So on thursday, my girl of 7 months says that she needs space. which I know is a break up line. She tells me things like she doesn't love me and can't see herself with me in a few years. Said I didnt do anything wrong, actually treated her great, but she just didnt love me and needed some space.
She's called me everyday since then just to chat and make small talk. She called me twice today, after I called her once. She said she wants to get together for lunch tomorrow. I said I would. I don't know what to think really. I'm sure its not because she wants to get back together. But it has to mean something. I still really want to be with her, even if its not a serious relationship. if we slowed things down and stuff would be cool. I dont know what what to think.
any advice?

She's used to you. She's been with you for 7 months. Even though she doesnt love you. She's on her own now, she's alone. She's lonely and desperate, and its human nature to question what you lost. Even if its something you're hell bent against. I'd keep some serious distance between the two of you if I were you.

it sounds like you know what you're talking about here. Why should I keep some serious distance between us? could you elaborate? One of my best friends said the same. said I should try to stop talking to her and seriously distance myself from her. But thats the last thing I want to do. Its like theres a void in my life now that can only be filled by her. as lame as that sounds.

Yeah...it is pretty fucking lame.

But she's going through the same thing. Even though she doesnt love you, and in all likelihood never will, she still has to deal with that hole in her life that your absence will cause.

She's lonely, desperate, and rethinking her decision to leave you. Even though rationally she knows that she's better off leaving you be.

I dated my ex for a year. After which, I broke up with her. After that, we became friends with benefits and we still slept together. (By slept together I mean in each others arms after the sex). Even though I know she deserved the chance to move on, I was lonely. I didn't care about her, but I didn't want to be alone.

She's telling you that she wants to be friends. Either accept that she doesn't love you as a boyfriend and stay friends or move on.
<3

When did you guys first say you love each other?

Ugh the familiarity of your situation has made my stomach wrench with disgust, sorry mate.

I can understand your situation and where you're coming from and even how hard it is to look at it the way SilentMind put it, but he's right: you should try to put some distance between you two. Maybe after a while (I don't know) depending on how things go, you guys can be friends and you'll settle for that, but otherwise. . . forget it.

Cheers mate.

she first told me after about 2 months. She was drunk one night and we just had sex. She told me a lot of really nice things, like how I treated her better than anyone else ever had and other things like that. I told her that she was just drunk and didn't really love me. She said she wasn't. She told me she loved me again the next morning. So I said it back, but I didnt really feel it. She would say it to me occasionally for a while after that. the only time I would say it was when she said it to me. Eventually she pretty much just stopped saying it. I think its because she realized that I probably didnt love her.

after about 5 months or so I actually did start feeling it for her and I started telling her that I loved her....and she no longer loves me.

I still really want to be with her, even if its not a serious relationship. if we slowed things down and stuff would be cool. I dont know what what to think.
any advice?

Been there/done that my friend.

IMO

Cold turkey is the only way to go. There will be pain and confusion either way, but if she's still lingering around you will be less motivated to move on and fill the emptiness.

Take it for what it is: another one in the books

she wants to feel needed till she can get a new boyfriend. tell her to eat poop and die

Ah, the old situation of telling someone you love them when you don't. It's going to fuck things up eventually, it's just a matter of time.

As for her, I think she may either worry about you committing suicide, feel sorry for you, or just wants to be friends since she still likes you as a friend, but nothing more. I've had situations like this with girls, so maybe they think guys behave as irrationally as they do. As if we would kill outselves because some girl doesn't think we are good enough. Or hey, maybe it was just lust you two were feeling and after the crazy sex died down, she started seeing you in a different light.

I told her that I didn't know what to think, with her dumping me, but calling me everyday....last night and earlier today we had 2 really long conversations where we talked about a lot of this stuff....I said I couldnt figure out what was going through her head. I asked why she still called me and stuff. I said I hope you're not doing this out of pity or something. She said she wasn't, said she was calling because she really liked some of the conversations we had and generally liked talking to me.

She said she's not 100% sure she's done with me, but for now just needs to be alone to get her life back together. She said she'd like to do some friend things with me...like maybe go to the gym together and stuff....i'd like to do that. The first time around our relationship was started for the wrong reasons....maybe if we start over as friends it would work differently....not likely, but at least a possibility.

This is basically it, quick and simple. Although I'm not quite sure I agree with the poop eating and dying part.

Be careful with your own expectations man. Don't get your hopes up every single time you're with her, awaiting a moment where she'll just pop up and say "I fucked up!"

Chances are it's not going to happen that way.

Embrace the fact that she's never going to come back and leave it at that. Who knows-maybe she'll surprise you one day, but again don't get your hopes up.