so I met this girl at my homecoming dance a few weeks ago, (she goes to a different school)... after talkin online for a while we made plans to hang out, watch a movie on friday... went over in the early evening, things were goin good but after about 45 mins had to take a shit badly.i thought no big deal. excused myself to the bathroom.. when i was takin a dump though the shit didn't break off cleanly so i had to use more toilet paper than usual. i didn't think it was too much at the time but when i flushed the thing fucking clogged.

look around and no plunger in bathroom. i knew i was spending too much time in there so i panicked, threw a bunch of toilet paper on top and shut the door behind me. i go back to her room and sit down next to her and try to focus on movie. then my heart sank to my fuckin stomach when i hear heavy footsteps walking down the hall and open up the bathroom door. a few seconds later her dad pushes her door open and says "Erin.. can I talk to you for a minute??" she was gone for only a minute or two but when she came back she sat farther across the room and was more distant.

so of course i want to cry right about now. to make it ever worse a few seconds later i notice her dad walkin back toward bathroom holdin somethin in his hand. then i could hear loud plunging noises from down the hall.. I knew she could hear it too but neither of us said anything about it, it was really awkward and we hardly even talked the rest of the night until her dad came in and said, "Alright Erin it's time for your friend to go now"-- not even speaking to me directly. now she hasn't been online in a few days and I don't even know what the fuck is going on with her..i obviously fucked up at her house but i think if i just explain to her what happened she would be cool...did I blow it?? . help me totse..

that's fucking nothing u fuckin puss... earlier this semester i was so shitfaced i dropped a fuckin chocolate dog and pissed all over my girls futon when passin out..


my advice is to jus let her know you drop a meaty deuce because you are a guy..she will understand.

Shit in her mouth next time.

Hahahahahaha. Considering she is of an age where her parents tell you when the date is over, yeah you blew it. She doesn't go to your school, just tell your mates and have a good laugh about it. You'll get over it.

okay imma guess youre in high school probably a freshmen or sophomore.

anyways, i got to say, that was pretty fucking funny.

thats pretty fucking awkward. if i were you i would of reached in there and took out the obstruction. anyways lie to her... tell her while you were taking a dump, your cell phone dropped in there along with your shit, and you tried to take it out by using toilet paper to grab it. say it like you're really embarrassed, then say "that was the most embarrassing moment i ever had". tell her you got your cell phone out, after there was a bunch of toilet paper already in the toilet and that you threw your cell away and now you have to use your old one.

dam kids these days have no fucking imaginations. its easy to lie, just gottah think of a way.

That was some funny shit.

i swear...ive seen something similar to that on a movie

i cant rememeber which one but i just get this sense of deja vu

Yeah, about time to look for another girl. And shit before you go over to the next one's house.

The movie you're thinking of is dumb and dumber... back on topic... holy shit (or not so holy) you could have just you know.. been a man and politely told the father that the toilet clogged, and asked if you could use his plunger. I mean, are you retarded? It isn't embarrassing if you take out the obstruction your self instead of leaving it for her fucking father to find... God damn kids theses days are morons.

This made me laugh, especially the 2nd paragraph.

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Ha, Dumb & Dumber is the only reason I even read this thread... ( :

As for the OP, don't sweat it. If you want to save the situation though, you may have to nonchalantly bring it up though. You made it a lot worse by panicking when it happened, if you'd just walked down the hall and mentioned to one of her parents that you thought the toilet was clogged, and asked if they had a plunger, there would've been no troubles.
It wasn't a big deal, everyone shits and everyone clogs a toilet from time to time. But yeah... you may have to bring up the subject to defuse it a bit with her family thinking you're weird now.

Then again, if you can't be nonchalant about it, maybe you should just keep running away because you'd probably just make it worse.

That must have been a hefty shit if her parents kicked you out, I mean, DAMN.

That is AWESOME!
+10 to OP

God damn kids theses days are morons.

QFMFT!

Listen you blew it completely.....and not just in a "boyfriend" sense. As a human goddamn being you are unfit to walk the earth. Seriously, WTF? Is the whole world your Mommy picking up after you like some 2 year old? Did you think the Turd Fairy was going to drop down from the heavens and make it magically disappear?

This is one of those stories where if it got out around the school and within weeks were the laughingstock....it would be totally justified. MY FUCKIN 5 YEAR OLD has enough common sense and decency to come for help if there are "flushing issues".

Seriously dude, you may think this is cute, funny, lulz-worthy or whatever. Its not. It is absolutely indicative of your maturity and intellectual level. And right now you are at the bottom of the food chain. Christ I wouldn't want you in MY house for a playdate with my 5 year old......I'd trust a parade of pre-schoolers to hang out over here before your sorry self could even set foot in my yard.

Yes....you are a PROFOUND FAILURE!

this thread has made me lol

QFMFT!

Listen you blew it completely.....and not just in a "boyfriend" sense. As a human goddamn being you are unfit to walk the earth. Seriously, WTF? Is the whole world your Mommy picking up after you like some 2 year old? Did you think the Turd Fairy was going to drop down from the heavens and make it magically disappear?

This is one of those stories where if it got out around the school and within weeks were the laughingstock....it would be totally justified. MY FUCKIN 5 YEAR OLD has enough common sense and decency to come for help if there are "flushing issues".

Seriously dude, you may think this is cute, funny, lulz-worthy or whatever. Its not. It is absolutely indicative of your maturity and intellectual level. And right now you are at the bottom of the food chain. Christ I wouldn't want you in MY house for a playdate with my 5 year old......I'd trust a parade of pre-schoolers to hang out over here before your sorry self could even set foot in my yard.

Yes....you are a PROFOUND FAILURE!


Calm the fuck down dude. You dont think it would be a tad embarassing for a HIGH SCHOOLER to not wanna be known as the "Huge SHitter" On a first date/meeting?

IN this situation all you CAN do is laugh about it other wise its deppressing. He knew the toilet wasnt going to flush itself....but hopefully no one would notice till after he left.


Im reporting you as a suspected pedo. You cirtaintly know alot about your kids time in the bathroom and poop issues

Probably should have just said you think it was clogged/acting weird right after it happened.

Still, it's not a great loss, her dad sounds like an asshat.

Next time try power flushing. Modern toilets are designed to save water so if you just push the lever normally it won't empty the entire tank to flush away your offending excrement. But if you hold the lever down, the entire tank will drain and remove a particularly steadfast loaf. Unless the toilet is a really old model this should work and if you hold it down until the entire tank has drained it should wash away just about any turd you can muster.

Hmm, stay away from her or just be cool and tell her what really happened and apologize.
Of is all else fails. just laugh it off.

Why the fuck didn't you just ask for a plunger? Everyone shits, you know?

NOT CUTE GIRLS THOUGH!!!!! EVERYONE KNOWS THAT MORON

c'mon r u serious?


http://i19.tinypic.com/7x2by9x.jpg

Calm the fuck down dude. You dont think it would be a tad embarassing for a HIGH SCHOOLER to not wanna be known as the "Huge SHitter" On a first date/meeting?

IN this situation all you CAN do is laugh about it other wise its deppressing. He knew the toilet wasnt going to flush itself....but hopefully no one would notice till after he left.


Im reporting you as a suspected pedo. You cirtaintly know alot about your kids time in the bathroom and poop issues

And I'm reporting you for being just as equally a mindless kidiot as the OP. Fuck "embarrasement".....that is part of life, and so is shitting/clogging toilets. The "sin" in this story isn't having mega-turds clogging toilets, instead running away like a fuckin child for SOMEONE ELSE TO CLEAN UP HIS MESS. See here is how ADULTS will quantify this scenario....

1) "Errrr sir, I just used your restroom and things aren't flushing all the way. Could I have a plunger or some other assistance?" The parents might get a chuckle at the super pooper that is in their house, but they'll respect the fact he MANNED THE FUCK UP and is fixing HIS mess. They are NOT going to forever walk around talking/thinking/gossiping about things are just human nature. Clogging a toilet has happened to just about everyone at some point in time....so the OP hasn't really done anything "wrong" per se.

2) The scenario takes place just like the OP describes. And then the parents walk away thinking all kinds of negative things. What kind of cretin does such a thing? What other sickening unhygenic things does this creep do? What kind of parents raised such a malcontent? How does a human being grow up to even be at a "dating" age, and not possess even a shred of common sense, decency, or civility? And again....fuck the whole "dating" aspect. Just the fact another human being walked in your door and tried to escape thinking some magic fairy was gonna make it all go away, or at the very least that SOMEONE ELSE should be cleaning up their shit after them......SPEAKS VOLUMES about their stupidity and maturity level. It doesn't matter if that is the dad's boss, his daughter's boyfriend, the neighbor across the street, or his 50 year old brother.......you would walk away NEVER respecting or trusting that person ever again. And if inquired probably tell anyone the EXACT REASON why you will never associate or allow that person in your home again.

So which scenario do you find MORE "embarrasing"? 5 minutes of an uncomfortable/awkward conversation and task? Or forever being rememberd by an entire family (and anyone else they tell this story to) as a person that has the decency level somewhere between a wild dog and a toddler still struggling with potty training.

Anyone reading this story thinking....."what's the big deal?", should either huff Raid and die, or GROW THE FUCK UP!

And I'm reporting you for being just as equally a mindless kidiot as the OP. Fuck "embarrassment".....that is part of life, and so is shitting/clogging toilets. The "sin" in this story isn't having mega-turds clogging toilets, instead running away like a fuckin child for SOMEONE ELSE TO CLEAN UP HIS MESS. See here is how ADULTS will quantify this scenario....

1) "Errrr sir, I just used your restroom and things aren't flushing all the way. Could I have a plunger or some other assistance?" The parents might get a chuckle at the super pooper that is in their house, but they'll respect the fact he MANNED THE FUCK UP and is fixing HIS mess. They are NOT going to forever walk around talking/thinking/gossiping about things are just human nature. Clogging a toilet has happened to just about everyone at some point in time....so the OP hasn't really done anything "wrong" per se.

2) The scenario takes place just like the OP describes. And then the parents walk away thinking all kinds of negative things. What kind of cretin does such a thing? What other sickening unhygienic things does this creep do? What kind of parents raised such a malcontent? How does a human being grow up to even be at a "dating" age, and not possess even a shred of common sense, decency, or civility? And again....fuck the whole "dating" aspect. Just the fact another human being walked in your door and tried to escape thinking some magic fairy was gonna make it all go away, or at the very least that SOMEONE ELSE should be cleaning up their shit after them......SPEAKS VOLUMES about their stupidity and maturity level. It doesn't matter if that is the dad's boss, his daughter's boyfriend, the neighbor across the street, or his 50 year old brother.......you would walk away NEVER respecting or trusting that person ever again. And if inquired probably tell anyone the EXACT REASON why you will never associate or allow that person in your home again.

So which scenario do you find MORE "embarrassing"? 5 minutes of an uncomfortable/awkward conversation and task? Or forever being remembered by an entire family (and anyone else they tell this story to) as a person that has the decency level somewhere between a wild dog and a toddler still struggling with potty training.

Anyone reading this story thinking....."what's the big deal?", should either huff Raid and die, or GROW THE FUCK UP!

Anyway, ignoring some common typos, where were we, oh yeah. I see your point and approve of it.
Op should have cleaned his own mess and shouldn't be a sissy when it comes to admitting to your own shits.

Case closed.

I would almost expect that to happen to me. Honestly I wouldn'tve shit in her house because it could stink, among other things. Only If I didn't know her well.

Otherwise, If I were you, I woulda just done it with my hands. You can always wash them off you know. But yea that is super embarassing I'm sorry.


BRIGHT SIDE: She doesn't go to your school!

Am i the first one to notice the name? Maybe this is his way of coming out the closet?

Gold.

This.

HAHAHAHAH, omfg lol.

Owned by Tacos

Harry doesn't clog the toilet, Mary informs him that the flusher is broken after he spews poop into it.

Am i the first one to notice the name? Maybe this is his way of coming out the closet?

Erin is female, Aaron is male.

This is the reason why I don't ever take shit in anyone house, even in a public bathroom.

werent you worried about dingle berries

Just married.

That's fucking hilarious! Especially since you got kicked out..

I have no advice I'm a shitty as you when it comes to stuff like this but it brings back a story about this kid who came to a friend of mine's.

He took a shit sooo big that it wouldn't fit down the toilet. My friend's dad came in with a spatula to bust it up until it fit down.. We laughed so much.

I loled so much reading this thread...haha...

Wow, the [lack of] IQ and maturity of Totse users never ceases to amaze me.

And DaGuru, for once I 100% agree with you.

Oh come on, it's pretty fucking hilarious that out of all the ways a teenage guy could fuck up, THIS is what happened.

He took a shit sooo big that it wouldn't fit down the toilet. My friend's dad came in with a spatula to bust it up until it fit down.. We laughed so much.

When I was about 7 my mother had to do the same thing... with a gardening trowel.

My friend took a dump in his girlfriend's house a week or two ago. Problem was, it was in a toilet that didn't actually work. He didn't know it at the time but he got a nasty surprise whenever he flushed the toilet and saw his shit rising and ending up on the floor.

They were able to laugh it off though.

Ah, reminds me of the days when I had to hold my shits while at a girl's house. Now that girl is my girlfriend and I fart and shit in her presense all the time.

When I was about 7 my mother had to do the same thing... with a gardening trowel.

hahaha, oh wow.. we always joked about saving the spatula and inviting him over for burgers. Make his special.