You know what I mean. You want someone SO bad even though you know it wont work out?

Im not whining, Im just wondering what makes people tick when it comes to the signifigant other?

Well for me it's because I can't have 90% of them, and the other 10% I don't want. That's the simple version. And being on totse, very few of us can get whoever we want. Then again it's hard for everyone I think. If it's not one wall to jump over, it's another.

dude i'd say its the same reason you want anything you cant have. but like what do you really mean liek wanting a really hot chick but your like a loser? or being really studly and having said hot chick but she's a total bitch? idk you so reverse that if your female. i dont mean to insult with the loser thing i just want to know the "cant have" situations your meaning.

It's all in the chase, man.

Heh if you put your mind to it you can have the type of person you want, even the ones you think you cant have. You just gotta do the work and know how to do it. I went from saying man i wish i could get some girls of the "sort" that i preferred over the rest. With effort i broke thru from wishing to having, its a good feeling of self accomplishment knowing that you didnt settle for less and took the extra step to obtain near exact match of what you want.

Just saying it can be done. Dont settle for less, my friends brother has been doing that all his life and every girl has led him into a life of hell, just because he THINKS he cant get the girls he wishes he could have. Boy did i learn lessons from watching this dude being owned and mortified by the girls nobody wants, wouldnt think it would happen. Thats whyd id rather pass up a girl of that sort to wait for something better. Save the headaches and hardships.

i guess it's partially the 'grass is greener' mentality, coupled with really good chemistry that you don't normally find in people.

This is what I was thinking.

Also, how about the womens we know we shouldnt be with, but want anyway? You know, the ones that just arent good for ya, but you want anyway. Probably goes back to the quote.

This can be summed up with one very old and true saying.....

"The grass is always greener on the other side"

Oh I thought of something kind of cool/mystical. How about it's the ones we want that we are too afraid to be real with, and thus we never know if we could've had them or not.

GOD FUCKING PHONE RINGS IN MY PHILOSOPHICAL BLISS. FUCK YOU.

How about it's the ones we want that we are too afraid to be real with, and thus we never know if we could've had them or not.



Im reading this again and again, and I still cant wrap my poor little brain around it.

And its not the grass is greener thing. Im wanting somone, who I know is bad for me, wont go anywhere with, blah blah. Im wondering what makes people think it will work. Im trying anyway, but sometimes it feels futile.

Maybe I dont know what the fuck Im asking.

This doesn't really have anything to do with the topic butttt I want to post still dammit!
Seeeeee they like me and then I screw it up!!!!! annnd they lose interest, cause I want to go slow, or they think I am "playing hard to get" sigh... its depressing, but whatevs.

Most of the times people referring to wanting what we can't have in regards to relationships is usually about wanting somebody that is already in a relationship, very often that somebody is somebody that used to be in a relationship with you. So the desire can come from many sources: you clearly wanted them before for some reason so there are all of those, you may want closure out of the thing because the "what if" is the most excrutiating question to follow you around, lingering jealousy and feelings of possession when they were yours, just not wanting them to find satisfaction in another showing you how inept you are as a human being, desire not to see other people getting happy off of your fun box.

It usually boils down to a nigh solipsistic self absorption in demanding your happiness at the expense of everybody around you.

Some of us just don't grow out of the "MINE!!" stage...well most of us, really.

Well, I have only really wanted one guy for three years. he's been perfectly available until recently. I was just too much of a coward. Now he is with my best friend and I have to watch them together all the time at school and hear about how great he is. It fucking hurts.

On topic, I want the one I can't have, but not because I can't have him. He's just the only guy I've ever liked and feel 100% safe around.

because love/emotions are a terrible thing....i still want my exgirlfriend who dumped me 2 months ago....even though i think she's a dirty whore for shit she did before we got together...and for cheating on her ex with me WHEN we got together.... i dont want to be into her, but i cant help it....all i want to do is get past her, put her out of my mind....i know i cant have her, and probably never will again....reason and logic aren't working with me on this one...

It could be 'the grass is greener', as previously stated, but I also think it's due to stubbornness and wanting what you can't have.

Everyone is in the Pursuit of (what they think is) happiness instead of being content with what they have. Also imagining what you could have/could never have, is more enjoyable then actually having it. Its the thrill of the chase, once you bagged your prize or found your white rabbit, the excitement/anticipation dissapears.

The above statement is all too true when it comes to women, but not when it comes to drugs. In my experience, you'll be lucky to be content with your partner who you chased down but you'll always be satisfied once you've finally got that perfect drug you spent hours and money on.

Just a thought.

Oh, and an example for the chap who can't understand the "can't be real with the ones we want" idea.

Girl A is superfine. You want Girl A. Girl B is your best friend, but someone you are not interested in. You are not honest with Girl A because you want to score, but you are with Girl B because you are comfortable around her. Until you behave around Girl A like you do Girl B, you will never bag Girl A, because women want men that are real, not fabricated to get in their pants. Hope this clarifies.

Is the grass always greener? Is this something that you can grow out of?

Our bodies think that because we can't get them, they're somewhat more special or beneficial to mate with.
Hello unrequited love.