Perhaps there is no subject more personal, more emotional, and more difficult to deal with than that of a spouse who cheats. First of all, there is absolutely NO justification for cheating on your spouse. Point blank. It is a sin in God's eyes. Man has tried in his own feeble way to categorize sin. Bad sins, and really bad sins. Sin is sin in the eyes of God, no matter what it involves, since sin is an act of rebellion towards God.

There is no arguing however, because of the intimate and sensitive nature of adultery, it is a highly visible sin because of the raw emotions involved. Having laid that foundation, let me look for a minute at this topic from both sides. That of the person who has committed adultery, and that of the spouse who has been cheated on.

First of all, for anyone who has committed adultery, you have to understand some basic issues. First is that what you have done is a sin in God's eyes, no matter how you may try to justify or spin it. There is NO circumstance that makes adultery acceptable. Second, anyone who has been involved in this type of behavior knows deep down inside the incredible price you end up paying, for what boils down to a few moments of pleasure. Like all sin, you pay a very high price for what you end up receiving.

Having dealt with this issue in literally thousands of cases over the years, I can assure you that there is NEVER a positive ending. These relationships, due to the foundation on which they are built, never last long, and if they do, are never filled with the joy and peace life has to offer. Remember, God cannot and will not bless sin. So you go off into this new relationship on a foundation of sin and deceit, without the blessings of God. How can you ever expect it to work?!

So what is the answer? Simple. Repent, get right with God, and then begin the long, long process of getting back into a correct relationship with your spouse. This will take lots of time, lots of effort, and things will never be 100% the way they were before. However, God can heal and help you and your spouse find His peace and love again to live many happy years together. It is not hopeless.

But you have to be willing to repent, get right with God, and then take the steps necessary to get right with your spouse. God is able to do all things, and you will need His help and strength each step of the way, but He will honor your commitment. Don't give up, that is what the enemy wants you to do.

For the spouse that has been cheated on, it becomes a time for you to find a level of faith and trust in God you never experienced before. Because of the deep hurt and wounds, God is your only source of strength during this time. While the Bible in the New Testament does give a scriptural "out" in a marriage when adultery is involved, the reading of the complete Word still proclaims it is God's plan for one man, one woman, one lifetime. That must be your goal.

You will need to spend much time in prayer for your spouse. They need your prayers to overcome the wrongs they have done. You will need to spend much time in prayer with the Lord to keep in focus that you are loved. Many spouses who have been cheated on feel that they are to blame. Listen. You CANNOT control the actions of your spouse. You CANNOT be responsible for what they do. Quit blaming yourself for their actions! Know that in Christ you are loved and worthy.

Lastly, you will need LOTS of prayer to have a forgiving heart. This, of course, is the most difficult hurdle to overcome. It is not possible in our strength. Only God can give you a forgiving heart to go on. Ultimately, the key will be in your focus on the Lord. Your faith, your trust in the Lord will be tested and stretched. It is in times like this when your faith becomes very real.

There is absolutely no way in just a few paragraphs I can deal with an issue like this that can fill a library full of books. I have tried to give you the bottom line from both sides of this issue. It will all boil down to each spouse's commitment to the Lord to overcome this part of your life. The cheating individual will need the Lord to overcome the sin committed and get back into a right relationship with the spouse, and the spouse will need the Lord to overcome the intense emotions and feelings to allow the spouse back into a place of trust in the relationship.

There is no way things can ever be the same again; however, the Lord is still in the healing business, and He can help work things out so there is still a loving, fruitful relationship for many years to come. The key is trusting God and not giving up.

I love you, and I care about you deeply. I realize from all of the emails we get each day how prevalent this issue is. I will be praying for you today, both those who have committed adultery and those spouses who have been cheated on. I realize the heartache and pain you are going through. If I can help in any way, don't hesitate to email me; I will do my best. I cannot do marriage counseling over email, but I can pray and give some basic direction.

My main point today is that God is still on the throne, He is still in control, and despite our rebellion.....He will have the final word. Jesus said, "be of good cheer, for I have overcome the world." That includes the sins in this world like adultery.

This forum is Sex & Affection. Take all your God/Bible bullshit somewhere else, maybe here: http://www.totse.com/community/forumdisplay.php?f=163

Peace.

It's about a cheating spouse, so it belongs here.

There was no need for profanity.

god isnt real.

dumb.

You're a shitty troll. Zero lulz.

Too Long/Didn't Read.

QFT..

Tl/dr/gtfo

Rephrase your argument to not involve God.

I don't have anything against the Big Guy myself (except for the fact that I was in a freak fender-bender today, missed my date, and have to pay a shitload of money) but if you're talking about a relationship working or not, try and use things we can see and measure, like psychology or sexology, not theology.

Nothing wrong with God, but don't say "a piece of paper tells me that those who cheat can't love", because actually, in practice, you may find otherwise.

Titanic made cheating cool.
<3

Bla bla bla I dont give a fuck if your 'god' cares or not.


As someone said, it would be good if you could rephrase your argument to be without the god bits.

Really, why would the oppinion of your imaginary best friend* matter ?


*god.


MGCBTSOOYG /moved

Copypasta.

If you want to go religious, the Bible actually says that adultery is the only valid reason for divorce. You should include that instead of making it seem like God forces people to stay with their cheating spouse.

Do you honestly want to know what laws the Bible has concerning spousal affairs? They are considerably retarded.

It was already blatantly obvious, but hard proof (http://ritten.wordpress.com/2008/01/21/repent-sin-aint-worth-losing-your-life-over/) is always nice. Ctrl+f for any line from Rolloffle's post. It's all there. Copypasta.

In before lock.

God did not like cheating so much he ordered his followers to stone the cheater to death.

God was also cool with having more than one wife. This wasn't cheating b/c as we all know in the bible women are nothing more than property, and inheriently evil property at that.

God was a fan of rape though. You were not killed if you raped a chick and THEN married her.

Personally I would rather be cheated on than...you know...RAPED. Just a difference of opinion between me and your imaginary friend.

Point is, the bible is the LAST place anyone should turn to for anything, but especially for matters of the heart.

I am growing tired of Roffle's annoying and unimaginative trolling.

vote to kill or ban, all in favor say "eye".

I am growing tired of Roffle's annoying and unimaginative trolling.

vote to kill or ban, all in favor say "eye".

The fact you invoked "God" in your argument is automatic FAIL.

His entire post was just copy/pasted from that site.

It's Rolloffle.

What were you expecting?

Seriously though, I hope Rolloffle was infracted for this. It's technically spam, as it was originally posted in S&A, and is apparently copypasta.

Unfortunately, trolling is not an infraction-worthy offense, as it can be difficult to distinguish between a troll post and a genuine post at times.

Even though we all know Rolloffle is a troll.

Unfortunately, trolling is not an infraction-worthy offense, as it can be difficult to distinguish between a troll post and a genuine post at times.


This.

Rolloffle, please limit your copypasta here in this forum and find more imaginative ways to troll God throughout the rest of Totse.