

Sometime late last night/early this morning.

About 1 and a half year ago.

Yesterday, and it was sexy, because I was laying down, and he went from missionary to kindof kneeling and fucking me without losing rhythm, and I was tweeking his nipples and he was rubbing my clit, and pam pam pam and then I came and I had spasms in my right arm and was all mmm mm oooh oooh making those retarded porn noises, but I wasn´t doing it on purpose, it just felt good.

The end.

Damn you all.

/thread

Damn you all.

/thread

Cmooonnnnn, how long?

Almost 2 years ago now. I really suck at chatting up girls, I think my standards are too high cos if I was a girl I'd want to fuck me.

Last Saturday, I think. But it wasn't as satisfying as it could have been because my boyfriend has no dick control. Eddie Murphy was right...

Cut it off and use it whenever you please?

As soon as a man gets a woman to cum, he swears he's in control the rest of his life? :(

Er..maybe 2-3 weeks ago?

Haha a little under 5 months? yea sweet.

what time is it?

3 this afternoon

next time?

as soon as i click post(no kidding my girlfriend is watching me type this)

About 3 years ago, but I managed to grab an ass about 14 months ago...

Damn you all.

/thread

Agreed.

About a month or so ago.

'bout 3 years ago

About 3 years ago

That's kind of weird, I was thinking I would come in here and have the longest time since I got laid, and it was summer 2005 so about 3 years ago also...

Two days ago. It was good sex.

October. It was sloppy and messy drunken sex too.

Last time I had a good shag was St Paddy's day, a year ago.

I really need to sort this out.

That's kind of weird, I was thinking I would come in here and have the longest time since I got laid, and it was summer 2005 so about 3 years ago also...

I'm glad I'm not alone on this one *bottom lip wobbles*

Mine was yesterday

why do you feel the need to put this out there



about a week ago. Tried doing it at a 90 degree angle, with her on the bed and me standing. It worked. It worked very, very well. :D

wow thats very original

Almost 2 years ago now. I really suck at chatting up girls, I think my standards are too high cos if I was a girl I'd want to fuck me.

well obviously girls dont want to fuck you

what time is it?

3 this afternoon

next time?

as soon as i click post(no kidding my girlfriend is watching me type this)

what the fuck are you doing on this if your girlfriend is with you

you are all rookies

Hey thelaz, please teach us how to be as cool as you. Unlike you, no matter what I do, my penis isn't 13 inches, I don't have huge rippling muscles, people don't confuse me for Thor, and lingerie models aren't begging me to sign their tits. Please halp!

April 27. Won't be getting any until July 19.

Long distance relationship.

20 months

/suicides

Yesterday

20 months

/suicides

No.. this isn't going to happen to me.. I swear it!

I'm too good looking for that..

Two months or so. Sigh.

wow thats very original

It's original to me. I've no shame in saying that.

yesterday!

lulz

Appointments.

This man speaks the truth.

yesterday!

Hehe, good going. :)

Im getting laid , right now.

Laptop on her back fuckig her doggy FTW.

She's steady enough to support a laptop? Wow that sounds like wild sex!!!

She's steady enough to support a laptop? Wow that sounds like wild sex!!!

That usually happens when they aren't conscious.

about a month and a half ago

never

2 1/2 weeks, which was sadly the worst experience to date. Then got dumped the week after. Fail.

Approximately one week ago. Good times. :)

Hehe, good going. :)

uhhuh.

next weekend should be hapening again.

hooray!

This morning.

almost a week ago. shit was fun. girl was kinda mediocre, but she was into some weird shit, so it was all better. i can now say i like candle wax.

Does she liked to get choked?

At least every other day for the past 2 months. Im an italian stallion :)

despite my name Im not russian.

Few days ago. Hotel + crack + girl who has never smoked crack and was all innocent + alcohol + xanax = I corrupted the shit out of that poor girl :(. I've known her for quite some time too. But before that it was about 2 months or so. I, for the longest time didn't want to fuck anyone else besides my now ex gf. I was so in love with her etc lolololololol. It's so sad I need to consume massive amounts of sleeping pills :(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:( STILL FUCK.

Few days ago. Hotel + crack + girl who has never smoked crack and was all innocent + alcohol + xanax = I corrupted the shit out of that poor girl :(. I've known her for quite some time too. But before that it was about 2 months or so. I, for the longest time didn't want to fuck anyone else besides my now ex gf. I was so in love with her etc lolololololol. It's so sad I need to consume massive amounts of sleeping pills :(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(: STILL FUCK.

you are bad person.
crack= not good to give to noobs.
also not good to be giving to someone you want to fuck.

wow your choice in women and lifestyle drastically increases your chances of getting teh aidz. Enjoy your nasty nigger pussy

wow your choice in women and lifestyle drastically increases your chances of getting teh aidz. Enjoy your nasty nigger pussy


Hahahahahahaa. This girl is really a good girl, I knew her way back in the day. She's kinda nerdy like me. Well, I didn't pressure her into crack, I planned on smoking it myself but she wanted to do it since it was with me. It was her first time ever doing any form of hard drugs. I know it was a bad choice, but I don't know I can't seem to make any right choices since I lost my previous gf :(

Hahahahahahaa. This girl is really a good girl, I knew her way back in the day. She's kinda nerdy like me. Well, I didn't pressure her into crack, I planned on smoking it myself but she wanted to do it since it was with me. It was her first time ever doing any form of hard drugs. I know it was a bad choice, but I don't know I can't seem to make any right choices since I lost my previous gf :(


lol maybe you should stop smoking crack?

Does she liked to get choked?

not really. more like candles and play piercings (which is something I really like). she doesn't like breath play, he sister hung herself when a few years back, so that is a no-go for her.

he sister hung herself when a few years back,
hanged*
It's a common grammatical mistake.

Last night.

23 years ago

i mostly fuck kids now

then you would still be getting laid.

laid=to have sex.

have sex=fuck

if one fucks kids, then it can be determined that one gets laid, albeit with kids.

one question though.
why do you have carnal relations with the young of a goat?

Update: 15 minutes ago.
Score one for Silverfuck.

what the fuck are you doing on this if your girlfriend is with you

you are all rookies



i was waiting on her to get ready(lock door, close blinds etc etc)

This just in ,

I'm having sex right now , again.

hanged*
It's a common grammatical mistake.

well, you hang up clothes. and she hanged herself with a belt and the bar in her closet. it wasn't that self-asphyxiation shit to get off, she left a note. fucking sucked to hear that. the chick was cool. but just kinda off in the head. constant depression.

but a new update for this thread. got some head today, so that half-counts.

A week ago.

11 hours ago. I'm still really sore down there.

In your ass ?

10 months ago. That's really not good.

Omg U Noobs Nevar Herd Of Rapeh

Lurk In Allies Moar

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qvLjZLWdTeU

valentines day

valentines day

pwnt.

I'm a girl. Rape might be difficult.

I'm a girl. Rape might be difficult.

So just get raped?

Nobody has ever tried.

Last night.

In your ass ? Well there was anal, vaginal and spanking so yeah.

Oh man this thread reeks of desperation.

cos you're not getting any?
:p

Yesterday.

After 10 sexless months.... I spent pretty much ALL day today shagging a male friend of mine. And he was amazingly good. However now it hurts to sit down lmao.

saturday night.