Well now, where to begin...

A good female friend of mine, as of many years ago, is starting to tickle my fancy!

Now, this isn't just some When Harry Met Sally situation...

Her ex-boyfriend, whom I am VERY fond of, happened to have passed away... :( (God bless his soul, I will love him forever).

But recently, we have been finding some very similar interests. Or, more like, complementary interests. I have a fetish for being used, abused, and told what to do... And she happens to have a fetish for the exact opposite...

As luck would have it, we're both quite close, and can easily convey these desires to each other... But I can't look past her past boyfriend who happened to have passed on. I feel as though I owe it to him to protect her from any potential suitors... Including myself... I suppose?

But the match is immaculate...

She wants to boss someone around. To do all kinda of aggressive acts.

I would LOVE for a girl to tell me what to do. To assert her dominance over me! To hit me! To spit on me! To cuss at me! God, anything like that...

Maybe we have the potential for a wonderful match...

But is it ethical? I need your help to decide on this, as I LOVE her past boyfriend who happens to have passed on. I don't know if this would all be morally justified. It's not like I'd abuse her or use her in any way. I'd treat her with nothing but respect!

Hey, if anything, I'm probably better a suitor than any other male out there!

What should I do?

It seems like you only have 2 things in common:
1) a sexual fetish
2) the loss of her boyfriend/your friend.

How long ago did her boyfriend die? Was he her boyfriend when he died, or were they already broken up?

If she seems ready to move on and find someone new, I say go for it. Just be really careful and be prepared for it to fail. :(

I feel as though I owe it to him to protect her from any potential suitors... Including myself... I suppose?

It's a pretty good bet that, in time, she's going to want to get out there again and be with people.

That said, an intense relationship with a friend of her late boyfriend may not be the best thing to start out with.

Really, though, it's up to her, and I think people often get into huge messes when they concern themselves with "protecting" people. Usually because their motivations may not be what they think they are.

you're fucked in the head. id be worried about her ex bf watching me. ghosts and all that.........

I would have thought that, if the bloke could watch what was happening, he would want you more than anyone with her. Someone he knows will look after her, and all that.

Afterlife aside, move in slowly. If she is ready for a relationship, try it out.

It seems like you only have 2 things in common:
1) a sexual fetish
2) the loss of her boyfriend/your friend.


Well, those are the only two things he mentioned.

Dude, I don't think you would be doing anything to hurt him or his memory by dating/fucking her. If anything, you're making sure it's not some creep who's fucking her.

Heh, i think i've been in a weirder one.

But your title choice aside, i'd advise you to go for it. Be gentle with her though and if she wants you to back off do it immediately. She's gonna be a bit raw and if you blow it now you may never get another chance.

It seems like you only have 2 things in common:
1) a sexual fetish
2) the loss of her boyfriend/your friend.


This.

Is that really the only thing(s) you two have in common?

Her ex wouldn't want her to not have sex again. And instead of some other creep he doesn't know doing it, you could. Think if you were the ghost of her BF, you have to accept the fact that she'll be having sex again. He's passed away, nothing you can do about it, and she will love again, better love you then a stranger.

you lied. this isnt bizarre in the least, not one mention of a tranny or dog.

As has been said, you really ought to go ahead with this. Better you than some asshole.

I've been in worse. But.

Do you think you'll be able to get her ex out of the bed? Or are you always going to be thinking about him whenever you are together. That sorta thing has killed relationships.

That said, throw caution to the wind and go for it.

Every time I see you falling
I get down on my knees and pray
I'm waiting for that final moment
You'll say the words that I can't say.

Well, I think that the major contributing factor to this thread being created was a lingering sense of loneliness, combined with a conversation with the girl in question, and throw in a dash of alcohol and assorted downers, and you've got what may be an irrational ideal.

Despite the fact that I am an avid atheist, and have no beliefs whatsoever in the supernatural, including Karma and souls and whatnot, I still feel some kind of moral obligation to abstain from pursuing any kind of non-platonic relationship with her.

Besides, we make really great friends anyway. Why ruin that?

I'm sure I can find another girl who's willing to spit on me and tell me I'm worthless (without actually meaning it, of course!). :p