Me and my ex have been hanging out again after 3 months of not talking to eachother. He apologized for everything and has been walking on egg shells ever since. We have gone out to eat twice, and hung out twice, the last time fooling around. It was really emotional, not just something to do... although there is a problem. He gets really embarassed and won't let me do anything for him because he cums in like less then a minute. Last night though he let me, but then he got really embarrassed and it was the most painful experience because I didn't know what to say. He said this is why I don't let you do anything, because it's not fair to you and it puts a damper on everything.

I don't know what to do to fix this. I feel horrible when he doesn't get anything out of it, but then it just makes me feel awkward afterwards. I mean, should I take it as a compliment, or something that should be fixed? I'm just really confused about the situation. Any ideas?

Let him get off, then pleasure you, then go at it again. The second time around, he'll most likely last a lot longer.

Tell him that it makes you feel more confident because you can get him off that quickly, and that it's an ego boost to you. That way he won't feel bad about it.

Benzocaine.

Benzocaine.

what the fuck is that?

what the fuck is that?

A mild local anesthetic commonly used by men to last longer.

Benzocaine spray or gel applied to the genitals produces a numbing sensation that enables him to not blow so soon.

It's commonly used in those "endurance" condoms.

It's practice and being comfortable with each other. It is possible to improve your stamina if the girl is willing, and almost always the girls are willing to sit there and cater to the man.

Tell him that it makes you feel more confident because you can get him off that quickly, and that it's an ego boost to you. That way he won't feel bad about it.

Lie: The woman's solution to everything.

It's practice and being comfortable with each other. It is possible to improve your stamina if the girl is willing, and almost always the girls are willing to sit there and cater to the man.

Ah... more detail please. I need ideas not just "well... theres a possibility it could improve"

Lie: The woman's solution to everything.

If that happened, it would give me an ego boost.

Ah... more detail please. I need ideas not just "well... theres a possibility it could improve"

Tell him to slow down every once in a while when he gets close to cumming. And if he feels like he's gonna blow, tell him to clench his ass/base of the cock muscles like he's trying to stop pissing.

If he's not wearing a condom, wear one, that helps.

You can rub benzocaine on it like robinhoody said, it's gonna make his dick taste awful if you don't like the taste of local anaesthetics of the 'caine family. And if you can get him off in a minute with your mouth, can you come to Connecticut?

Are you blowing him or are you guys fucking? Usually premature ejaculation only happens during sex because of 'performance anxiety' or w/e. Does this happen when your giving him head and sex?

http://img26.picoodle.com/img/img26/5/12/21/xskittlehead/f_facepalmm_d2078f6.jpg

It doesn't happen to me. I'm saying that if it did, I would be flattered because it took so little for me to get him off.

http://img26.picoodle.com/img/img26/5/12/21/xskittlehead/f_facepalmm_d2078f6.jpg

It doesn't happen to me. I'm saying that if it did, I would be flattered because it took so little for me to get him off.

I didn't realize I quoted your post. Actually I think I was going to reply to it then decided to post to the original content of the thread. Most of us don't sit on totse and make sure all of our posts are perfect like you. Oh ps fuck you.

I didn't realize I quoted your post. Actually I think I was going to reply to it then decided to post to the original content of the thread. Most of us don't sit on totse and make sure all of our posts are perfect like you. Oh ps fuck you.

Haha, yea, get mad at me because you made a mistake. That makes perfect sense.

Having sex. He won't let me give him head because he knows I don't like doing it. Every single time he's like, "I don't want to do this. You know how it's going to end" and then it ends that way. I tell him not to think like that but he does anyways. He wears condoms, Trojan which are pretty thick. I think its a psychological problem but I don't know... I'm no therapist

If that happened, it would give me an ego boost.

Bull fucking shit. Your first thought would be "Shit, I made a mistake picking THIS loser".

Have him practice masturbating for a long time. Like getting really close to cumming over and over so that he knows when he's gonna start cumming, then have him practice cumming without releasing.

Omg Its In Its In!!!

Omg Its In Its In!!!

Your name reminds me of an instance I caused...

I need like serious advice if possible because it's painful, not physically but emotionally because I know it's something he can't help. At first I thought it was because he was being selfish and just didn't care about me, but it's actually something he's genuinely embarassed about and painfully shy about. Like it's partially an ego bust for him. After we broke up, he didn't pursue or date anyone for that 7-8 months. He had a few options (mostly when he went away to college), but he didn't bite at any of the hooks I think partially because he didn't want to go through the whole scenario again. I just don't want it to hurt him anymore, I don't want him to be embarassed or uncomfortable around me. How do I get him to be ok around me?

Let him get off, then pleasure you, then go at it again. The second time around, he'll most likely last a lot longer.

12345

QFT.

I thought this was standard practice for premature ejaculators.

Get him drunk. If he still doesn't comply, then feed him a few more drinks and tell him to stop being a little bitch.

Let him get off, then pleasure you, then go at it again. The second time around, he'll most likely last a lot longer.

Just do this. Why are you freaking out? It's not really a big deal. Just tell him it doesn't bother you and you guys will just work around it.

Just do this. Why are you freaking out? It's not really a big deal. Just tell him it doesn't bother you and you guys will just work around it.

It does bother me though because sex is my favorite part of the whole act, and for it to only last less then a minute its not pleasureable to me. We have tried getting him drunk, and it doesn't help alot either. It lasts a little longer, but nothing significant. Also, after like the first orgasm, its hard for him to get it hard again and keep it up. So I don't know what is making him this way. Nerves? But why would you be nervous with something you have been with for two years?

Some guys are like that... I don't think they should be persecuted because of it. Just fuck all night, eventually he'll take more than a couple minutes and you can get off. Seriously, it's Christmas Eve. Just give him good inter-intercourse foreplay, and he'll get hard again, or he should. Why does it bother you that much? How would you feel if you couldn't make him cum, and he just grew disappointed with you. There have to be some kinds of workarounds.

Also, after like the first orgasm, its hard for him to get it hard again and keep it up.

How long do you wait? If you try to go at it again 10 minutes later, yea, it's going to be hard (lol, pun) for him to get going again. Wait at least 30-45 minutes, if not more, before you try to have sex again.

I know that it sounds like I am coming off like a bitch, but this has lasted for two years. I want to know how I can help him, or how I can make it better. To whoever asked, no we wait a good 30 minutes with foreplay before trying again, but as soon as it comes time to have intercourse he becomes like jello. It just bothers me because he gets off like 3 or four times each time we get intimate, and I haven't had an orgasm ever by him because he can't last long enough. I thought that it would get better with time, maybe it was just something that he would grow out of, but it's been going on for two years. I also have a problem. I get really dry after a while of foreplay and it starts to hurt. We could easily fix this problem with lubricated condoms or just lubrication, but he never "comes prepared" as he puts it. I don't know if he purposely forgets to buy those things, or if he doesn't want to admit that there are problems in our sex life and it would make him look bad to have to buy them. Kinda like an ego thing. I don't know, it's just so frustrating, and I have no one to talk to about it because the more I talk to him about it the more discouraged he will get and it will make him last even shorter.

You're capable of purchasing condoms too, you know... Buy some of those extended pleasure condoms, but don't tell him that's what they are. Act like they're just regular condoms, and put them on him so he doesn't see the wrapper.

You're capable of purchasing condoms too, you know... Buy some of those extended pleasure condoms, but don't tell him that's what they are. Act like they're just regular condoms, and put them on him so he doesn't see the wrapper.

Honestly, those have never worked for me. They've either numbed my dick too mucha nd killed my erection or not stopped me for cumming 'cuz i was like hey i got this thing it'll let me last forever and just pumped away without thinking about it.

Honestly, those have never worked for me. They've either numbed my dick too mucha nd killed my erection or not stopped me for cumming 'cuz i was like hey i got this thing it'll let me last forever and just pumped away without thinking about it.

Regardless, she can still buy lubricated condoms.

Try getting him to wear a cock ring, I'm reliably informed it helps (ie my ex had the same problem with a former lover and she told me it worked for them).

How is he getting off multiple times each session, if he is unable to become hard again after orgasming once? This isn't making sense. Anyway, why isn't he getting you off during foreplay? He must suck at it if you are drying up before you come. You probably ought to be giving him more guidance. Also, why are you expecting him to by lube for you? Does he buy the rest of your shit? Go buy your own lube. You're asking the wrong things of the guy. Instead of making unfair demands of his dick, which he can't do anything about, you should be teaching him to get you off in other ways while you explore different avenues in solving the premature ejaculation issue, like extended pleasure condoms and the other potential solutions mentioned in this thread.

give the kid some k god dammit.

Cumming in less than a minute is really embarassing. It also kind of takes away the enjoyment of having sex or doing things because you know that you're going to get compared to every other guy out there and lose.

That's why I tend not to get to deep with a girl, I'll kiss her and stuff, try and get her off and stuff, but sex is usually embarassing.

Condoms are his responsibility, the pill is mine. I am protecting myself by being on birth control, and he should be buying condoms help solve the problem. He said that he would buy lube too for like months but he never has.

ZeroMalarki, that's exactly what he says about it. And if he can't buy a simple box of condoms and some lube, how am I ever going to get him to buy a cock ring? Also he gets off several times each session because he can't really handle anything- dry humping, touching, handjobs, etc.

Uhm why on Earth are you sleeping with him at all, then??!

Oh and he needs to go to the doctor.

seems to me that you should shit on his dick and lick it off like a good girl

he should be buying condoms help solve the problem.

Sounds like your getting pretty one sided about this, telling him to fix his own problem.

Why didn't you find another guy?

Buy a vibrator and tell him to go to town on you and let him cum in your face when he can't handle sticking it in you anymore.

Uhm why on Earth are you sleeping with him at all, then??!

Oh and he needs to go to the doctor.

What's a doctor gonna do? I'm assuming he's a kid so there's no way he's gonna get viagra from the family doctor, and there's not a lot a doc can prescribe to get him to last longer. Maybe benzos...

If his penis had sores on it, I'd say go to a doctor... but mostly likely the doctor will just tell him to find another way to get over it or some more medically-termed version of what we've told this poor chick.

And OP, if you're still hooking up with this guy after breaking up and he can't even get you off, you still have some deep rooted feelings for him that you need to address before they become unhealthy.

What's a doctor gonna do? I'm assuming he's a kid so there's no way he's gonna get viagra from the family doctor, and there's not a lot a doc can prescribe to get him to last longer. Maybe benzos...

If his penis had sores on it, I'd say go to a doctor... but mostly likely the doctor will just tell him to find another way to get over it or some more medically-termed version of what we've told this poor chick.

And OP, if you're still hooking up with this guy after breaking up and he can't even get you off, you still have some deep rooted feelings for him that you need to address before they become unhealthy.

I know, I still really care about him and it drives me crazy but I can't help it. He's 19, so it's not like he's a "kid" that's 13 or something. I thought that premature ejaculation was grown out of by this age, but obviously not. How am I supposed to help him? Yes I am probably coming off one sided, but there's nothing I can do for him. It's a pyschological, physical problem on him part. The only thing that can help him is if he is willing to help himself, which obviously he's not. He won't go buy anything to help the problem because it will hurt his ego and he will have to admit that there is a problem. I don't know what to do.

I know, I still really care about him and it drives me crazy but I can't help it. He's 19, so it's not like he's a "kid" that's 13 or something. I thought that premature ejaculation was grown out of by this age, but obviously not. How am I supposed to help him? Yes I am probably coming off one sided, but there's nothing I can do for him. It's a pyschological, physical problem on him part. The only thing that can help him is if he is willing to help himself, which obviously he's not. He won't go buy anything to help the problem because it will hurt his ego and he will have to admit that there is a problem. I don't know what to do.

Buy the shit yourself, dumbass.

Man, and how does he go about foreplay with you so that you dry up? If it starts to hurt, then he´s doing it wrong. Can you get yourself off? Show him to do the same. does he give you oral? Make him.

And like glitterpunk said, it really makes no sense when you say he goes flaccid for the second round, yet he cums multiple times each session.

Just because it's his 'job' to buy the condoms doesn't mean that you can't buy lube.

Ok, I don't think you are seeing hte pyschological problem on his part. He won't go buy the shit because it will mean he will have to admit that there is a problem. It hurts his ego to even think about how bad the situation is. If I go and buy the stuff and tell him to use it, he will probably hate me forever because I came flat out and said, "Here buddy, use this." That's like telling a guy, "You suck" or "You have a small penis" or something cruel.

To the question about orgasming more than once, I really can't explain that either. He is hard as a rock the first time, but the next couple times this happens. He gets hard again and then right when it touchs my area to penetrate it goes limp enough to where you can't do anything with it. Like he is semi hard, enough to give a handjob to to make it harder, but as soon as you stop rubbing and get in the position to have sex it goes limp (and that's within seconds of time).

Mayhaps he needs therapy...

Doesn't help you or your problem in the mean time, but nigga needs to get on a couch, nawmean?

He goes limp for sex, but comes again very quickly if you jack him off or dry hump? I'm still not understanding...

If you guys have discussed condoms and lube and he says he'll buy them, then he is in a way acknowledging that there is a problem, at least enough so that he can't get mad at you for buying the items yourself.

I think part of the reason this is causing such big problems for him psychologically is your attitude toward the matter. No offense, but your position essentially appears to be that he has a monumentally huge problem that no one in the world has ever experienced before and it's 100% his fault and thus his matter to deal with completely on his own. You want to help, but can't because you don't want to.

You're never going to get the problem solved with that outlook. Until you decide you actually want to help, instead of blaming him for your not getting off (which, by the way, is not his dick's fault. If you can't get off without a penis penetrating you, that's your problem), you're just going to make matters worse by continuing to make him feel bad about it and like it's his responsibility alone to fix.

You guys need to talk this out, discuss your options, and then try some. Decide that you'll buy the lube and condoms. It's one thing for a guy to admit to his girlfriend that he has a problem, but it's something else entirely to admit the same thing to a random clerk at a drugstore. If it's hard for him to make these purchases, do it yourself. Use his money, but do it yourself. Then when you guys get down to business, start by getting him off, tell/show him how to get you off (and make sure you do), then put on an extended pleasure condom and give it a whirl. If he goes limp, I don't know what to tell you because that completely contradicts what you were saying before about him coming more than once per session, so I don't know what to tell you there. But if the sex doesn't work out at that point, at least you've both climaxed already and can try again another day.

Glitterpunk, I have given him many suggestions on how to fix it - everytime someone has given me a new idea, I texted him the possible solution. When jacketch said the cock ring, I suggested it through text; when some said the extra endurance condoms, I suggested it through text; when someone gave me tips for him to practice, I suggested it through text. It's not like I haven't done anything to help solve the problem. I am giving him all of the options, and he doesn't make a move at all. I asked him if he wanted me to go to the store and buy the stuff since I am away on holiday and no one in the stores will know who I am and he said, "No _____, don't do that, it's not your place to do that." So don't sit here and tell me that I have a sour attitude about the whole thing because you would be a little on edge too if you were in this situation. It's, at times, frustrating.

Maybe he purposely forgets to buy the condoms because that way if he doesn't have them he won't have to go through the embarassement. The same thing with the lube.

How does asking him to buy lube equate to telling a guy "You suck" or "You have a small penis?"

You usually make serious posts here, but I'm starting to think that you're just trolling now... You've been given TONS of serious advice, but you won't take any of it, and your story keeps getting harder and harder to believe.

Is he active or does he sit the muchiness? It sounds like he may too weak in the hippial/crotchial areas from not enough of the muscular stressings in said areas.

In other words: he's let his poor, wee bum get soft & candy-assed from inactivity. Poor beggah. Pity, that. Bloke has coome a cropper, 'e 'as.

I have no fucking clue what you just said but I'm sure it was profound.

OP, you just confound and confuse me. I just don't get it. He is an EX for a reason, keep it that way. You lack compatibility/chemistry.....so go on with your life and close that door.

And don't think I don't understand booty calls with exes. I fucked plenty of my exes just for sex, sometimes even hating their guts while banging their brains out. But what you've described in this thread isn't even a SUCCESSFUL booty call......it's just sad. For the life of me I don't understand how any female could be attracted to such a "man" (term used very loosely). Him being that incapable in bed, and that only be surpassed by his profound insecurity is just lame. Hardly a man at all.

Listen I understand this morseo than you think, perhaps better than you do right now. You are in your new school, and trying to hook up with other guys. But because you are shy and uncertain you are hesitant and awkward. So on some level hooking back up with your ex is the "easy" thing to do.....you are familiar with him, there is very little risk. But geez girl, stop it already. Clearly you aren't happy, nor is this the kind of male attention you really want (whether physical or emotional).

If you could just manage a little more dose of courage and try better at hooking up with the NEW guys around you, things would be so much better. As hot as you are, as fun as you seem, and as intelligent as you normally portray yourself......you could have a line of guys at your door wanting your attention and fucking you WELL. Quit going the "easy" way with this ex and realize he is your past. Your future has so many more pleasures and fun experiences in it. All you have to do is go for it!!!!

You're right. These are all of my problems from six months ago, and I don't understand why I wanted to come back to them. Probably because it's winter break at my school and I have nothing to worry about, and I am not at school, so it makes it a whole lot easier to go back to what I knew. It drives me insane so much, and as much as I hate it I have grown to like feeling insane at the same time. It's what I am used to. I am also a person that wants to fix the world, and that drive gets me in trouble sometimes. I want to fix everyone and everything, and I need to realize that I can't do that. I need to let some things just be.

And just how is li'l sweet fixer-upper girlykins on fixing...herself? I take it you worked on yourself ever so hard until you were all turned from a naive little girl in a powerful & mature woman?

Excellent. Carry on ma'am.