Well i am going out with some girl and its not one of those situations where i think i am in love with her because i KNOW i am in love with her. The problem is she shows lack of effort towards me and i highly doubt she feels the same way. It hurts me a lot when we fight bout things that are usually stupid and makes me feel uneasy. She always tells me she loves me so much etc just i feel like she doesn't care if we are in a relationship or not and would not even be bothered trying to save it if it goes downhill a bit. I just want to know if there is any chance of her really feeling for me much or if i am basically fucked and will get dumped in a month or two and then have no one. She is a nice girl and i don't think shed ever intend to hurt me but for some reason i just feel she will and i want to know how she really feels bout me. I really really love her and the last thing i want is for her to leave me.
Suggestions?

have you tried asking her?

Tell us how old you both are/how long you've been together.

don't call her for a while and see if she calls you first.

I've been in that situation.

It ends with being dumped in a month or two. If you really love her, you'll fight tooth and nail to save it after she tries to breakup. And if you try hard enough, it'll work. And then a few months later, it'll go downhill again and it'll be time for another breakup. You'll have to struggle and sacrifice for it once again, and it'll fix it for another few months. The cycle continues until you've just had enough...and you can't fight anymore. It took me 18 months.

Consider this: In every relationship, theres always one person who has more invested. Who cares more, sacrifices more, tries more, etc...

Sometimes the difference isn't enough to matter, but when its significant...you're just better off bailing out early.

I've been in that situation.


Consider this: In every relationship, theres always one person who has more invested. Who cares more, sacrifices more, tries more, etc...



I guess the perfect relationship is one where that's not case.

I'm kind of in the same situation, exact same situation in fact and I'm the one (have always been the one) that wasn't putting any effort in. And it hurts me a lot :x I think it's because I wanted to see that she wanted it as much as me I guess, I wanted to see her put the effort in. I haven't talked to her in days now and I called her today and she didn't answer Oh wait she just called and I called back twice 2 seconds later and she doesn't answer me now I HATE THIS SHIT lololol. Just tell her, it's not worth going crazy psycho analyzing.

I guess the perfect relationship is one where that's not case.

A student of socrates, eh?

amen!!

have you tried asking her?
She will just lie...:p
EDIT:
(Second Quote...forogt who said it)

Do you know what love really is mate?

She may love you... just not as a lover...

Have you had sex?

Consider this: In every relationship, theres always one person who has more invested. Who cares more, sacrifices more, tries more, etc...

Sometimes the difference isn't enough to matter, but when its significant...you're just better off bailing out early.
I beg not to interfere kind sirs, but wasn't it You that, some months ago, also posted on totse saying "In a relationship, there will always be someone who loves the other more" or something along those lines?

Eh, is there any other way out of such a system? My GF, whom I love dearly, is suspected by none other then myself, to be the one who loves less in our relationship, and that she's more likely in it not because of me, but because I give her support and attention while nobody else will. So essentially, I feel I love her more than life but she loves me as 'the newest boyfriend to give her his time and support', therefor I feel like utter shit.

iv been dating her for almost half a yr and i have never had sex with her -.- yes i ask her many times she says really basic things with no meaning in them. Just don't understand you guys are right it makes u feel like utter shit

Dump her. She sounds like a dumb ho.

Bitches ain't shit but ho's and tricks.

...There are exceptions, maybe, she isn't one.

she is very loyal don't think she would ever cheat just she acts like she does not care bout me just dosent show any affection.

she is very loyal don't think she would ever cheat just she acts like she does not care bout me just dosent show any affection.

exactly!

You can't have a serious, intimate relationship without sex.

I was going out with a girl like you - she invested more in the relationship, she 'loved me more' etc...I think thats just a nice way of saying clingy. I will give you a tip though - if you do break up, LET HER GO - do not be clingy, wanting to be 'friends' - IT DOESNT WORK

that is all

she dumped me .......

im so depressed want to kill my self but afraid il just bring others down wit me.
i duno where to go from here.

I beg not to interfere kind sirs, but wasn't it You that, some months ago, also posted on totse saying "In a relationship, there will always be someone who loves the other more" or something along those lines?

Eh, is there any other way out of such a system? My GF, whom I love dearly, is suspected by none other then myself, to be the one who loves less in our relationship, and that she's more likely in it not because of me, but because I give her support and attention while nobody else will. So essentially, I feel I love her more than life but she loves me as 'the newest boyfriend to give her his time and support', therefor I feel like utter shit.

I don't understand your point exactly, but yes. I was the one who said that. And as far as I can tell, it fits right in with what i've said in this post. And i've been right where you are, and I know...guys like us have the superman complex. That if we try hard enough we can accomplish anything. But thats just not the case. Relationships go both ways. They have to put in just as much effort as you do for it to work. You just cant do it on your own. Its natural to feel like shit, and even though you're going to go find another girl that will treat you in EXACTLY the same manner, eventually...you'll man up and realize what it is you want in a woman, and you wont settle for anything less.

So unless things change, this relationship is doomed? With me giving everything I've got and her still treating me as just a boyfriend?

Or maybe it's the other way around, maybe I'm too demanding? Small stuff sets me off, stuff like she going for a smoke with friends I consider pussies and asking me if I wanna come. I wanna be with her, sure I wanna come, but I hate to be around that pussy parade. Or her having a great fucking dilema, because "she promised" her friend (a bi female) she'd go with her for half the summer, whereas now she wants to go with me and she's all like "I don't wanna go with that friend, I wanna be with you, but I promised....". This is the second time like that, the first was a really risky trip all over europe with some fag, but she finally refused him, but she was afraid he was gonna 'yell on her, since she promised him company...'.

And yeah, that sets me off on the inside, because I really feel worse, like shit, like someone taken for granted. I'll have a talk with her in the near future about it, because well, thing is, my energy is slowly running out.

But my question is, am I too demanding maybe? Hell, I can act like the superman, be perfect, but should I demand the same of her?.

Oh no she left you! Didn't see that one coming xD