Basically, I really want to get to know this girl better, but she's so inaccessible. Yesterday, I had a plan for this awesome conversation that would have basically put in in the exact place I wanted to be (which was putting the possibility that I like her in her mind.) Of course, I didn't get to put my plan into action because she was talking to her friends for THE WHOLE FUCKING DAY. How should I approach this situation in the future?

"can i talk to you after class?"

EDIT: or stage a school shooting and meet up with her when everyone is running for their lives.

Depends don't be rude about it, but you gotta bust in and grab her attention. Try to get her alone, meet her somewhere, just make it casual. Make sure she dont bring her friends either of course if you do meet up with her. If your in good enough with her, meaning you actually know her and could easily talk to her whenever you see her, get her cell/phone number. That way you got direct access.

Have you talked to her before? Have you ever talked to a girl before?

I've talked to her before, but I don't know her well at all.

tazer+ropinol+duct tape ?

Then when she's bound and gagged start heating a knife in the flame of your lighter, you'll have her undivided attention...trust me.

If anyone else said that Jack, I'd just laugh and wouldn't think about it any longer...

And to think, the guy knows you're stunningly attractive,and knows where you live.

And to think, the guy knows you're stunningly attractive,and knows where you live.

And this is different to you, how??!

(j/k, I really don't know where you live)

And to think, the guy knows you're stunningly attractive,and knows where you live.

Jack loves me in a 'man to man' kinda way...I hope...

start heating a knife in the flame of your lighter

NO NO NO!!!

A lighter will not get it hot enough. You need a torch lighter, or start a little fire (burn a book or something) and hold up the knife over that.

NO NO NO!!!

A lighter will not get it hot enough. You need a torch lighter, or start a little fire (burn a book or something) and hold up the knife over that.

These work pretty well, too. (http://www.amazon.co.uk/Kitchen-Craft-Masterclass-Creme-Brulee/dp/B00018GGR2)

*dribbles*

These work pretty well, too. (http://www.amazon.co.uk/Kitchen-Craft-Masterclass-Creme-Brulee/dp/B00018GGR2)

*dribbles*

No no no!

Yoyo, you need to think outside the box! (http://www.biggerhammer.net/mgshoot/kcrfall2k/flamethrower_upward.jpg)

...or is that too much?

NO NO NO!!!

A lighter will not get it hot enough. You need a torch lighter, or start a little fire (burn a book or something) and hold up the knife over that.

The point was to get her undivided attention...a captive audience so to speak.

Oh and from experience I can tell you a zippo will get a tip to red hot. Takes a while of course but thats all part of the magic...the way you intently rotate the knife lovingly in the hotest part of the flame, telling her how the colours are rainbowing and 'blue'ing.

You kids are all a like, a quick fix,a wham-bam-AAARGGGH-thank you ma'am. Gotta have style, class...take a pride in your workmanship y'know?

Also Young Padawan, it is important to let her know something about the knife you've chosen to use. Again, I assure you, she will be fascinated.

Of course you haven't just brought some cheap shit Walmarkt crap with you. Tell her why its soooo special, the fact its Damascus steel and was hand folded or that its toledo and made from the same steel as some of the finest swords in the World.

Its important she knows how much thought, car and attention you are lavishing on her. In a humble, understated way of course. Makes a good impression.

Oh and don't do it if she's sitting in her 'Appreciation Chair' over bare floorboards. They are a pain to clean and you'll end up having to sand them.

You would not believe how far girl pee will soak into bare wood.

Jack, stiletto daggers are far more...Interesting, to talk about.

And as another sign of devotion to the woman at hand, use nylon rope, it proves to be softer and more comforting to the skin.

I prefer to have them hang though, with their arms in the air, and their toes just able to reach the floor as a form of support.

I'm confused, am I trying to rape her or give her Stockholm syndrome and then have consensual sex?

I'm confused, am I trying to rape her or give her Stockholm syndrome and then have consensual sex?

Why not all three and a sammich after?

But in the first instance you were just looking for a meaningful dialogue.

Stilettos are indeed a fine talking point, especially the genuine ones with the triangular baldes...ahhh a whiff of the renaissance, the Medicis...a man for all seasons but hanging them in the air is just tacky tacky tacky and smacks of Coffee Table Bdsm.

You'll be wanting to put clothes pegs on her nipples next and then the next thing you know you'll be on Richard And Judy.

Clothes pegs? I'm upset that's what you think of me.

I'd rather go with piercing needles...Just because it's a sharp pain rather than the pressure type pain...And you can use more than one on the same nipple.

Here is an idea, talk to her and her friends? Lol...retards.



P.S: Drop the attitude.

Carbon, normally I'd agree with you, but what I had planned for yesterday just wouldn't have worked with all of her friends around. It would have been awkward, to say the least.

Also, I don't see how you can call someone a retard and then tell them to lose their attitude.

wont reheating the blade ruin it and make it equivilent to a walmart peice of crap?

wont reheating the blade ruin it and make it equivilent to a walmart peice of crap?

If anything, heating a good blade can only make a knife better.
My precious work knife has worked many a long shifts over a hot and evil grill and it's...vicious.

The next time somebody posts, I want them to ask themselves, "Is what I'm posting relevant?". If the answer is no, ask, "Is what I'm posting funny, or is it just weird and gay?". If you determine it to be the latter, what is the point in posting in this thread at all?

As a reference, everything on the second page counts as "weird and gay". Seriously, I can't figure out who you think is laughing at that shit. Ketch, you're like 40, and I'm sure you have something better to do than this.

Penis!

We're still on the first page, noob.

You should've asked yourself the same questions.

And yes, it's still page 1.

Anyway...Yoyo, how sharp is that knife?

Don't push your luck you BJP Cock gobbler!

I'd love to close this thread simply cos of your nick but unfortunately the rules don't allow it . Like Carbon B said, lose the attitude and the arrogance...oh my god she spent the day talking to her friends and not to you, you shit colored sex god? (which btw was the original point of the 'knife' posts y'know?)

Yeah that right people, jack doesn't like hindus and especially not the sort who post on totse.

Oh dear....yet again I've probably managed to upset some ethnic minority.My bad.

*imagines the email Zok will get*

"Dearest Sir, please be banning Mr.Jackketch from your most excellent website. He is being most ignorant of my ancient culture and religion. He surely not worthy to be moderate of such an august board as totse"

Fucking Hindus, the single most arrogant and ignorant race on the planet, hell I rather have teenage trailer park ginger Klansmens post here.

This is page three for me.

and I'm not hindu (or indian for that matter), so that entire post was lost on me.

Oh and don't bother gripping to the other mods here. They're all Brits (excepting Mojo of course) so they'll like you even less.

I have like 10 posts here, I don't care about this forum enough to "gripe".

"gripe".

Please go fucking die, you illiterate son of Vishnu...

I'm not exactly sure how that makes me illiterate. I was trying to illuminate Ketch's misspelling of "griping", but whatever. You're a cock for jumping to conclusions, anyway.

You're a cock for not being able to talk to a fucking girl properly... what are you some sort of 22 year old virgin?

I didn't come here to get into a fight, I just wanted help. Instead, I've been attacked and had my thread hijacked by a pretentious, unfunny moderator. On top of that, you people felt it necessary to attack my supposed religion. Way to go guys, you're prejudiced. Super. In conclusion, I'm done with this whole damn forum. I'd rather solve my own problems than come here again and have a horde of faggots jump down my throat.

*waves goodbye*

Now back to our discussion...Clothes pegs are out...What's in?

Piercing needle's Rabb!!!

Piercing needle's Rabb!!!

While effective at getting the required...Response...From a woman, they're not as erotic from my point of view.

uhhh... Breast pump?

uhhh... Breast pump?

I guess...Hmmm, Jack, surely you have some input?