problem solved

wow that sucks. I was going to offer advice, but this is way beyond my maturity level right now.

You sound like you've got a good head on your shoulders and the solution you've worked out seems like the right way of going about it.

Sometimes you've got to take a step back and let a person deal with their own issues. She needs to work through her clingyness and pathological lying on her own, as well as taking her education seriously. You can't be responsible for those things, only she can.

That being said, if you love each other thing can work out if you both make th effort. She sounds like she's got a bit of growing up to do yet, and if you don't mind sticking by her while she does it, you might get something out of it yet.

How could you not note these things before asking her to marry you?

Have you tried sitting her down and expressing these sentiments to her?

Buyer's remorse. A lot of engaged couples tend to go batshit. It happened to my step brother and his wife. Don't worry, everything will be all right :].

But what I'm concerned is this: You engaged a 19 year old? What?

Dude only you can make this decision, but I will say don't feel like you can't dump her just because she has nowhere else to go. She won't die, she will get through it.

Too long/ Didn't read

How old are you?

I don't think it's going to work out... She seems waaaay too immature.

DEFINITELY, definitely, get rid of her.

Seriously... unless you want to just be miserable, get the fuck rid of her.

let her grow up and go finds somebody that isnt gonna drag you down.. unless youre like 40, then dude.. dude.

dude.

p.s. c'mon man you're probably not so old at all.. maybe you got some growing up to do too.. i mean you are in this position. do you really want to be with somebody who aint got their shit together? maybe somebody who never will? figure it out champ.. also shes not very sexual.. whats the saving grace here?

thats right listen to doctor phil. not really, but youre presenting a raw deal.. only you know how it really is. i'm not on drugs.. really.

She sounds immature and like maybe she's having second thoughts too and just not dealing with them like you are. This is why long engagements are a bad idea...It gives you time to freak out about everything.

This is why long engagements are a fantastic idea...It gives you time to find out about everything.

Fixed

I've been in a relationship for 18 months now, I'm engaged, and I love her lots. However, things she wants are starting to piss me off and she won't even try to listen or compromise. Lately, i've turned to tough love to send the message. She's very clingy, and doesn't want to do anything without me, and gets upset whenever I want to do anything by myself. Our sex life is taking a dive as she has almost no enthusiasm anymore, and i'm hyper sexual, so that's a big problem. I feel like she's trying to control me, and I'm not whipable. I can tolerate a lot, but when someone tells me I can't do something like play my video games for a reasonable 30 minutes...


That's as far as I read LEAVE NOW. LEAVE. NOW.FLEEE. RUN. GO.



She's trying to stop you from doing something that you enjoy? That really doesent sound selfish at all.

*scrapes away sarcasm*


It could be anything you enjoy. Unless she's good reasons to try to get you to stop it, unless there's a valid point to forcing you to stop, she's just being selfish.



How long before she gets knocked up and demands even more of your time?

I agree with yoyo, leave. She's not going to change. Don't be like my brother who married a (as polite as possible) controlling girl. Things got really bad, and they talked about divorce.

As for leaving her destitute, that is her problem. It seems to me that she wants a mrs. degree. Her grand aspiration in life is to get married, pop out children and have someone take care of her ($$) her entire life. If you want that go ahead, but prepare for trouble down the line.

The obvious answer is talk to her. Get the best information, then make your decision.

That's as far as I read LEAVE NOW. LEAVE. NOW.FLEEE. RUN. GO.


Agreed. It sounds like she pulled a bait n' switch on you. She pretends to be the perfect girl, very sexual, very chill and not on your case 24/7. This is the bait.

Then

As soon as she gets engaged or married, she switches her personality around and doesn't want to do anything with you. You said you are not the whipped type, then take my advice and leave her.

Fixed

This.

Fixed

Definitely This.

What the hell?
How old are you?
25?

Just hand her back over to her parents. But becareful., they could charge you for rape.
(No, seriously).

Especially if you were dating BEFORE she turned 19.

you must be really stupid if you fell in love/ got engaged to a crazy bitch

You've mentioned that you're concerned over her mental state. This will not change, no matter how long you're with her for.
And the fact that you express these doubts so willingly and easily to people shows exactly what you're beginning to think about her.
Once you start feeling sour about someone like that in a relationship, it will not improve.
She will not, all of a sudden "Become Sane". Not now, not ever. No one does.
I think you've made a 'little bit' of a mistake here.

And her schooling is not your business. You claim if she fucks up, that it will affect you. How?
At this age, you have no say over her actions. All you should be doing, is just choosing whether or not to stay with her, based on whether you view her actions in life as moving towards, or away from your preconceived notions of an ideal partner.

As for the sex problem, We can't help you, you have to talk to her about that. And if she's over it, then don't feel guilty about feeling angry about your relationship.
Don't settle for her inane problems, when they infringe upon your needs in a healthy relationship.

I don't know what in hell made you get ENGAGED to her, since the fact that you are on TOTSE asking these questions, shows ( among other things ) that you are totally, completely unready for marriage.

ur age damnit