Ok, this may be a very fucked up topic.....but considering S & A has a lot of "boo hoo, I have no confidence" threads I thought something this off the wall might be an interesting twist.

So there I was talking to a couple of my wife's nephews, sharing some bong hits discussing how their older brother was going to be sent to jail in the next couple of days. And we started talking about the psychology of it, being arrested....blah, blah, blah. Now keep in mind, I actually have TOO MUCH confidence if anything....and don't have any issues in regard to self-esteem, or afraid of fights or anything like that.

But I've always been aware of the fact that in the couple of times I've been picked up by the police, how much I get into being cuffed and thrown around by cops. Not in any sexual sense, just the feeling of POWER! No I don't have any homo fantasies, nor am I really into bondage all that much.....I've tried it and I can take it or leave it. However for me, I just love the overwhelming feeling of power I get surrounded by guys with guns, being restrained in handcuffs, and whatever pain I may feel in my arms or wrists depending on the circumstances of being arrested. And its not relative to being in jail, because like anyone else I just want to get the fuck out as soon as possible. But going through the arrest process makes me feel stronger, more able, more powerful than in any other time in my life.....even moreso when I have a firearm in my hands.

I remember one time being taken into the ER for a psychological evalution after getting picked up by the fuzz when I was just 17. It took 4 of them to finally get me cuffed, and then 2 or 3 met up with hospital security until they hooked me up in the psyche ward for 72 hours. I think I had a very arrogant "strut" about me in that scenario, as I was being forcibly taken into a place where sick people were wanting to be helped. And here I come as if I'm public enemy # 1, in a somewhat Scarface shtick...."make way for the bad guy, there's a bad guy coming through"....all the while innocent folks are witnessing this spectacle. Now mind you, this was like '87 and I already had that 80's metal stoner look, so having the public view me with some disdain was somewhat commonplace any how. So it's not like I was just feeding off negative attention because people were suddenly viewing me as a badass, because I kinda lived that life anyhow.

I'm also aware that during such instances most people have an adrenaline rush of sorts, so that could add to my "high" of the situation. Meh, who the hell knows? Just wanted to come to Totse and ask if anyone else has this weird psychological quirk when being arrested/cuffed by police. Or am I just completely whack?

Thoughts, comments, flames?

I only skimmed your post but you're fucked and were probably touched as a child.

The last time I was cuffed I got cuffed by the same cop 2 days in a row and jumped over the cuffs behind my back so they were in the front both times in front of the cop. He said "you must have a lotta practice at that" the second time and I just laughed.

But yeah, you really need some self esteem if getting arrested is a confidence builder for you.

I couldn't read it all, I got to the part about the poofy arrogent strut, and i full mental imagined her ex and its like, fuck you.

So you're thirty seven?

So you're thirty seven?

Uh huh.....flame away at why that surprises you.

I always assumed you were recently married, and still in your mid twenties.

Not overly surprised or anything, though.

Nah, I did it right dude. Partied my ass off, and completely whored around till late 20's, met wife at 28. No kids, no marriage before her. LUCKY ENOUGH to find a woman at 29 with no kids, no marriages. Only baggage she had was she was with an ex-alchy, but was separated from him almost 2 years. Which makes my daily toke habit seem like a walk in the park. : )

Married at 31, first kid at 32.........my age and my past makes me smarter/better/more patient husband and father, as well as incredibly loyal cuz I sowed my wild oats a plenty. No reason for me to stray, because I've done all that before and it doesn't get any better than this. Life is good.....ROCK ON!

Congratulations.

I would say I'd follow your advise, but I'm unmarried, 23 and expecting my first child... to the love of my life.

Back at ya bud, sounds like you are doing pretty damn well yourself. You and I will probably be talking a lot in the next several months. I remember those "new daddy" issues all too well. I was the most imbecilic oaf around babies before I had mine. Strap in for the ride of your life! Highest of the highs and lowest of the lows. Your "joy" and "stress" levels are about to be redefined.

Cheers!!!!!

I'm following your advice. Not the cops, but the party till you're about 30, then settle down. That's the way to do it, no regrets.

I don't really know about that one. I've been arrested/detained more times then I can count because cops tend to discriminate on the way you look, then once they all get to know you and your buddies all on a first name basis you tend to get arrested ALOT! It's just a major FUCKING INCONVENIENCE! Although if i'm going to get arrested it's alot better when i'm with a bunch of girls, because after I get out of jail I phone them up and their like "AWWW lets meetup" and you know the rest.

Getting "detained" for like..Public drunkenness or possession of weed or tresspassing or open liquor in parks and shit is just a joke to me though, all the people are like "HOLY SHIT OH MY GOD COPS ARE COMING HIDE EVERYTHING AND LIGHT A SMOKE" I don't really give a fuck I know the whole routine.

One time I was with all these girls and a couple of guys and we were being questioned/detained and they come up to me and the one cops like "Ohh haven't seen you in a while (My name)" then walks off to go do whatever they do and a lady cop comes up and she's like..."You ever been in trouble before?" and I just kind up look up at her and smile and say "Yup." Then I have to admit I kind of like this part, getting to brag when they ask you what your priors were and your probation conditions and how many times you've been arrested before. After that she takes out her note book and before she says anything I look up again and say

"My names (my name), born 11.27.19??, my address is ***-12*0 LaS***E Place, Coquitlam. V*b 7*7, my phone number is 604-944-****, No I don't live with my parents I have a room mate and here's my 2 peices of ID".

She just shined her flashlight in my eye's walked away radio'd in my info then let me go.

I watched my friend get cuffed for a robbery warrant on thurs and he was just pissed because he had to go to remand and is on house arrest now.

Fuck those bacon-dounut bitches!!!!!

There's something wrong with the people of totse...

Meh

"What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger"

A very cliché quote, but relevant.

I got somethin similar tattood on my shoulder

Fuckin aye!

Careless fuckers, always littering.

So how do you handle the pot/child situation?

Please elaborate, I'm not understanding the question. Are you implying I'm lesser of a parent because of my daily toking?

I have the feeling your baby is going to be a miscarriage or have some kind of birth defect.

Sorry to say, but Im usually right about these things.

Please elaborate, I'm not understanding the question. Are you implying I'm lesser of a parent because of my daily toking?

No I'm just wondering how you do it, that's all. Like does the kid know, are you going to tell him eventually, do you smoke in front of him, do you smoke with him.

It's an innocent question, I'm really not trying to put you down or say you're a bad father, it's just a rare situation and I want to know how that dynamic works.

No I'm just wondering how you do it, that's all. Like does the kid know, are you going to tell him eventually, do you smoke in front of him, do you smoke with him.

It's an innocent question, I'm really not trying to put you down or say you're a bad father, it's just a rare situation and I want to know how that dynamic works.

Gotcha, and I'll be happy to give you some answers. First a little background on my usage. I'm not really getting "baked" every day, usually just a few hits from my Dugout to take the edge off. You can search BLTC for more details of my usage, but I'm convinced my daily toking makes me a better husband and father. To summarize it makes me more patient, more understanding, and even more creative.

My son is only 4, so the answer is "no" he isn't aware of what/when I'm doing it. I don't even know if a 4 year old can fully grasp what any state of buzz or intoxication does to someone.....so I may have to wait a year or so to have that talk. Who knows, maybe he does realize it. "Gee Daddy is in a better mood/less stressed than before dinner, right after he had his smoke outside".

That's the thing, I smoke cigarettes as well and me going outside several times a day to have a smoke is quite common place. To be completely truthful with you, cigarettes is the ONE thing in this world I plan on harping on him about. I think I would sooner inject him with a hit of heroine myself, then ever witness him pick up even one cigarette. I myself have tried to quit smoking cigarettes, and its the worst vice ever. And its profoundly stupid. All nicotine does is give you relief from the craving of the nicotine itself. It doesn't have the medicinal and psychological advantages like marijuana. I realize this makes me a hypocrite, but I'll do WHATEVER I possibly can to never have him start smoking. Yet I'm well aware that my current smoking will probably push him in that direction once he gets older. I'm still working on it though.

Back to the weed, and I'm not totally certain how it will all play out. I doubt if I'll toke right in front of him, nor will I encourage him to try weed himself. But I'm a realist and understand fully that the majority of kids do try it, and I won't overdramatize the situation. And he will get ALL the facts about weed, not just what mainstream society feeds the masses. I can't see myself toking with him at 15, because at that age its still pretty much an experimental "lets get baked" type thing. But if at 25 as an adult and he is also a daily toker himself....then why the hell not? I've actually gone through this scenario with my wife's nephews as they were growing up. They started "dabbling" in the life, and because of the open door policy my wife and I have with them.....they've always been honest. I never told them about my current usage, but did try and direct them to responsible use by sharing stories about my past. Fast forward to today when they are in their late teens and 20's and now we do in fact toke together. Yeah the wife isn't that crazy about it, since she isn't a toker herself. But really, the alternating scenario is quite absurd. I'll walk out my door and take a couple hits before they get here, while they are smoking a blunt on the drive over. Then we'll all be hanging out watching a ball game, yet we are all happily stoned. Kinda silly if you think about having a "boundary" of ..."ok, we won't get high together, when we both are are doing the same thing separate".

So yeah, I won't push/encourage him to smoke weed.......but won't freak out if he does.

Any other questions/comments/flames are always encouraged.

I've never been arrested by police, but I have been dragged from a club by two bouncers, one of whom saw it as nescessary to push my head into the pavement with his foot once outside.
At the time it fucking sucked, but looking back on it, yeah, it kind of makes me feel powerfull that they were that scared of me. Or is that not what you mean?

I pretty much just skimmed over it...it sounds pretty gay to me, you should see someone about that before you start asking little boys to help look for your lost dog that doesn't exist

I find I generally end up with extra confidence whenever I buy a new knife (I am a bit of a pseudo collector.) I only ever carry my trusty 'ol CRKT folder with me; feeling dies down after a couple of days. Same deal whenever I pass a test in a martial arts class/course. Also happened when I got my restricted firearms license. No real reason for it, but it happens.

Are you going to get married?

It seems kind of weird that she'd be good enough to bear your child but not good enough to marry.
You're doing stuff the wrong way round!
One of the most awesome parts of the wedding is that usually someone else is paying, you get to stuff your face with cake and wear a pretty dress.
You'd be missing out not to do it..
/cake

Kinda, sorta in a round-a-bout way, yeah. For me its appreciating the absurdity of the moment while experiencing that moment. Usually the demeanor of the cops just heightens the "rush". Because more often than not, its inevitable at least one cop will play Billy Badass Toughguy games while you are detained. Whether talking shit, or just throwing you around roughly......I get such a kick out of how much of a pissant coward he truly is.

I mean think about it.....how hard is it to call someone a scumbag and slam them into a wall forcefully when the guy they are roughing up is cuffed and you have a gun, pepper spray, your buddies and a radio for backup? Yet with all of their advantages I'm STILL talking my shit and giving them trouble. Like the scenario I posted above being taken to the hospital. There was one young buck cop, looked like he could only be on the force a year or so. He tried talking the talk and hurting me a little by twisting my arms and tightening the cuffs while I was still yapping. Finally I look up at him while he is inducing some pain and say....."You having fun yet there tough guy, does this make you a man?" Of course that brought even more twisting and more pain my way, and inside I was laughing at how moronic this human has to be.......to be getting this kind of pleasure inflicting pain on a 17 year old, with his buddies by his side.

The ending of that story was somewhat lulz filled as well. Once in the hospital, the cops were wrapping things up and they left with only one remaining and the 2 security guards while I was waiting for my evaluation. As Mr. Tough Guy cop was about to walk out the door, I yelled out "Hey you" and he stopped to see what I wanted. I said to him simply....."Nice fight" and nodded my head in respect. The other cop remaining says....."Guru, you weren't in a fight". To which my reply was....."No, but HE was!". Tough guy walked out the door with a petty snicker, and I'm certain he heard my guffaws at his nonsense quite a ways down that hallway.

Does any of that make sense Yoyo?