No, this isn't one of those drunk, whiny ass and semi cryptic posts I've been peppering this forum with all too much of late.

Over the past six or so months, I've become a shell of who I used to be. I've been drinking myself to sleep most nights of the week. I've become belligerent with my friends, which rarely happens. I've gotten into full blown fights with my best friend, someone I've never fought with before. And I'm starting to lie. A lot. To people I really care about, too.
My ex girlfriend, who i'm still extremely fond of and have been talking to frequently since I've been in college, who I've been saying my "i love yous" to, texted me last night, saying she loved her bed. I mistook her number for a girl I'm fucking out here. I replied by asking if her roomate was there. I covered it up with some poor lie, and now I feel like an absolute shit.
I was talking to a different ex of mine today, and she really has illuminated how I have changed a lot, and mostly (and I agree) not for the better. I lie to people, I blow people off constantly, break promises... hell, if i got the chance I'd probably jack someone's shit if i wanted it badly enough.
But on the outside, I'm still friendly, I still act like the perpetual benevolent creature I once was. I'm still the person people can come to talk to. But none of that seems to matter anymore. I feel hollow. I feel like I don't care about others anymore. I barely care about myself... so why give a fuck about other people?
It seems like I've fallen so far...

Time and/or falling in love = solution.

I'm sick of falling in love to feel better. It's like hiding from my own emptiness.

Did this problem come to you suddenly?

Like, you just started being this way for no reason?

If it did, then I will post later to completely get you out of your situation.

Feel sorry. Seek to change. Work out the best ways of doing so.

Try and be a good person to others... if things fuck up... try harder.

Well, it's been a long slow descent into complete apathy, but up until now i haven't done anything that's made me feel absolutely terrible. I really really wish i hadn't fucked that chick in the first place... Ugh I don't know anymore.

I'm going down that road at high speed. I need a roadblock, quick.

I thought you said it wasn't going to be semi-cryptic.

In any event, as per my reply to your somewhat similar post, you've recognized the tail spin, which is good; most people can't do that. Now what you have to do is pull yourself out of it.

Easier said than done, I know, at one point in my life I saw it coming so blatantly I drunkenly wrote a message to myself that said "This is the part where you fuck up, good luck!" Or something to that effect, and I'll be damned if I didn't fuck up later that week to the point where I was semi-homeless.

You just have to motivate yourself to do something that you KNOW you love, and do your best to ignore everything that doesn't have anything to do with it while you're doing it.

Repeat.

Don't try to ignore, try to actively forget. It isn't about repression; it's about facing up to the truth, and mourning so you can move on.

dude i completely agree with you. long story short my ex gf tried to convince me that we should stay together to fix my instable personality and i thought exactly what youre saying.

look man, ive gotten to be the same way since i came to college. just give it time, and stop worrying about it so much, youll eventually return to your old self if you dont try to force it.

Sounds like me, except I'm pleased with what I've become.

Then again maybe I'm crying on the inside.

If you want to change, and you know the details of what's changed about yourself now, then there's no reason you can't change.

Just practice being mindful of what you're doing as you're doing it. Notice little simple things you do all throughout the day and it'll become sort of second-nature, useful for when you're doing other things later. If you observe yourself doing something that will only hurt others, and you don't want to live like that, then it's easy to avoid.

It also sounds like you're just fulfilling yourself as best you can without really knowing what it is that you want or need to do.
You need to think about what you'd like to be like in life, imagine the best you can picture your life being, and think about how you'd act, then do it.

It sounds simple, and it is.
As with everything else, the trick is to actually try in the first place, and to realize something, a sort of goal, that actually motivates you to want it and try for it.