So this morning my best friend Alex (the only person I completely trust and would die at a moment's notice for) told me he'd been cutting. I haven't heard from him since (he texted me at like 7) and I feel responsible mainly because I used to have the habit. And when he used to ask me why, I'd tell him how it would dull the pain I felt, how it became something I'd do to get to sleep at night. I knew he was depressed, but I didn't know it'd come to this... He drinks pretty much every night, smokes whenever weed's around. I'd seen him burn himself--and it was one of the most shocking things I've ever seen. We had been drinking on our way to tennessee (bonnaroo) and were out side having a couple cigarettes... and he stubbed one out on his wrist. My jaw dropped. But to know he's cutting, that he's been doing it more and more habitually... It really scares me. I mean, I know it's not that bad (i've been through it, i was able to stop before it got dangerous) but nonetheless i can't help but feel disturbed that he's feeling so much pain he'd resort to this. I don't know what to do... I'm kind of at a loss for words, emotions, everything.

It could be a lot worse dude. He will probably grow out of it on his own and realize how stupid it is.

How bad is the cutting, like enough to kill himself or just enough to look like he wants to kill himself?

HE'S been cutting? What self respecting male cuts themself? Apparently not one that respects themself. I used to put out smokes on my hand when I was drunk to improve focus or prove how awesome I was or something, I dunno, I was 14.

Anyways, get a new friend and tell your boy to get a new life and stop acting like some dumbfucking 13 year old emo girl.

You put out smokes on your hand because you were insecure. OP, get him out of his depression, or let him slowly kill himself. Your choice.

You put out smokes on your hand because you were insecure.

Well WTF do you know and how does that make any sense? Believe me that's not true.

It's not enough to kill himself, or even close. He's been doing other things, though won't really specify, and has just recently escalated to using a blade. Getoffmylawn, I've never really liked you, but you're entitled to your own opinion.

I don't know how to get him out of this depression he has. I don't want to get into why he is so depressed, but it's in such a way that I don't know how to help him. Like, it seems to stem from a lot of things but he seems to focus solely on specific thing. And I don't know if my own methods with dealing with depression will work for him... It's kind of like all I can do for him is listen to him and hope he pulls through it.

Getoffmylawn, I've never really liked you, but you're entitled to your own opinion.

And I've never cared enough about you to form an opinion of you. Just like your parents!

Get him a steel just to show how much you care.

Just because you used to have the habit doesnt mean your responible for him doing it too. If he is really that depressed he probably would have started cutting anyways.

Well , since hes your bestfriend you probably know some ways to cheer him up.

Bake him a cake?

If he's only just started using blades, he can't be too deeply addicted. I've been a hibitually cutter for 7 years, have 2 friends who also do it. It's not something we learnt from each other, and its probably the same for him. You cant pretend he had never heard of it before you mentioned it.
As for how to help him, be there and listenning to him is about all that can be expected. If you think it will help, try to get him proffesional help, though it probably wont help at all.

:/ i normally just lurk around totse cause my account has a gay name :P but nehow before me and my girlfriend started going owt we were just friends and i used to cut because life just didn't seem worth anything and one thing she told me that made me stop was "if u cut then i will" and because i cared for her i stopped cutting sounds stupid but it worked

HE'S been cutting? What self respecting male cuts themself? Apparently not one that respects themself. I used to put out smokes on my hand when I was drunk to improve focus or prove how awesome I was or something, I dunno, I was 14.
.

That's pathetic. You make fun of one form of self harm and then brag about an equally stupid form that you do to yourself?

Hypocrisy and Arrogance are two very sick things.




Thread starter, there's nothing much you can do. Probably it's just a thing he's going through, and as patronising as it sounds, he'll get over it.

Be supportive sure, but dont care too much. Really, unless he's cutting down to the bone, or flaying himself alive, you dont need to worry too much.

That's pathetic. You make fun of one form of self harm and then brag about an equally stupid form that you do to yourself?

Hypocrisy and Arrogance are two very sick things.

.
woa you got that wrong he did it for usefullness focusing and and to show off, not to be a pussy.

That's pathetic. You make fun of one form of self harm and then brag about an equally stupid form that you do to yourself?

Hypocrisy and Arrogance are two very sick things.

Did I ever say it wasn't stupid? That's why I said "I dunno, I was 14" admitting stupidity. Everybody knows shit you did when you were 14 and drunk is inadmissable as charactor referance. I did it because I was drunk and it was kind of like an exercise of mind over matter like frats do when they make you recite the latin alphabet backwords while holding a match upside down. Am I saying frat boys aren't stupid? NO!

Anyways, I dunno what your problem is, people who cut themselves to get attention or because they hate themselves or something are sad/fucked/pathetic. I banged a girl who had a neck cutting fetish or something and had all these clawmarks on her neck at some point. That was kinda weird. Dunno what the point of that story was...

So genericwityusername tell ur friend to take his aggression out on someone other than himself or to end his life if he can't deal with normal existance...

:/ i normally just lurk around totse cause my account has a gay name :P but nehow before me and my girlfriend started going owt we were just friends and i used to cut because life just didn't seem worth anything and one thing she told me that made me stop was "if u cut then i will" and because i cared for her i stopped cutting sounds stupid but it workedI'd be very careful trying this. It may work, it may blow up in your face spectacularly.

Get on t3h pen0r FTW!

While its good you care about him and what happens to him , you have to realise that you aren't your brothers keeper.

If his cutting helps him work through things, if it gets him through the day, then what does it really matter?

We're all just limping towards Eden.

I need 60 tar dripping filterless handrolled ciggys and, for favourite, a litre and a half of scotch to get through the day.

Which is more harmful?

There is a tendency to get all panicky about cutting but unless he's doing himself real harm then there really isn't any reason to get all worked up.

If he was a chef then his hands and forearms would be covered in scars and burns but you wouldn't worry would you?

Cutting realeases endorphins;)

Cutting is for faggots. Tell him that if you cut too long you start to be attracted to men. Either he wil stop or you will learn something new about your friend.

Or you could try not to sport BS at innapropriate times.

who cares... not to be insensitive but it isn't hurting him and there are worse things to do and confronting him about it might sound good but i know from expierience that when i did stuff like that i rathered people didn't say anything i have had 2 girlfriends that cut and the first broke up with me because i confronted it... long story short if you confront him he will feel even worse

What is so wrong with cutting. I personally just hit solid objects really hard to dull the pain, the only reason I don't use a knife is because I'm to damn lazy to go get one.

^

Underachiever

You scared me so much there. I have an ex girlfriend who used to cut, who now is best friends with my mate alex. Took me a while to spot you lived in some far off place. Anyhows, try talking to him about why he does it, if he does it for some pussy reason then shout at him and call him a pussy till he stops. I have no sympathy for people like that. If, however, he has some serious shit going on then maybe he's best left to it. Cutting isn't mentally or physically healthy, but it's better than repressing his feelings and them coming out some other way. Good luck.

I dont see what the big deal about self harm is.

If you keep em covered with hygenic plasters at work, dont whine about them, dont use them to get sympathy, if you shut the fuck up and crawl on with your life, then big fucking deal if you cut.

*shrugs*

cutters are weak like paedophiles are weak.

They should all be gassed.

kill him, it's the only way.

I hope he fucking kills himself and he probably will it's natures way of getting rid of the inferior humans. It's survival of the fittest, nature at its best.