<venting>
OK here goes. I had a girlfriend of nearly 4 years, she broke up with me about a year ago, I've pretty much dealt with that and moved on.

But, I remember when she broke up with me I was hurt so bad- beyond words. The good thing was, with all the hurting it gave me mass amounts of energy to change my life around. Within a year I changed from someone who didn't have any friends (except my girlfriend at the time), was lacking so much confidence that I even found it hard to buy stuff from the local supermarket, because there were so many people looking at me. I always was afraid to talk to strangers and even people I knew quite well, because I thought my opinion didn't matter- I was ugly in all ways from my soul, to my appearance.

But now, im really confident, have a best friend, quite a few close friends and masses of casual friends. reasonable job, awesome new car and the main thing is im pretty much always happy- and people see that in me now.

Now the thing is, I've realized that being single gave me time to find myself, chase my ambitions and develop myself personally.

I'm with my 3rd girlfriend after breaking up with my ex, the stages are exactly the same...

Meet girl and hit it off.
I get with girl.
Think she is great.
Start getting serious.
Then I realize that most of my energy is going into the relationship and can't find the time or energy to chase my personal ambitions. Then I end up becoming depressed so I break up with them. All this happens in around 2 months.

But now, I'm with a girl who I utterly adore and I want her to have my babies. She is amazing, and I've never felt quite like this about anyone before. First we had heaps of fun, but now that we are starting to get serious, the usual stage of events are happening again. But I don't want to break up with this one.

I feel as if I have the choice of love and depression, or the absence of love but happiness. grr its so annoying, maybe I'm not looking at it right.

</venting>

Slow down. 2 months is way too fast to start a serious relationship.

This.

You need to take it easy, just enjoy things at a leisurely pace. Let it grow into a relationship rather than force it.

You dont need to not date, you need to make sure you dont put all your effort into a relationship. The more effort you put into a relationship the more you hemorage time and energy, and it's often not appreciated or reciprocated.
I'm glad you've found out what the problem was with your relationships, hopefully you'll be able to find a good balance now, yes?

I've been there, put everything I had in a relationship and found that when it ended it had eaten me alive, no emotions left no friends no energy no life. I figure if you're a 'giver' you need to make sure to not give yourself too much.

Take it one day at a time and stop worrying/looking at the bigger picture if you can.

If your relationship starts to take over your life and you feel yourself falling back into a life you don't like, take some time to focus on your social life and personal ambitions, and spend a little less time with the girlfriend. You don't have to cut off your girl totally in order to maintain your independence, and finding that balance is really important, as I'm sure you know.

That's why

fuck buddies > gfs

torqueman & ZeroMalarki- yeah I wasn't quite sure if 2 months was too quick or not, It's strange because one girl told me she loved me after about 3 weeks of being with her, and I've felt love for another chick after about a month- the one im with now. So I figured it was getting serious...

yoyobek & Silverfuck- Thank you so much, this is the kind of advice I was looking for. I just need to chill out, take it slow and keep the relationship going with minimal effort and just let things take their own course.

extremeZ- That wouldn't work with me, as soon as I shagged them, I would grow too attached...

I would advise you keep this going one-day at a time. Don't project the future too much, live for today. The only reason people break up is incompatibility, if your compatible today, that is all that matters because today is all we have. :P