Well recently I have been tossing up the idea of a 'change' or a 'break' to my regular day to day life. I feel as if I am stuck in a rut, and if I continue going the way I am, I may end up failing university, distancing myself from my family...etc. I do like my course and my family so don't get me wrong in that respect. It's hard for me to explain why I feel I need this break, I just know that I do (trust me on that).

A little about me - I go to university in Melbourne, Australia (RMIT) and study IT, this is my first year. I have a girlfriend of 3.5 years who I am totally in love with. I live at home with my parents and always have.

On the top of my life changing list was to travel. A working holiday (probably in Britain) feels almost exactly what I need/want. It will give me a break have my normal life and I will feel like I have achieved something. My plan was to go for the first semester of next year.

Now the only problem with this plan (and the biggest) is my girlfriend. In my head I had imagined her loving the idea to come with me when I made the proposition, however this is far from what happened. She is too comfortable in her life and I can't force her to come with me. Now this screws up my entire plans as I don't think there is any way I could go for 6 months without her (ohh soppy i know). Everyone has told me the whole "she will be here when you get back", though I don't doubt that. I feel that if I went alone, my whole trip would be ruined by the effect her absence will have on me.

Of course she is not selfish and is urging me to go, she does not want to hold me back. I am in quite a dilemma. I have considered other options as a break but none really stand out for me except travel.

So ladies and gentlemen of S&A, I now ask for your thoughts, suggestions and guidance. What should I do when I am unhappy as I am, but the only way to change it will likely result in me being unhappy as well?

I read most of that, so here is my answer. Now, this is completely honest and I'm not making a joke or anything. Get a bike. I started road biking and it takes my mind off of everything. Ride your bike to school. Ride your bike to random places to go exploring. Get your girlfriend a bike. Go bike riding together. Join a bike club, make bike friends. Go riding with bike friends. Next thing you know, your in great shape and your happy that you found a bunch of friends, and you and your girlfriend have a new hobby.

*Insert Chain saying "Organising" here*

On a serious note, the user above me is right. It doesn't have to be road biking though, you just need a hobby. Something you really love to do. That's a start at least.

For me its BMX, and although I've only been doing it for about a year and a half, I'm doing a lot better. I was a mess before, and I still am, but slowly I'm getting there.

Edit: Odd that both of our hobbies are bikes, eh?

Thankyou for the replies.

I don't feel that a hobby is really what I need. I have had many hobbies in the past (basketball, hockey, computers, computer games...etc). What I really want is an (almost) complete change of scenery (aside from my girlfriend).

Please can I have some more responses. Thankyou.

Don't go on a working holday in Britain. I live and work in Britain and it's a terrible place! It rains all the time, and all anybody ever wants to do is work and complain! We don't drink as much tea as you think though.

Sounds like a bit of a conundrum, seems like you need enough of a change to make you feel different but without taking you away from girlfriend. I think you should take out a student loan and find your own place.

That's a really good idea, Samthedrunk, he'd benefit from feelings such as independance, responsibility and change, like he would from holidaying in Britain, but it would only make his relationship with his girlfriend stronger as they would have more private time together.

Thanks, I thought so too. The best part is - he wouldn't even have to move that far away from his University, parents or girlfriend either because the whole new way of life will be enough of an adventure.

Come on over dude...Get yourself a place to crash and I'll help ya keep your mind off of her mate!

In return you can teach me these neat and wonderful things you've learned at uni!

She'll still be there when you get back mate...And there's always a way to get in touch with her.

Once again thank you all for your replies.

Moving out of home...this is another thing I have thought a lot about. There are many pro's and con's that come with it too.

My main issue is and always will be money. I'm not too sure about student loans, but as for getting a job, it would be hard to fund myself when I study 5 days a week, then there is homework and social time too. I will however, have a look into student loans, though the thought of that on top of my hecs fee's is fairly daunting.

Government money is a no-go'er too. My parents earn too much for me to be entitled to Youth Allowance, and I must be living out of home for 18 months before I am considered independent and can thus get Youth Allowance.

As for my choice of destination, I actually like the cold and the rain. It is rather ironic that I live in Australia when I hate the sun, heat and the beach. New Zealand was also of interest to me, though I feel Britain to be my primary choice as it is further away, and I have some friends there already. I definitely want to go to an english speaking country.

So the thought of any change next year for me looks quite bleak. I am still looking for any suggestions you good people may have.

Thank you all for your input.