I'm going out with a friend who I've known for a couple of years. She's VERY OK looking, maybe a 6.5/10. She's also not very willing to fuck in general, although she is in love with me. So, I ask, how can I condense 3 years of relationships into 3 hours? And finish the night so that she doesn't hate me?

Honestly, if it was just fucking her, I could manage, but I have to make her not hate me at the end, and that's hard. We're going out tonight, and short of GHB I have no idea how to pull this off...

As for why I don't just say fuck it and go get laid by hot drunk chicks? I really want to fuck her, and I'm having a sort of dry spell (lately I've been getting too drunk to leave the house, you know).

xTc. Or guilt trips. Or whip out your monster cock. Or tell her that you want to express your deep feelings for her in the most powerful way you know how: through the spiritual communion of sex. Explain how in almost every religious mysticism (Kabbalah (sp?), Yoga, Zen practices etc) breath is representative of the soul, and sexual juices of life's essence and while having sex, there is an admixture of both, thus creating the most powerful emotional action she could experience. Or you could brain her with a lamp.

Dammit, you guys are no help. Thanks to you, I'm drunk off my ass at 8pm, about to go paint a fence instead of get pussy. Thanks.

I really want to fuck her, and I'm having a sort of dry spell

Because you're a cocky, ignorant son of a bitch. Go fuck your mother, you desperate prick.

Because you're a cocky, ignorant son of a bitch. Go fuck your mother, you desperate prick.

Mature. I might actually bother and "defend my manliness", but I don't think it's in any jeopardy fromsuch an unintelligible post.

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Back in grown up land, let me reiterate my question.

I like this girl as a friend, but I want to fuck her because it's been like 5 years between us and I for myself want to get that out of the way. I know she won't agree to what I suggest (maybe she will, but doubtful, she's SOMEWHAT religious), and I can't hurt her. Yes, it would be easy as fuck to lead her on and fuck her, but I don't want her to hate me after this any more than she has to. And yes, she likes me.

Now, is there a way I can pull this off, or should I just give up trying? I have time, since I got drunk and stayed in tonight, I have more time to think of a better plan.

It's the not being hated or dated in the morning part that makes this tricky. If she loves you then she's probably willing to sleep with you, in certain contexts. The problem is that those contexts would probably involve an actual relationship or promising one.

Has she actually admitted to you that she loves you or is that something you've surmised?

She's in love with you but doesn't want to fuck you? Odd, but women generally are an odd breed.

Hrm.. what way would I go about it?

I have heard of an idea that makes it seem like you and the girl have been seeing each other for longer than you do. Tell her to imagine a series of dates, you creating the situation and what you're going to do etc.

I really don't know what to say to this one most girls I sleep with I've not been friends with before. What do you normally do to get laid? Will it not apply in the same situation? This could take time and luck. So I'll wish you the best of.

We've been together 5 years. It's mostly been MSN conversations and such, but the last 2 years I moved away from that, so we talk on the phone every now and then, and meet up every 2 weeks or something.

She'd fuck me if she thought there was a relationship coming, and even then, it would take a lot of persuasion to make her fuck me on the first date. Not a problem though, it can be done.

The problem is after I fuck her, I'd tell her "I don't really want a relationship", and that's where the problems would start. I'd have tricked her into bed, and because she means more to me than the other random sluts I get with, I'd feel really bad, and our friendship would be over.

It's basically a "how do I fuck my friend while staying friends" deal, when she's not into the 1 night stand...

Still would like help...

Ask her if she wants to be friends with benefits?

It sounds like there's no real respectable way to get her in bed. If you do, you'll probably have to trick her some way or another. If you can live with this, then by all means it's an option. Since she's yourf friend, however, I would hope that you wouldn't be so quick to take advantage of her.

Depends what kind of girl she is and how you go about doing work with her..talking to her and stuff that is.....If you were well trained and knew what to do, id say theres a great chance of pulling it off...3hrs is more than enough time...im going to possibly speed run a situation like that...(will go into more detail if i pull it off LMFAO look for a possible new topic)i could of pulled some gold of the bag with this one chick, but because of miscommunication(not going into detail) i got jipped...my mistake..otherwise my mistake could of turned into something official.....

How is it our fault you don't get poouuuuusy?

It could be done, but no. It's simply not the right thing to do.

Why don't you want more than sex with this girl?

I think I'll try the "I'm a virgin" line. Maybe she'll be honored to be my first, she's a virgin most likely. And then I could tell her "I'm not ready for the whole dating and sex thing".

That'll be letting her down easy. I just have to make sure she never sees me when I've got my drunk on.

And yes, I'm a horrible person.

If she's only a 6.5 and totally into you, under these circumstances, I'd come up with some corny line about how you used to be into her and how a few years ago you would have loved to have taken your relationship to the next level.

See how she responds and it should be pretty easy from there. Make sure she has a couple drinks in her. If her response if favorable, lean in for the makeout and take it from there.

But I want her to be cool about it and us to remain friends.

But I want her to be cool about it and us to remain friends.

Yeah but by my approach you're pretty much making it clear to her that your "crush" for her was in the past, and you're either over it now or for whatever reasons a relationship just isn't possible at the time.

When you go in for the move, she'll either reject you, knowing that she's setting herself up to get hurt, or she'll embrace it, fully aware that a future relationship is out of the question.

And, if the both of you are drunk, it makes this whole situation easier to justify the next day. She'll be upset but it's really not all that devious of a plan...it'll make it easier to write off as a drunken mistake without her hating you, and even if she's mad at first, you seem intelligent enough to work your way back into a friendship with her...and who knows, it could possibly even bring you two closer. I know I'm now closer with some of my female friends after hooking up with them.

I'm going out with a friend...

So from here on, it doesn't make that much sense to me... your entire situation basically.

Surely if it's a friendship, you should be working on that, and hey, workin' out the friends with benefits stuff... ;)

But that's a partnership thing, no? It needs some effort not just something you can lay-down the rules on... maybe that's why you're in this "pickle" in the first place? Try and connect with her as a person when you do see her... if she wants a bit of interaction and whatnot, shit, even a fuckbuddy deserves that...

Good luck man, I guess i'd say just don't be an asshole and try and "use" her, be yourself and respect her feelings and she might be more trustin' n physically inclined towards you :)

Hmm, well, you could try "I'm a virgin, but I'd rather my first time was with a friend so I wouldn't have to be nervous etc". It's just an expanded version of what you were suggesting. It puts into her head that it might be good to do a shake down run with a friend who's not going to judge etc.

Anyway, good luck and try not to do anything too evil.