So my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me in a very painfull way, for me anyway. We had been taking a break for a few weeks, and then out of the blue she tells me she wants to be with me again, and misses me, "oh so much."

Me, being the idiot in love says ok "yeah I want to give this another try."

Anyway, 3 days later she is supposed to meet me on a date, she is an hour late. I say ok, and call her, she is, "With a friend at the mall, and will meet with me later." I am a jackass and say fine. Hour comes later and still no girlfriend. Call her and ask whats up?

"I'm at a bolwing alley with some friends." I get pissed and tell her if she wanted to break up with me than to just do it.

I know I sould've broken it off but I was and still am in love with this girl. And this is where my question comes into effect here.

This was all over a year ago, and I actually have a new girlfriend now whom I adore, and I waited a long time before actually dating her because I was afraid I wasn't ready but she is so good to me that I wouldn't trade her for anything.

However; there is this ex who still lingers in my mind and I can't get rid of. Every dream about her is bad and we hate each other in them, but it still takes a toll on me whenever I think about her. Its like a cheese grater dragging against my soul. It just makes me feel weird and I'm afraid I take it out on my new girlfriend.

Anyway, how do you think you would find closure on this? Because I normally have no problem with closure but this is awful.

I dunno, during the worst fight my girlfriend and i had, we ended up not talking for three months, and i sure as hell never thought i'd hear from her again. I even went so far as trying to move on/forget about what happened, or at least put it behind me. but then we started talking, got back together, and both of us got our shit straightened out.

What i'm trying to say is that i think sometimes there are people who you just "work" with, even if at the time they don't want a committed relationship. Later, who knows what'll happen. but that feeling of loss, i doubt that it ever would have gone away had my girlfriend and i not gotten back together.

As horrible as it is, there are things that happen that we end up regretting for the rest of our lives, unless some strange turn of fate allows us to go back and fix it.

Either that, or you simply haven't had enough time/alcohol to get over it, sometimes it takes longer that others.

General closure rule in this situation....

She fucked you over...You hate her...You get over it...You finally nothing her (neither love nor hate her) and you move along and concentrate on your current girlfriend.

Took me a month but I did it.