I recently got in touch with my ex who sent me a couple pics of our daughter, whom I haven't asked about or anything in about a year. It never really bugged me that I don't care or never ask about my own kid until now, I swear when I saw those pics I could hear her saying something like "where is my daddy, why isn't he here with me?" :(

Basically, since day one (3 years ago) when she was born, my girl took her away from me (knowing my nature and character she doubted our daughter would benefit from my involvement in her life.) My folks were aware of this but didn't give a red fuck about it so they couldn't be relied on for shit.
In the beginning I did want to see her and help with anything I could but my ex decided to be a cagey bitch and denied me any access and kept reminding me "you wanted me to abort her, YOU don't want her." So I didn't insist, I just tried to forget everything and to go on doing whatever the hell the stupid shit I did back in those days. I truly didn't really care about her or the baby and I continued going my way, travelling from place to place, occasionally (about every 6 months) sending her an IM/email to ask how she's doing, mostly out of curiosity -- not concern.

And I'll admit right now: I didn't care about my own kid to even ask. I guess you can call me an asshole but at least I'm not a hypocrite like most spineless cock-suckers who give an even less of a flying fuck about their kids but still take custody and pretend (or delude themselves to think) to care because otherwise they don't feel morally pure/secure and just create more victims and fuck up more lives in the end to justify their moronic personal insecurities.
So I think you get the big picture as to why I made this decision: I just feel like my little girl is in the right hands and she deserves a way better parent than I had and doesn't need to deal with my shit.

However, I'm not completely happy with my decision and feel like a complete asshole now, so the reason I'm posting this is 'cuz I wanna know what y'all would do if you were in my position. Do you think I should call/ask about her more often? I'd even send some money if I wasn't so goddamn broke. :(

I dont think it's assholish to not have contact with a kid you didnt even want.
Atleast you had the balls to not fake a sappy castrated smile and become a crap father at a stupidly young age. It's a shame you didnt use a condom, yeah, but she chose to bring the kid into the world, not you.


She doesent sound like she particularly ever wants you to be part of the childs life. If you can, I'd reccomend severing communication completely. Apart from anything, how long before the bitch starts to try and claim money from you?

You didn't want the kid, you don't need to feel bad. Any hardship is solely thanks to mommy

I wonder what gang your kid's gonna join and how hard he's gonna punch you when he meets you...

It's a she.

I dont think it's assholish to not have contact with a kid you didnt even want.
Atleast you had the balls to not fake a sappy castrated smile and become a crap father at a stupidly young age. It's a shame you didnt use a condom, yeah, but she chose to bring the kid into the world, not you.

Yeah... and the reason I didn't use a trojan was 'cuz she told me she was on the pill... and the fact that most of 'em are bullshittin' you with that is not something you're aware of at 14.

She doesent sound like she particularly ever wants you to be part of the childs life. If you can, I'd reccomend severing communication completely. Apart from anything, how long before the bitch starts to try and claim money from you?

Well I doubt that would be possible to effectuate overseas or over provinces but I've considered it. Man, I dunno... :/

Thanks yoyobek, I'd +5 if that shitty dupery of a rep system was still present.

Yeah... and the reason I didn't use a trojan was 'cuz she told me she was on the pill... and the fact that most of 'em are bullshittin' you with that is not something you're aware of at 14.
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That's entrapment. It's not illegal, but it should be.

If you made clear to her you had no desire to be a father and she went ahead and brought a child into the world regardless...
Well that's just her problem. Not yours.

she told me she was on the pill... and the fact that most of 'em are bullshittin' you .

Could someone please explain to me why a girl would lie about that?

Could someone please explain to me why a girl would lie about that?

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I'm a clock...

The kid would at the least have something to blame all their problems on. "I never had a father blah blah blah..."

Could someone please explain to me why a girl would lie about that?

Child support...aka easy ching-chang money!

Or some bitches are just desperate to have kids...I know this one girl who want to have kid since she was 10 years old. She kept pulling "I'm on pills" method on every guy she fucked(Surprisely, most of the guys were smart enough to wear a condom anyway).

Um, I'm pretty sure that it takes a male and a female to create a child. Just because she didn't feel comfortable killing the fetus inside of her doesn't mean that it's solely her responsibility for giving life to this child.

I do think you're an asshole for not wanting to see your own daughter. That's just .... cold.

And the cycle continues!

Here's your daughter's life in a nutshell........

Since she'll never have a father, she'll probably be searching for a daddy figure and be cock hungry by 12 or 13. But "learning" from Mommy not to have kids at such a young age she'll be the blowjob and anal queen on the block, taking the "safer" approach. And considering she's been raised by a selfish and not very rational Mommy, she probably won't be loved much on that end either. So at the very grown up age of 16 she'll finally find "the one" and give up her "virginity" (at least one orifice that hasn't been violated by 1/2 the football team). That is if she is LUCKY to still be a virgin by her own consent, because since Mommy sounds like such a horny silly whore there's a good chance she'll be having flavor of the week guys strolling in and out of her life and its quite probable one of them will start molesting/fucking your daughter on the side. So after all of that and because she is SOOOOOOO desperate to find/feel real love.....she'll more than likely want to have a kid of her own. That thing she can always love, will love her back and she can forever call her own. And she'll play whatever game with that guy she thinks is "the one", and start squeezing out babies herself before she's a junior in high school.

Congratulations! You're breeding a whole lineage of irresponsible losers. Yeah, you are an asshole......now go huff Raid.

Ok I was gonna make a thread called "am I can asshole" but since you already made one I'll attach.

Tonight I went to a buddy of mines place who lives in the heart of the city and has a bomb apartment in a seriously awesome location right downtown so has lots of cool people coming in and out. He does a lot of coke so lots of drug dealers come in and out which is how I met him. He's actually a cartoonist and has done anitimation for Disney, "george of the jungle, john cay (of ren and stinpy) and Johnny Test."
Tonight me and my friend went over there and started drinking and this girl that was already there started hitting on me or something and wanted to see me naked cuz I'm sexy and we played strip poker. I beat her at least 7 times in a row and got to see her tits a bunch of times. I was kinda disrepecting her because I always won and she was just a ho to me. Y'know like a dime a dozen even though she was pretty hot. She worked at a pet store though and was talking about animals and how nice they are which I thought was dumb. Anyways I didn't give a fuck about her and she ends up talking to my friend and bein like "I don't like your friend" because I was bein kinda rude to her and probably called her a slut or something cuz I was drunk and smokin lots of weed. I said "I don't give a fuck you skank" or something similar and she was like "WHAT?" and I said somethin else equally disrespectful because I honestly didn't give a fuck.

Basically she was pretty good looking and I shut her down, broke her game a bit and made her show her tits and treated her like dirt and she said she didn't like me, am I going to hell? Or am I just yer average asshole...

I do think you're an asshole for not wanting to see your own daughter. That's just .... cold.

cold? he didnt want a kid. its like if i dont want a dog, and say my hypothetical gf bought a dog, it wouldnt be cold if i didnt want to see said dog.

Or am I just yer average asshole...

See now this is a more difficult scenario to weigh on the asshole scale. Topless chick hanging out and flirting with guys at cocaine parties? Yeah, your analysis of the fact she is slutty is probably accurate. Chances are by the end of the night she was snorting some nice fat lines off of SOMEONE'S cock. But while you were accurate in your assessment, what is the point in saying it to her? Why not just enjoy the show you got from her, realize you weren't into her and nicely moved on. Granted tits are just tits, but your night could have been alot worse than having some hottie getting friendly with you while half naked at what sounds to be a pretty decent party. But still and all she IS a hoe, so it's not like your really "wrong" about anything just perhaps a little rude without any legitimate reason.

I give you a 3 on the asshole scale, where the OP merits a 9.5

See now this is a more difficult scenario to weigh on the asshole scale. Topless chick hanging out and flirting with guys at cocaine parties? Yeah, your analysis of the fact she is slutty is probably accurate. Chances are by the end of the night she was snorting some nice fat lines off of SOMEONE'S cock. But while you were accurate in your assessment, what is the point in saying it to her? Why not just enjoy the show you got from her, realize you weren't into her and nicely moved on. Granted tits are just tits, but your night could have been alot worse than having some hottie getting friendly with you while half naked at what sounds to be a pretty decent party. But still and all she IS a hoe, so it's not like your really "wrong" about anything just perhaps a little rude without any legitimate reason.

I give you a 3 on the asshole scale, where the OP merits a 9.5

I agree, I just got an ego to satisfy.

am I just yer average asshole...

No, you're a dick.
A friend of mine explained this recently and I liked how he put it. You're an asshole if you're playing with a girl's head in an attempt to get in her pants. You can pull some mean jokes, but just enough for her say, "heyyy! That's mean!" which is when you turn the tables and say you were just kidding.
You're a dick if you instead say something along the lines of "fucking deal with it, you skank" and walk off to light up a cigarette. Being an asshole is okay, but being a dick, well, nobody likes that at all.

OP, your emotions are making you feel the way you do. Logically, however, you have no obligations to the child, as your intentions were apparently made very clear from the start. Logic and emotion mix like oil and water.

Well it's being kind of a dick, but I would do it to. And hey you aren't as bad as the OP, who is probably a lying troll anyway so you still win the asshole award given that yyour story is slightly more believable.

My dad was never around. SO what. I have other problems to worry about. The daddy excuse is for low life's who've run out of shit to blame their behavior on.

Said the dude who calls himself "Kriminal Minded"

I'm sure a father could have helped with that one.

Said the dude who calls himself "Kriminal Minded"

I'm sure a father could have helped with that one.

Oh noes! I'm sure there must be some deeply rooted obsession with the night that made you choose the name GrimNocturnal, which of course shows a lack of proper parental supervision of daytime activities and a clear case of an Oedipus complex.

Seriously, I haven't seen my mother in a decade, and I'm turning out okay. One parent can be good enough for a child, so long as they aren't a douchebag and give a damn about their kid's life.

Also, the OP, you aren't a bad person. You never wanted the child, it was her decision to bring it into the world, and you are being mature by not wanting to just be a false asshole that would raise a child they don't love, and probably give her even more issues.

That second guy, who went to his friend's coke party, there is nothing wrong with you either. Who gives a shit what the fuck happens to some coke whore? I'm sure by the end of the night she had plenty of dick and coke to forget all about it.

There is absolutely no reason why you should feel bad.

She used you as pretty much nothing more than a sperm dispenser.
No doubt if you'd have stuck around you'd be swamped under kids and she'd keep shitting them out, you'd both be unhappy and stressed and you'd be thinking "damn. This is life?"

If you didnt want to father a kid thats fine, especially as she lied to you and tricked you into impregnating her.


get over it and get on with your life.

No, you're a dick.
A friend of mine explained this recently and I liked how he put it. You're an asshole if you're playing with a girl's head in an attempt to get in her pants. You can pull some mean jokes, but just enough for her say, "heyyy! That's mean!" which is when you turn the tables and say you were just kidding.
You're a dick if you instead say something along the lines of "fucking deal with it, you skank" and walk off to light up a cigarette. Being an asshole is okay, but being a dick, well, nobody likes that at all.

OP, your emotions are making you feel the way you do. Logically, however, you have no obligations to the child, as your intentions were apparently made very clear from the start. Logic and emotion mix like oil and water.

You're dumb as fak. I wasn't even tryin to get in her head I just beat her like 7 or 8 times in row playin strip poker and decided she wasn't worthy of my respect and should know that I'm better than her. Her friend who I would have liked to get with was asleep while this was going on which was pretty crazy considerin how loud it was. What's wrong with keepin a chick in line? I think my friend probably got with her because he gives less of a fuck than I do. I was gonna take a pic of her tits on my phone but decided against it.

You're dumb as fak. I wasn't even tryin to get in her head I just beat her like 7 or 8 times in row playin strip poker and decided she wasn't worthy of my respect and should know that I'm better than her. Her friend who I would have liked to get with was asleep while this was going on which was pretty crazy considerin how loud it was. What's wrong with keepin a chick in line? I think my friend probably got with her because he gives less of a fuck than I do. I was gonna take a pic of her tits on my phone but decided against it.

You're a virgin. Shut up.

You're a virgin. Shut up.

You wish you frigid hag who wants to rape my nubile young body.

It aint cool to hijack threads.

Could someone please explain to me why a girl would lie about that?

'Tis called nature, pal. Once a chick is already all over you and wet... she ain't gonna wait tomorrow for you to get a condom or a month for the pill to get into her system.

Or some bitches are just desperate to have kids...I know this one girl who want to have kid since she was 10 years old. She kept pulling "I'm on pills" method on every guy she fucked(Surprisely, most of the guys were smart enough to wear a condom anyway).

It ain't that, she never really expressed a desire to get knocked up, it was only when we realized she was pregnant is when she was getting into emotional idiot-loops and refused to do anything about it.

I do think you're an asshole for not wanting to see your own daughter. That's just .... cold.

I did wanna see her in the beginning -- she took her away from me and didn't want ME to see her.

OP, your emotions are making you feel the way you do. Logically, however, you have no obligations to the child, as your intentions were apparently made very clear from the start. Logic and emotion mix like oil and water.

I dunno if I wanna be logical right now... =/

And the cycle continues!

Here's your daughter's life in a nutshell........

Since she'll never have a father, she'll probably be searching for a daddy figure and be cock hungry by 12 or 13. But "learning" from Mommy not to have kids at such a young age she'll be the blowjob and anal queen on the block, taking the "safer" approach. And considering she's been raised by a selfish and not very rational Mommy, she probably won't be loved much on that end either. So at the very grown up age of 16 she'll finally find "the one" and give up her "virginity" (at least one orifice that hasn't been violated by 1/2 the football team). That is if she is LUCKY to still be a virgin by her own consent, because since Mommy sounds like such a horny silly whore there's a good chance she'll be having flavor of the week guys strolling in and out of her life and its quite probable one of them will start molesting/fucking your daughter on the side. So after all of that and because she is SOOOOOOO desperate to find/feel real love.....she'll more than likely want to have a kid of her own. That thing she can always love, will love her back and she can forever call her own. And she'll play whatever game with that guy she thinks is "the one", and start squeezing out babies herself before she's a junior in high school.

Shit on that shit! As long as I exist anywhere in this fucking huge shitbasket y'all call Earth: I ain't gonna let that happen. While my ex is a moronic hoe with perky tits: she is a good mom and at least has parents to support her unlike me, last time I checked (especially on the photographs) my kid looks generally happy although I can also notice there's more to it than that. I doubt she'll be getting knocked up in the future 'cuz she turned to feminist idealogy after we broke up a.k.a she despises guys now.

Congratulations! You're breeding a whole lineage of irresponsible losers. Yeah, you are an asshole......now go huff Raid.

Now theres a more typical response that I got from most dipshits back in those days. Get this clue: I was even willing to pay for her abortion since I had some spare cash back then, but she was too twisted in her emotional instability about not feeling wanted and shit and claiming the only reason I want her pregnancy terminated is so I could still have a wet vice to stick my dick in (and that's bullshit.)

Ehh... I'll live.

to the guys asking about why girls would lie about being on the pill etc - she might not be lying. lots of girls think that they are on the pill but don't realise that they have to take it every single day, or that it's not effective if they're taking antibiotics, and that if they get sick and are throwing up for a few days, it could mean that they end up missing pills (because they've been thrown up). also, the pill doesn't always work.

I STRESS: ALWAYS USE 2+ FORMS OF BIRTH CONTROL.

OP: if you don't want to be a father, don't do the child harm by faking it. i don't think that contact is a good idea, if you can't provide a good, solid role model who is dependable and caring, your daughter might be better off with her mother. also, the child support thing. that would suck.