I'm 16 years old and am currently going into grade 11. I havent been with a chick since the middle of grade 9, and I have recently met this girl I have fallen for. She is good girlfriend material and I would love to have a relationship with her. Problem is I only have fingered my ex-girlfriend(my first real girlfriend ever) a bunch of times, couple blowjobs, couple handjobs no big deal, there was no sex. Well apparently she's dated 15+ guys and has fucked around with a bunch of them claiming "Everything but sex, i'm still a virgin" I felt my gut as if it were punched by Chuck Norris. I felt it as a big turn off and kinda intimidating? She has told me she likes me a lot and she's never been so happy, quite honestly I havent been as happy either since I have met her, so it's not like there isnt a reason to be together. Do I have anything to worry about and should It even bother me this much? (I wasn't able to sleep and my stomach still feels like shit).

Any advice at all? I'm sure someone is on S&A.

i guess you accept her for who she is RIGHT NOW AND THEN...or you dont accept her at all....only you can choose that

That's completely true man, but is it normal to feel this way after hearing that?

Dude, I know the gut punch feeling exactly.
Its just your instincts that are hurt cuz she is 'your woman'
Have you seen Chasing Amy?
You shouldn't worry about this, this is just the 'idiot gear' screwing you over.
Her past shouldn't matter, but it does.

I felt like crap when my girlfriend just mentioned an ex in passing.
But you'll learn to work through it.

If she makes you happy, you'll forget about the past, youll have to.

Also, for gods sake, break up with old girlfriend.
Stop cheating on that poor girl, cmon.

If she's good, she won't mention them. My boyfriend has been with a number of girls before me. He says after meeting me, he regrets ever doing anything with them. He wishes that I was his first time. So, don't get discouraged as long as she stays devoted to you.

I know that feeling as well. At least you know she isn't square.

Everyone has a past buddy.
If you dwell too much on the past you miss out on the good shit happening in the present, which in turn fucks up the future.

She may have a little more experience than you but she's told you she really likes you and is happy with you...Accept that.

And when it comes to all this fingering, licking, sucking, etc stuff there are plenty of times you can just bullshit your way through. I've been with girls who have had more sexual experience than me (years ago of course! :p ) and I still managed to blow their minds by just getting on with it and enjoying myself.

I'm currently single Bean, I should have been more clear as I was dumped in the middle of grade 9 (She liked someone else) and havent been with a girl since.

Also thanks for all the positive advice and feedback, it's appreciated much.

Totse is the pepto bismal for heartache.

Also forgot to mention she claims every one her past relationships in highschool was pretty much for guys to get their dicks wet.

Also forgot to mention she claims every one her past relationships in highschool was pretty much for guys to get their dicks wet.

Hang about...She says that she's done everything other than sex. and that she's still a virgin. Yet all her past relationships were so her boyfriend could get his dick wet?

What was she doing...Spitting on it?

tell her you have to fuck her now to stick it to all those other guys.

Hang about...She says that she's done everything other than sex. and that she's still a virgin. Yet all her past relationships were so her boyfriend could get his dick wet?

What was she doing...Spitting on it?

These other guys had no feelings or means of caring for her, pretty much just trying to get laid, but she wouldn't fuck them.

I see....

Well show her how much you care, chill and just do whatever comes naturally.

Have you seen Chasing Amy?
You shouldn't worry about this, this is just the 'idiot gear' screwing you over.
Her past shouldn't matter, but it does.I have never been a member of any other forum where Chasing Amy is aptly quoted so fucking frequently. That movie should be required viewing here...

Bob: So there's me and Amy, and we're all inseparable, right? Just big time in love. And then about four months in, I ask about the ex-boyfriend. Dumb move, I know, but you know how it is - you don't really want to know, but you just have to... stupid guy bullshit. Anyway she starts telling me all about him - how they dated for years, lived together, her mother likes me better, blah, blah, blah - and I'm okay. But then she tells me that a couple times, he brought other people to bed with them - menage a tois, I believe it's called. Now this just blows my mind. I mean, I'm not used to that sort of thing, right? I was raised Catholic.

...

So I get weirded out, and just start blasting her, right? This is the only way I can deal with it - by calling her a slut, and telling her that she was used - I mean, I'm out for blood I wanted to hurt her - because I don't know how to deal with what I'm feeling. And I'm like "What the fuck is wrong with you?" and she's telling me that it was that time, in that place, and she didn't do anything wrong, so she's not gonna apologize. So I tell her it's over, and I walk.

JAY: Fucking A!

BOB:No, idiot. It was a mistake. I wasn't disgusted with her, I was afraid. At that moment, I felt small - like I'd lacked experience, like I'd never be on her level or never be enough for her or something. And what I didn't get was that she didn't care. She wasn't looking for that guy anymore. She was looking for me. But by the time I realized this, it was too late, you know. She'd moved on, and all I had to show for it was some foolish pride, which then gave way to regret. She was the girl, I know that now. But I pushed her away...

Everyone's silent Silent Bob lights a cigarette.

BOB: So I've spent every day since then chasing Amy...
(takes a drag from his smoke)
So to speak.


Now, obviously, you're not in love with this girl, she's not the one, you're not in a serious relationship, you don't wear an overcoat, yadda yadda yadda. But the message is the same- your relative inexperience makes you feel small, and you don't know how to deal with a woman who has more experience. It's not the way society has brought you up.

To pilfer a few more appropriate quotes from the Prophet Kevin Smith, this time from the booklet included in the Chasing Amy collectors edition DVD:There are these unspeakable, ingrained mistruths men are brought up to believe about sex: We're dominant, we should go to bed with whores, but wake up with virgins... those things that we're not necessarily taught, but that- thanks to our patriarchal society- still become part of our consciousness, regardless.Seemingly, the thorny issue in the romantic career of every young man (or "guy" as we're called during that awkward period between high school and true adulthood), a partner's sexual past has a way of ruining an otherwise healthy relationship (well, that's not entirely true; the past may be the issue, but the guy himself is usually the dork who does the relationship trashing). And being a "guy," I was no exception- my insecurities stemmed from the fear of having to measure up to somebody... or to a lot of somebodiesThe bottom line is that what you're feeling is fairly normal. A lot of guys go through it. No, you shouldn't put so much emphasis on it, and it shouldn't upset you as much as it does, at least not in an ideal world. But this is not an ideal world, and it does upset you. So you need to either learn to get over it and to accept people for who they are and, more importantly, to accept you for who you are, or you'll just end up pushing her away.

+1 for quoting Chasing Amy dude...Nicely put.

15+ guys and STILL in high school...I don't think she is girlfriend material.

Not for a LONG TERM relationship.

I didn't think of it that way....

I agree with this a LOT!

Don't put all your eggs in this basket dude...Have fun with her, be with her but don't go for anything too serious.